Has anyone ever sorted out a completely, utterly, fucked up life?

[WindfallenArch]

I've no job, no friends, a disastrous marriage, no money, family all dead. I have two tween kids who used to make it all worthwhile, but now look at me with contempt and have no interest in being in the same room as me let alone doing something together. I'm a 42 year old fat alcoholic and I'm utterly pointless. I drag myself sadly through each day and I see no joy in anything at all. It hurts in my heart all the time I'm awake.
Has anyone ever sorted themselves out after fucking up everything they touched?

Sorry for the self pity. Today is particularly excruciating.

Hello Wind, your zoo adventures show what a very special mum you are, I cannot think of a lovelier way of showing how much you care

No job advice from me, I'm clueless on the career front! I didn't even get as far as college, despite having a pretty sharp brain. Now in a job that I love but it pays pennies. Fortunately DD was far better supported and educated, and is consequently flying career wise

Hope your meeting was productive and biscuit laden- what are your favourites?

I'm sorry, but I'm going to completely ignore all the nice stuff everyone has taken time to send a total stranger and pelt every sodding one of you with handful s of dummies out of my pram. It's shit tonight. Totally AWFUL.

I'd happily happily slice a man
In two at 120 rounds a second with my dummy gun. THE HOUSE IS TOO FUCKING SMALL TONIGHT AND ITS FULL OF OTHER PEOPLES UNNECESSARY JUNK AND LIMBS.

The kitchen is about the size of a TV remote and I've just stupidly cooked a meal in it and then had to sodding clean it afterwards and the kitchen is where I drink, secretly, and my drawer was empty and I want to smash things and weep.

As you were.

I don't know what to say, apart from flowers and cake (and half term is nearly over).

Tomorrow is a new day, a better day.

You're doing really really well. I know that means nothing tonight, but the fact you're feeling so much is good, but painful.

My DD keeps spitting her dummy out. Are you going to patent this dummy gun? Would be handy. Could fire them into her crib from bed.

for you though. Can you step into the garden for some lungfuls of cool fresh air?

Is it possible to go for a stopping, angry walk in the dark where you can swear a lot? Cold showers also work for me - it's so cold it stops you thinking altogether.

I don't really know what to do with myself, but I think I'll really put some effort into some star jumps and scowling. I'm on a period, so I should probably put something down to protect the carpet.

Nice bath and early night....tomorrows another day

Ha ha! For some reason your post reminds me of feminist Gloria Steinem's comment that if men had periods then they would "brag about how long and how much". "I'm a three pad at a time kinda guy"

Ha! Sorry for the randomness!

Hi wind, I've only seen this thread today and wanted to chip in with some moral support. Please keep going. You're funny, insightful and honest and deserve to be "happy", whatever that means (I'm a little way into the Derren Brown book, I really enjoy his work and am so far finding it an interesting read).

How are those star jumps going?

Onanotherday, you're kind :-) I've never understood baths though. To me it feels like being a bit of brisket in a casserole.

Hi claire quite early on I realised I had more capacity for the scowling aspect of the work out than the star jumps and opted to play to my strengths.

I love the way you write. You really are very funny and talented. I should think you could do some SEO copywriting for starters. Please charge though; don't undersell yourself. But as well as copywriting you should seriously think about writing a novel, play, script, poetry - whatever interests you. But do write something. I for one would pay to read it. Even if you just write for you, without ever intending to look for a publisher, it would be a start. Plus something to do in the lonely, difficult times.

Just spat weetabix all over myself and made a large "hurmp" noise like an elephant at your star jumps ! Tena lady sales would rocket if you wrote a book! Badgousk, your comment didn't help me control self!!
Sorry last night was so crap, hope you got some sleep and today is another day ( corny but true). Anything you can plan for this evening with the kids so you're in a better starting place when they go to bed?

I hope there were no casualties from your dummy gun last night, Wind, and that your kitchen has cleaned itself.

Other people's crap cluttering up your house and life is A Thing.
An awful thing.
But solvable.

Throw crap out.
Give crap to charity (well, usable crap, you know what i mean).
Put other people's crap on their beds/their space.
Make an announcement that unsolicited crap from the Other People in your life will go in a. the bin or b. a laundry basket or similar receptacle where they may chose to rummage if they are looking for something. Said basket will get emptied (in the bin!) at the end of every month so anything unclaimed will NO LONGER GET THE CHANCE TO PISS ME YOU OFF.
And breathe.

There endeth the sermon.

Haha...I know...don't know why I said it I only have a shower 😂😂 Great to hear from you though

Oh blimey - I've learned It's nanowrimo month, starting the day the kids go back to school (after an inset day.) on Tuesday. I don't believe in fate, but that would be a tidy way to end what was a 30 day only thread.

It's hard to tell if people are trying to buoy a stranger up with the only thing they've proffered (my musings) It has literally never crossed my mind to write anything, but these booze free nights are INTERMINABLE and I have no need to succeed, so I could spend November crashing around toward 50000 words and see what happens.

I now feel mildly obliged to proofread my own streams of consciousness. I haven't and I won't :-)

Bollocks - i've proffered Jesus.

Nope, no buoying up going on whatsoever, you really do have a talent my lovely Can't hurt to give it a whirl even if all it does is pass the time and what if it does turn out to be your passion, I think you have to find out at least. Hope tonight's a better night for you.

Hello Hiding! How are you?!

I agree with Hiding, you really are talented, you've nothing to lose by trying, and it will fill your time if nothing more comes of it. When you are a famous writer please let us all know it's you!! We might still be on here chatting, who knows!

Hope is dizzying

Hello pigflew - I'm up for that. The chatting bit mainly :-)

What would you fancy writing about?

pigflew, you're so very kind. I'm not jammed to the gills with grey glue anymore - I wonder how I can reciprocate rather than blather?

Just carry on getting better, that's all you need to do, not look out for us. I think you've helped all of us on here in different ways, but that's not why we are here, we're here to support you.
I can imagine you writing a funny story but with real depth to the characters, maybe a sad side too. Having read a million books that go girl in disastrous relationship, gets dumped, either realises man under her nose was always the one for her or meets new man and they fall in love within an hour, I'm relying on you to produce something better for me to read!!