He hasn't come home

[NoCapes]

"D"P goes out a lot, I've started threads on him before, I mean he literally goes out 4/5 times a week
And he goes out every single Saturday night
He always gets in early hours of the morning and he sleeps on the couch
There's been the odd 'emergency' where he comes in at 8/9am-ish (friend was in hospital after a fight etc)
He's come in twice with make up on his t-shirt

Last night he went out and I've just got up with the baby to discover he hasn't come home
His phone is switched off

Will you all give me a shake and tell me the absolute glaringly obvious?...

Yes maybe you're right and I went through all the emotions before I actually kicked him out
There's so so much that I haven't even put here, so maybe I was just completely over it and hadn't realised

And yes Funko I suppose there is the fact that I haven't spoken to him yet, he's very much out of sight out of mind atm, maybe when I have to see him and speak to him I'll feel different

Feeling a bit drained today
Going to make some tea and listen to some of these songs

You will feel drained, you've been dealing with a poorly baby, on top of all this. It does catch up with you. Get as much rest as you can. You're doing so well.

One day at a time.

Of you do cry - it's not really for him, it's for the hopes you had of a loving relationship with the man you hoped and wished he was.

If*

Well done :-) (only just found this thread). Have ur kids still not noticed? Shows how little he had to do with them really, doesn't it. It might be worth thinking what u want to say to them, so u can say it well - and maybe talk to them before they do wonder where he is? Be prepared for them to be sad, even if they don't see him much, but reassure them that they won't be moving house or school, and that everyone is ok, and that u will always be there for them (coz having him gone may make them wonder if u could go too).
Don't let it make u feel wobbly, or sad, that u have to explain it to them, ur their mum, and ur doing what is best for you, and for them (which,as u know, is not always the most popular route!).

Think about the positive future you're building for all of you, plan treats for them to look forward to (free ones like going to the park - my favourite treat as a kid was to go watch motorway traffic from a bridge!). Take up offers of help, and ask if u need it, sounds as if ur mum loves u all to bits :-).

Kelly Clarkson rocks the moving on vibe!

And the one I blasted A LOT!!

Well, as PPs have said, if you know that you deserve better, you have been treated like shit & have done more than enough of being reasonable & trying to work it out. Then once the last drop dripped, it hit the eject button & you know in spite of having loved him, & in spite of wishing & fighting for another outcome, he is not interested, able or willing in change... Well. it may hurt, but it still makes it the right decision.

Just out of interest, Is he stroking his ego at his Mothers', or is he at some other unknown address ?

I have no idea where he is Mix
I dropped all of his stuff outside his Mums, but don't know whether he stayed there or not

As my Irish mother says. "Who gives a shite where he is".

The crash may come in the calm, once you've got a lovely routine going that crazy part of your brain might start wandering... us random Internet strangers will make you re-read this thread then cos we care more than he does

Anyway, can I add "thorn in my side" by the eurythmics to the play list? It reminds me of my ex!

Been reading, but not contributing.

But I can add one to the 'fuck you' playlist.

I'm guessing most on here won't know the singer, let along the song, but this played at volume is one of the best kick arse, fuck him songs ever. Got me through many a difficult time.

Bettye Lavette

WHEN A WOMAN'S HAD ENOUGH ....

Have followed your thread and just had to post. I could just tell you're at that 'dangerous stage', when there's a very fine line between staying in the light or slipping back into the dark side. Please know that it will pass. Please stay brave for you. Everything else will fall into place. I know.

You're amazing. No more, no less, just AMAZING!

because i've been bingewatching nashville here is my song contribution

"I am the one, that I've been waiting for"

For the days you need to find your anger

soooooo I made a spotify playlist........

open.spotify.com/user/1120101715/playlist/3W0wSG5IY9WsCjqYIaes0Q

sky that is amazing that may have just made my day

Love it!!!!!!!

I've been following you and I'm in awe of you. You have a very bright future ahead of you.
Can I just add Mary Mary - shackles

Glad to help it's helping me too

I've made it all female artists so I left off some suggestions but feel free to add more on here and I'll see if I can find them

It's still a WIP

I fucking love that playlist!!!!
Downloading it now.

Not anything to add that is helpful but wanted to say you are amazing NoCapes

Well done Capes, you are amazing

He will miss you, but tough shit, he clearly doesn't come close to deserving you & your life, like your house will be so much lighter without the burden if a disrespectful man child

I have another song for your playlist:-

Annie Lennox - Why?