not feeling OLD?....dating thread 107

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Will he know it's run out? I'm guessing so

Yes Claw he will because he won't be able to send proper messages.

Thank you! Hopefully he'll sort it out before Monday night. We'd agreed on a place to meet but the timing was a bit up in the air. Not sure I really want to book a babysitter and set off if I don't hear anymore.

Well I sent your response to Mr hesitant and I got a very apologetic reply straight back and asking me for lunch tomorrow. So thank you ( I guess- perhaps I should wait to see how the date goes!)

Claw if a potential date said to me he'd be unsure as I have DCs I'd avoid.

As you said, does he want you to beg?(Please I'm a mum I'd do anything for moose burgers).

Or does he want you to say that you won't bring DCs anywhere near him and can easily get rid as he'd be top priority?

Wharever reason it's weird to write that when you're trying to ask for a date. I don't think I'd even reply.

I started to write to a bloke on POF that seemed really chatty. He ticked that he had DCs. I casually mentioned mine, as in I didn't have them that day, and his replies dropped to very few words and no further questions to me. So I completely stopped. More fish in the sea!

I think I have the kiss of death today! People I have been chatting to have just suddenly disapeared since yesterday and I cant decide whether they have blocked me or they have been deleted! Either way its annoying and i'm starting to think I am imagining these conversations.

Also I cant seem to scroll back up on conversations on pof as I need to check sometimes who I have told what to - the problems of holding too many conversations! I think I am fairly computer literate but this is confounding me.

I have a lunchtime date for later in the week but no name for him yet - I hope he realises how tall I am as I dont think he is very tall!

Oh dear lilac, I agreed to a date with him! He suggested lunch but I have a rare child free day tomorrow and have a few things I want to do for myself so have suggested coffee.

I also thought it weird about him mentioning the kids. I wondered if it was because he thinks I'm looking for a replacement dad for them, I don't know. Or as you say, I'd be desperate for moose burgers ( well I am but I'm going to keep that under wraps!). He was very apologetic and said he wasn't sure how much child free time I would have and whether logistics and childcare would work etc etc. Still a bit odd. Oh well, he's very local and a coffee tomorrow won't take up much time and I don't have to pay for a sitter at least.

Claw he sounds like he wants you to make promises to be flexible to fit his needs.

If he likes you, he'll have to work around you. You can't hide DCs away at short notice, so he'll need to accept that forward planning is needed.

Enjoy the drink and have some lovely

I am on the brink of old, I'm scared as i haven't actually set up profile (just logged on as mary) but I have been a wee bit shocked as to the amount of guys who are in my age group - but look like old men? I have no idea how to do old, I need to set up a proper profile...I need help!!!

Hi everyone - I've been AWOL for a bit - OLD was getting me down a bit - lots of meh conversations with meh blokes.
Everyone seems to having lots of dates on here
Clawdeen I'd say go for the coffee but have your bullshit radar switched up to max !

I had a date today - seemed to go well - had coffee and spent 3 hours playing Pokemon Go I think I like him but he's another bloody shortie - I'm really tall so it matters a bit. Going out for dinner this week though,so we'll see!

Also found a friend's husband on Tinder

Fanny start with honest and brief. You can always delete it if you're not happy with it. Don't feel like you have to respond to all men writing to you and expect over 50% to be weirdos. Read the rules at the start of this thread.

Sky that's awful, did you tell your friend?

claw I wouldn't go near anyone who had some uncertainty due to me having kids. Kids are time-consuming, demanding, emotional, can cause plans to be cancelled at short notice etc. It's a lot to put up with in a relationship, and if someone is doubtful about it at the start, they're only going to get worse when reality hits.

Lilac I've told a mutual friend who knows them much better - she's going to have a chat with him. Fuck.

sky what an awful discovery. You must have felt sick. Glad your date went well though. I'm also tall. So far my only OLD was with a guy much much shorter. He was lovely and we had a lot in common but I really had to bend to kiss him and when I put my arms around him, it felt like hugging a child. Such a shame.

I have my bullshit radar firmly switched on. I'm in a bit of a grump anyway due to lack of sleep and I also had to bin my FWB last week because he was being such an arrogant twat. I'm feeling very anti men which is probably not the most helpful attitude for a date!!

minty and lilac you're both right. Kids are emotional, demanding and hard work. My eldest is also having a lot of issues at the moment and is anxious if I am out a lot. Probably not very attractive to someone with no kids at all.

I had a sudden panic first thing. mr hesitant is very local so we're going to meet in a cafe nearby. My recently ex-FWB lives on the road behind me, as does the short guy I dated from Soulmates. I had this sudden vision of all 3 men having a lazy Sunday coffee in the cafe!!

Hi all! Need some quick advice. Been intensively dating again but on the search for the one after bad relationships. I'm not very assertive, and need to tell a guy, who seems a tender soul, that I don't want to see hom again. So I just cancelled our date tomorrow, and he's asking why!?! I have only seen him two times! Do I owe him an explanation?

Claw I had someone who seemed overly concerned about ne having kids, kept asking 'how will we find time and privacy with your kids around' (this was before we had met, in fact in the first few messages). Turns out he was still living with his ex (although split up)

Outnumbrd you could say that you didn't feel that you were compatible and that you couldn't see a future with him, or that you he was a lovely guy but you didn't think there was much chemistry between you?

outnumbrd oh it's such a horrible feeling isn't it letting someone down. I spent all day trying to compose a text to Mr Small who was such a sweetie. I even googled for tips. In the end I texted ' I did have a lot of fun last night and really enjoyed chatting to you but sadly I don't feel enough of a connection between us to move things forward. I'm very sorry about that as you seem a great guy.'. He sent a very lovely reply but I felt awful. It's true you don't owe him an explanation but I would probably want one if the situation was reversed. Also in my case, he lives very close so am bound to bump into him so wanted to as least awkward as possible.

Oh goodness- hadn't even thought about the married aspect! I am so naive and new to dating. Right added that possibility to my twat radar!

OK I wish I could just stop thinking about yest postponed date as I'm beginning to have my doubts now......he has not got in touch to reorganise new date.

Bugging me that he should have just cancelled me.....not postponed until the next day if he didn't mean it.

Ferociously clicking through men online to take my mind off

Claw....I think he might just be sweet.... It's difficult for anyone to know what to say and equally its not something anyone wants to ignore.

Eeek321 were you meant to be meeting today for definite? If so it's pretty poor that he hasnt been in touch yet. Hope he gets in touch soon, as you say if he'd changed his mind he could have just told you yesterday and saved you hanging around waiting!

Very annoying!

Hello all, can I join in?

So I went on my very first tinder date with a lovely French man on Friday. Stupidly I made a school boy error in barely eating that day so the few glasses of wine I had went straight to my head, I spoke far too much and spilt half a glass down him . Aside from that it was a very good night, we spoke and laughed for hours. He did kiss me at the end (I now understand why it's called French kissing!) and he mentioned me going down his neck of the woods for our next date. However, I've not heard from him since, wondering if I should bite the bullet and message him?

I think its quite soon to worry about the French guy itcuddles. Sure you can text but I'd leave it a few days. I know exactly how you're feeling - the uncertainty is horrid - but I'd give him space to get back to you in his own time.

BTW re earlier chats - I personally wouldn't bother with a guy without kids who made an issue about me having kids. They are my number one priority so I'm just not available as a footloose and fancy free man. Even a guy with kids will tend to have more free time than me so has to be understanding about my lack of flexibility and the fact I have lots of friends I want to see too. They just need to be able to get my lifestyle and accept it - I'm not going to apologise for it. I don't want anyone complaining or being frustrated by my lack of flexibility.

Though as my kids are now teenagers I can do more and it does get easier. Well being free to do things does - online dating is as annoying as ever. I'm just better at keeping a relaxed head about it and not to let them get under my skin. I'm the one choosing now.

Hi all

Wave I've always had body image issues and worried about not having anything enough to grab up top. With moose burgers other day I decided not to worry and think men prefer what happens rather than what they see, and they have insecurities. So you post away with your photos and as if a date is lucky enough to get you naked he should appreciate the opportunity!

I thought if my new man runs fine, I'm not changing. Anyhow he's still in contact so he's an iron. I'm going to call him mr walker as we've spent most of the time going on walks.

Itcuddles I'd give him a bit longer, but not much longer. Prob until tomorrow morning then move on. It doesn't sound very good if he can't send even a quick text.

Eeek Something's holding him back if he had agreed to contact you today as most people can fit a text in at some point. Hopefully he'll have a good reason.

I won't message him, if he's interested he'll be back if not it's not a loss. We didn't text much beforehand anyway so it's not like we've gone from loads of communication to none.
I really do hate the games we have to play early on in dating, I don't want to hide my interest just to not appear as a keen bean!

Waving good on you uploading the bikini pics! I think we're all guilty of using pictures at the more flattering angles, I know I am, but I've not had any complaints so far. I always shove a couple more realistic ones at the end just so they can't feel too deceived