not feeling OLD?....dating thread 107

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Thanks Kiki. I have lots of meet me requests but I feel like if they are really interested then they would bother messaging, right?

Waving I have not used Tinder yet so not familiar with it. So you can't see things like people's height etc? Hmm, difficult as I am tall'ish and I would prefer guy to be taller than me! But how to ask..?

Do looks matter? I'm swiping guys who I don't particularly fancy now in the hope of being more succesful!

I just ask how tall they are I don't think it's an offensive question tbh.

Wrt paying on pof.... I always think the ones who pay look a bit desperate (sorry!) all you get is to see who says they'll meet you and to see if people have read your messages , which seems a bit stalker ish to me! I always avoid the ones with the yellow premium membership dot in their profile and I know other who do too ( again I'm sorry!)

I think it depends on what you are into looks wise, if looks don't bother you then obviously swipe away and get to know people but I only swipe right for the ones who's pictures I see and I think" yep!"

I know! Looks are really important to me! But all the ones I've met are not long term prospects! So thinking of going for a less attractive but maybe more thoughtful, loving one!

I think maybe that's a myth though, just because someone's not classically good looking it doesn't mean they will be thoughtful kind and loving!

Thanks again Kiki! So they cannot see if I have read their message unless they've paid for the upgrade? Obviously same goes for me if I send anyone a message (ie I won't know if they've read it or not)

Outnmbrd Without sounding too fickle the looks do matter to me too. (And I am not looking for a Brad Pitt - the beauty is in the eye of the beholder!) Or at least they have to have something on their profile that catches my attention. I know my friends say that I should be open minded but I do find it difficult..!

Thanks again Kiki! So they cannot see if I have read their message unless they've paid for the upgrade? Obviously same goes for me if I send anyone a message (ie I won't know if they've read it or not)

Outnmbrd Without sounding too fickle the looks do matter to me too. (And I am not looking for a Brad Pitt - the beauty is in the eye of the beholder!) Or at least they have to have something on their profile that catches my attention. I know my friends say that I should be open minded but I do find it difficult..!

Been following this thread for a while. Is it just me, or are men from tinder especially flaky?

For the second time, I've been chatting with a guy, getting on really well and feeling like it could be going somewhere. He asked for more photos (as he's apparently been catfished before ) so I linked him to my Instagram. He then went silent and unmatched me.

It's left me feeling a bit despondent. Am I that ugly that these people no longer want to talk when they see more photos of me? I hate the way they have so much choice that they just treat people like crap and disappear. Without any reason. I wouldn't mind but it keeps happening and I'm feeling like giving up.

Bonjournono- that's sounds awful, what a dick to go silent on you!

Honestly though, are your pics on tinder different to the ones on your social media profiles? If it happened once I'd think it was their problem but for it to happen several times sounds like maybe you have your best pics on tinder ( understandable) and then when they see the real you it's not the same? I'm only trying to think why it would happen, apologies if I'm wrong! Maybe put a mix of photos that show you in different angles and full length/face pics, that way you know they're not just going on one type of picture.

I might be wrong and you've done that anyway!

Tbh I've been doing old for about a year on and off and I've had guys go quiet on me and it could be for any number of reasons!

Just in from an amazing evening with mrvtall despite me saying we wouldnt be doing anything but chatting tonight and catching up. That went out the window as soon as I saw him. So few drinks in a bar then back to his, managed half a glass of wine before we ended up in bed. Who was it on here told me blind guys were great lovers? You were right

Kiki, I thought that could be it but I only have about 3 photos of myself on Instagram (similar to the tinder pics) and the rest are things to do with my interests/ daily life. It just doesn't make sense but he obviously saw something he didn't like. I'm usually quite thick skinned but I'm feeling a bit fragile at the moment. I suppose nobody likes to be rejected but we seemed to have so much in common.

what I must have missed your earlier posts about Mr Vtall. Is he blind? Where did you find him? And fantastic news, keep us posted!!

bonjour that's strange, maybe he's married, (this is my default setting now for any weird behaviour, in fact at least 2 of my irons I'm now thinking are married!)

As for looks, it is really important that I fancy the guy , my taste which is not really classically handsome, but good fit body and tall. But I look at my friends who are in happy relationships with unattractive guys but who care about them! I've never had anyone who actually gave a shit about me!

Just seen someones profile saying they are looking for someone up for shits n giggles

Its hard to know what to do about the attractiveness thing I do feel like I can find someone attractive if they make me laugh etc and have a nice personality and that's why I'm meeting one of my irons again today for lunch after a dog walk together on Wednesday - however an acquantince (sp?) saw us together on the dog walk and said to my friend he looked old enough to be my dad - he's the same age as me! That has put me off a bit but thats fairly shallow isn't it? He texts, is chatty without being pushy or needy but not sure if I fancy him.

Other guy I met for a coffee on Thursday definitely did look old enough to be my dad - he was 10 years older told me how tactile he was and how he loved snogging and kissed me and I was too damm polite to push him off - need to get harder with these people - texted when I got back and told him no romantic spark for me.

Why is it the only one I really felt attracted to was mr over needy who I had to bin as he told me he loved me after two dates - he's messaged me again on pof - i will have to be strong and not reply even tho I am feeling rather frustrated and sure he would be up for it - my friends would disown me tho!

4 weeks I've been on pof and it feels like a lot longer! I tenatively put my photo up on match but still not sure about paying - has anyone tried zoosk as well?

Bonjour I think they were probably married or had a girlfriend then, maybe joined to see what the deal was, got talking to you then thought "shit!" and did a runner.

bonjour the rules at the start of this thread really help- no. 6 and 7 for sure!

Had a lovely telephone date with MrWoodsman last night. Weekend coffee won't be happening because of childcare for us both but at least I know we do the same weekends! So trying for Thursday instead. He's funny and thoughful and flirty- looks good.

I like chatting on the phone first because i'll know if i fancy them or not by the time we get to a date- I need to click with someones brain before I fancy them, looks are just a bonus- and so if we've talked it doesnt matter too much what they look like! Although I've not had any horrible surprises yet

MrGeek is a bit needy I think. Plus I've received lots of pictures of him in his pants which sadly do nothing for me at all! The pants or the contents thereof. So will be winding that one down I think.

Still thinking about mrwelshboy a lot though. Hot as. Really made my brain go into overdrive- but perhaps that is a warning as per the buddhist theory upthread!

Sick, MrWoodsman definitely sounds the best in your list.

MrGeek sending pants photos sounds odd. Perhaps it's worked in the past for him. What did you say when he sent the first one?

Bonjour I've recently watched some Amy Young videos on YouTube (as recommended by waves) she has one about not worrying if men don't get back in contact. Basically, he wasn't the right man for you so you're free to meet more men and as others have pointed out may be married.

waving no we've not met up yet. Can't bloody wait til Thursday now but it's so dependent on my diary- working/dropping children off at grandparents for the weekend/ people coming to mine as I'm away for the weekend too- so I really hope the time I've scheduled in for him actually becomes free!

This will always be a problem with anyone as I have the dc for 12 days straight with no break and v little opportunity for babysitters as I live in the middle of nowhere. So my weekends off are v v precious and I have so much to fit in, I did say "dating but nothing serious" on my pof profile but I am now wondering whether even that was too ambitious :(

Enjoy your telephone date- I love being able to talk to people before I meet up with them. Get to know them a bit without the awkwardness of a first date- and when we finally do meet up it's nowhere near as clunky!

Well finally on my way home from my 24 hr date with MrPoshwriter!

So he picked me up from the station
Took me to 2 of his fave bars
Cooked me a 3 course meal and had bought 2 bottles of Prosecco to celebrate my job
Was so keen for me to watch Breaking Bad he gave me his Netflix code!

Does this mean he likes me..?

( oh and moose burgers were definitely on the menu...) 😀😀💜😈

Wow Destiny That's brilliant! How was it? give us all the details!

Bad luck Waving What does he mean by "may be available?" Surely he either is or he isnt.

Well, I had moose bugers with Audidriver last night and it was amazing. Headboard banging, sweating, the works. He's still training and getting fitter by the day and my word - you can tell. He could crack walnuts with his thighs! He also invited me to a big event and asked if he could stay over sometimes too as he'd like to spend more time with me which is nice so i said yes. God, i really like him. Such a shame he's so young.

Not heard anything from IT Man so i think we're destined never to meet.