not feeling OLD?....dating thread 107

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Good luck Destiny hope all goes well with the interview and the Frenchman.

Emily I think guys are accustomed to this sort of thing in the sense that they often say they have a 6 inch penis instead of a 5 inch one...so what does a couple of inches matter. It really does depend on whether this kind of stretching the truth is typical in him or not.

Thanks Lilac I can see why he's done it and to be fair at anytime I could say I don't want to see him again.
He is great company though and is the main carer for his ( now teenage and independant dcs).

So he does have qualities I admire.

I spoke to a friend about him, although before I knew about him adding an inch onto his height and the age thing.

She said would I have put her with her dh and I said no, not at all. She said that's my answer then.

emilybrontescorset If he was instantly honest about slight exaggerations on his profile I wouldn't be too bothered. It is a bit like bending the truth on your CV, it's about getting the interview so you can prove yourself and everyone does it to some degree.
I would only see them as red flags if it was one or more of the following:
a) He was not upfront about the creativity with the truth
b)There was no slight exaggeration, just an out and out lie
c)He is cagey about some things you ask about him

Wow you lot- I go away for a long weekend and then there's a new thread with 7 pages!

Off to catch up but in the meantime, new irons...

MrGeek- not my usual type but engaging and witty so see how that goes, just messaging at the mo
MrWoodsman seems spot on- decent job, articulate, good pics, easy messaging, trying to arrange coffee at the weekend already so fingers crossed.

Happy Wednesday daters!

Good luck destiny

emily I think it depends how quickly he tells you truth and how up front is from then on. It sounds like he is doing ok on that score but what a shame to have to question his honesty at such an early stage.
There have been women on this thread in the past who have shaved a few years from their ages, mainly because they were trying to attract someone other than the stream of much older men that think they are such a catch. Personally I wouldn't do it but I can understand why some people do.

Can I ask if anyone on here has dated anyone with aspergers? I have met a lovely man who appears to be on the spectrum (my son is high functioning aspie so I recognise the traits). I don't really know what I'm asking but I'm finding it very confusing and I don't know what is disinterest and what is ASD. He disappears mid conversation. Doesn't make dates that have been planned for days/weeks (does let me know on the day) but my child free time has been totally wasted this school holiday as I have kept days free for stuff that hasn't happened.
He is upset when he realises I'm pissed off and I do get the feeling he really wants to see me. The sex is incredible and we have an amazing connection. He just seems to struggle with organisation and planning. His job is very regimental so he seems to cope well there. He works away and so we can only see each other 2 weeks of the month anyway (whilst he is here for work) and he lives in so we can only meet up at mine when child free (rare) or go out somewhere.
I don't want a forever relationship with plans to move in and merge families but I would really like a boyfriend. If this guy was NT I would have binned him straight away but I do like him and he usually finds time to message etc. I'm settling for too little though aren't I? Does it get better or is this as good as it gets? I do realise that no two people with ASD are the same but I would appreciate others experiences.

Thanks for the responses everyone.
He has been very upfront about things including telling me he was once arrested on a train wearing women's clothes.

I hope you don't think om awful but I have a second date with another man tonight.
He is more straight laced so I'll see how this goes.

I dumped the guy I met who had himself down as a non smoker then proceeded to vape throughout our date. He also got my goat banging on about how the csa had crippled him. He's a no as something's I can't overlook.

Cricket 2 weeks away and you lot have moved on to a new thread and lots of new irons as well as some let downs. Will read everything later to catch up properly.

Well planeman is binned I think I mentioned this just before I went away. Whereas mrvtall has messaged and phoned most days just generally chit chat and flirting lots of laughing when we're on the phone which is just like our dates (3 of anyone remembers) where before the 3 weeks of hokidays. He's asked me to London for a night weekend near his birthday mid September to see a show...I said yes straight away have no doubts about that being ok, he's asked me to stay over this weekend and again I've said yes... oh god I hope he's as fab as I remember him though we've talked so much I feel I know him better, without the physical stuff getting involved. I know i fancied him straight away when we first met and hes very vocal in how much he wants to see me again so cross everything for this weekend.. (except my legs

emily that's not awful at all! Second date with somone or just another first date?

whatami pleased that it sounds so positive with Mrvtall- best bit about dating isn't it, the getting to know them and will we/won't we

Gosh lots of activity on here! Re lying about stuff on your profile, a few years and a few inches in height isn't so bad especially as he fessed up straightaway. I've had men lie about much worse - like marital status! 😱

Re Aspergers, I don't know much about that but someone being unreliable is not a good sign whatever the reason. And they should be making a lot more effort at the start IMO

So Frenchman was ok. Bit serious, only been on dating site for 6 weeks and I was his first date! He is looking for a proper relationship so not a playa and was honest that he was meeting someone else on Sunday. Was nice to meet someone new at this, just not sure if we share the same sense of humour? Will meet him again and see how we get on. I didn't massively fancy him, he looked a bit knackered but he was a decent professional guy.

And in other news... I got the job!!!😀😀😀😀 So happy. They rang me up at 4 to say they were really impressed with me. Such a good feeling to be wanted and have a job title and purpose and identity again.

Phew!

Brilliant news destiny Go you!!

Well done destiny!!!

Yay Destiny well done!

Great news destiny! When do you start?

I need saving from myself at the moment. I get particularly, er, frisky, when I'm ovulating and I am bang smack in the middle of my cycle (too much info I know, I know). Someone stop me from texting inappropriate stuff to my irons please, it wont do me any good in the long run even if it helps ease the pressure short term!

Sick I understand what that's like, when you feel hormonally horny! It's a v vulnerable place to be and can lead to some bad decisions...

I've had times when I've been lying in bed and desperate for that itch to be scratched. Problem is, it can lead to emotional complications!

I don't know how old you are, I'm prob older than you, but I remember being in my twenties, pre Internet and being really horny on a Sat night and wishing there was a delivery service for men, like a pizza delivery service, where a hot guy could just come to your house. However now with the internet that is completely possible...!

destiny I'm 40. And so bloody horny this week!

I was restrained though, damn it all.

waving it's easy with hindsight to say "I should have spotted it" but don't be hard on yourself, you weren't the asshole. X

Rosetta are you sure your date isn't using'organisational issues' as a way to manipulate when you meet? (So he's free to drop dates as it suits him?)

Destiny well done.

Waving it sounds like you had a bad run-in with a major liar. Why people seriously lie still confuses me, (my STBXH was big liar), it doesn't build foundations for anything good and always backfires. His loss and your great escape

Sick I feel horny lots all the time as dry spell for months so making up to do and know I should talk about lots of things with Mr Walker but get distracted thinking about moose burgers. We shared them once and had great time, but spent lots of time walking since so no moose burgers in public space despite me thinking about it.

I've planned a -an extremely long- weekend break with my hot as fuck fifties chap. I've come on my fucking period today!! I feel like cheerleading - Come on uterus, no baby here, awesome cock available, squidge it out faster! Bugger.

Had my second date with more straight laced man( who isn't that straight laced ). Went extremely well. Planned a 3rd date.

Wontlet I know periods come up at the least convenient times! have you considered having fun in the shower, as a backup plan?

Boo so what wasn't straight-laced about him?

Congratulations Destiny! Bloody well done.

Waving to be honest, that wouldn't bother me. He's playing the OLD game and at least he confessed.

Robots Why not use a sponge tampon? They can be used during your period and the man won't notice. I read about them on here and got some so I wouldn't miss an opportunity to enjoy AudiDriver.

Boo Tell us more!