not feeling OLD?....dating thread 107

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

claw I just used a version of my own name and I use a generic profile pic. You can chose the pictures that you have on tinder so you are not stuck with a cartoon lion or whatever on your Tinder profile

sorting I think you just have to go with your gut. You don't have to decide until you are ready to talk exclusivity with one of them. Says me who only dates one at a time! Hypothetically, if your doorbell rang now who, if any would you be most pleased to see?

Goodness! All of them! What does that make me?!

I don't think I'll bother with a second date, I want it to be fun not to feel like a chore.

I had a new match on tinder this morning and he seems nice, have already exchanged numbers!

One of my other irons offered to come round and help me finish decorating tonight while I'm child free but I declined, not met him yet.

I'm talking to one I quite like on POF but he doesn't want a relationship, and whilst I don't want a full blown relationship from the off I do want it to move in that direction, but slowly! I'm tempted just to see him for sex which would be a first.

sorting how far into it with each of them are you? Can you not give yourself longer to choose?

sorting I would say that makes you in a very good place indeed!

I hope the hangover is wearing off waving it's hard enough to get your head around this OLD malarkey when it's clear!

Hope hsngivers fading fast. Ikwym about adjusting to not being with someone, Waving, I feel danger of plugging the gap rarher than rhe right plug! Need to learn to be content alone.

But, but... Yes, nice dilemma but feel in a fix, Mr Eligible a real catch regardless of whether i am ready now, not ten a penny and more to the point, really like him! But Mr Tall attractive and clever and intriguing.. Had 2 dates with him and 4 with Mr Eligible. Mr Dangerous is def back burner..

Waving it sounds like your exbf is still on your mind. Have you spent enough time talking about what happened in RL to grieve that relationship?

I think it can be hard to lose a boyfriend because there's the excitement of this is going to be different.

I saw Mr Walker and we had some serious conversations through the date. I can see that the sarcasm was part tiredness but also that the relationship has moved too quickly in some areas so we're both blowing 'hot and cold' ok moose burgers could have waited until we knew each other more. We've now had a proper 'we're exclusive' talk and understand each other more.

I'm embarassed to say that I'm not used to being in an equal relationship and I'm struggling with him listening to me. How weird is that?

I'm surprised all the time at his honesty. Coming home I started to cry when I realised I could really like him. I think I have a lot more psychological baggage then him.

Sorry for the negativity, I just can't say it in RL as my of my friends heard lots about my ex so I feel like I should be happy now.

Yea RL convos sometimes brst avoided sonetimes. And prople judge as well as godsip!

How long's if been, Lilac w Mr Walker?

Lilac, please take one day at the time and accept that you can be happy. I'm so glad for you!

Aww lilac that sounds fab, really pleased for you, and it sounds like you 2 are really good at communicating which is fab.

waving you're on a really similar timeline to me with exbf, if I'm honest I know I'm not over mine but through talking to people OLD I can see that I will be ok etc. We'll be fine!

The tinder match I had this morning seemed really good, he asked to exchange numbers, he whatsapped straight away, then he jokingly suggested making the most of my child free night, he'd come round for a brew, I declined but made it clear I'd be up for a drink or something and now he's gone all silent aargh he seemed nice!

I am going to read through this thread properly with a hot chocolate before I go to sleep. I love seeing how everyone's getting on.

I've had a bit of break from old. I started to feel fed up with it and I was feeling a bit bleurgh. I've got no irons at the moment. One messages me a lot but I think he sees me as a counsellor more than a potential date,

But I'm going to get back on it. I bought a nice red jump suit yesterday that makes me feel
Confident so need to get a date.

Well, 'weird and sew mad' iron after dozens of messages last night until 1.30 am left me another one today asking me if I was free....and now he knows my surname. I have no idea how he found it; it's not on the OLD site and I certainly never gave it to him. Of course, he can find me on internet now, my address, etc. Oh dear.

We'll have to see if he continues to pester me...

On a positive note (I wasn't expecting this at all) I've got a new iron who I should be meeting up with next Saturday. He lives about an hour away, is my age and seems nice. He's respecting my desire NOT to meet up at his place or mine and has, until now (note the caution here after last night's experience) been respectful. The only thing is that I'm finding him quite enthusiastic... oh dear. I'm so used to waiting and waiting for news from men that I'm not used to overt puppy dog happiness.

Is it a foregone conclusion on this thread that numerous messages from the word go is a bad sign?

Oops, I meant to write 'weird and sex mad'! Sorry.

Waving it sounds like your relationship wasn't resolved, but I can't talk as getting closer to someone new is triggering issues for me. Writing on here is good though, it gets it out somewhere.

Sorting Mr Walker and I first started texting each other around 3.5-4 weeks ago. We text every day, but normal stuff and neither of us expects instant replies. We have met twice a week. So it is early days. I wonder when it stops being early days though - then it's middle days?

This thanks, you're right I'm over thinking and should stop and enjoy this.

I completely understand your overthinking Lilac. Sometimes we just can't help ourselves.

Him newbie here. Recently separated from my dh and started looking online. Didn't want anything serious. But I need a slap round the chops as have been sucked in by a guy I know is a time waster. We messaged for a few weeks then exchanged numbers but he would never phone me or only phone at odd times. He is adamant he is single and I do believe this as he appears to live a very "student" lifestyle depute being in his 30s.
Anyway he eventually ghosted me after I told him I was not happy with his behaviour. Never actually met btw-he cancelled the one time we arranged it. However while checking my emails on Friday I notice he has messaged me. Idiot that I am I replied! And now am back in same situation-were supposed to meet sat but he cancelled (had forgot he was meeting his sister) but then when I messaged him later he said that had fallen through so why not pick up the phone then?
I know the answer but can't stop being sucked in.help!

waving yes we were together 5 months, had made lots of plans to introduce him to my kids when he got back from deployment when suddenly he decided actually he doesn't want to ever be a father figure in my children's lives, obviously wasn't on the cards for a long time anyway but basically he didn't see a future, he'd declared undying love, sent flowers, gifts, taken me on amazing weekends away the lot, he was forever blowing hot and cold though.

Right my tinder match came back suggesting a quick drink locally and since I'm child free and won't be again for another week or so I'm going to go, not sure if it's a bit too available but I can't be bothered playing games, I'd rather know if there's anything in it.

Good luck, No. Vintsge - don't take it personally, several irons a good strategy then don't get too involved. Ive just had a "best not contact each other any more" from Mr Dangerous, I've either offended him by teasing him for bring a player of he's too busy w his own irons. Never mind. He Was back burner option. Know it sounds callous but serms to be how people play it.