Anyone up? DH is leaving me follow up thread. Onit's on it!!

[onitlikeacarbonnet]

Link to my last thread.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2658829-Anyone-up-DH-is-leaving-me?msgid=62446916

For the kitchen, could you take the doors off & put a curtain temporarily?

thyme2.typepad.com/.a/6a00d8341c7f3553ef011570d9485b970b-pi

That's quite nice Mix!
Not sure me and my 2 could keep it nice though. Messy pups, all of us

I have started a list of "need to do" and "nice to do"
First priority is getting the dcs rooms decorated how they'd like.
We've a school holiday Monday and Tuesday this week so not a huge amount of time to get walls stripped and painting done in either room.

Try the Jewellery Quarter in Birmingham or Hatton Garden in London. I sold some gold jewellery a few years back and shops in these two places were offering the highest price per ounze of gold - sorry though I can't remember the exact names. A search online will help. Don't bother with the high street pawn brokers they will rip you off big time. Not sure about the diamonds either but try lots of places, don't settle for £400. Good luck.

You could find a jeweller that sells 2nd hand jewellery - you might get a bett price x

I have read your threads, and you really are testimony to how strong the human spirit can be.

You can get cheap second hand kitchens on ebay- have a look you will be amazed at the bargains to be had.

I also second selling jewellery in 'posh' places. I got the best price offered in Burlington Arcade in London.

Just checking in to see how you are onit?

Hi Nigel
Wish I was doing better.
DC have been away for a couple of days with LCB. Didn't have time to miss them but I did, so much.
My mil brought them back this morning. We're currently watching home alone
I'm having wobbles all over the place. I have a new washing machine I can't use as, in the process of connecting it up, I noticed that the machine waste pipe is not actually connected to the sink waste
The 2 pipes are different sizes and the previous tenant/owner just had them propped up from underneath with a piece of chipboard. The top one just sitting on the bottom one. It looked ok but obviously was set up to look that way.
I put my machine on and had to sit holding the pipes together for half an hour while it drained. It flooded the cupboard and my floor. I was soaked.
I've had my bil, my friends dh and my ndn all come and suck teeth at it, I've gone to b&q where the guy was lovely but gave me a piece which doesn't work.
I guess I'll go back to b&q tomorrow when the DC are back at school but I'm so deflated. I hate being skint.
The unit under the sink is rotten from previous leaks/flooding. God knows what the floors like under that. And I've got no means of being able to sort it.
I'm waiting for bedtime to lose it.

What a nightmare onit. I am sure you will get it fixed and rise up again. Tomorrow is another day. I hope you are having a fat glass of wine and putting your feet up.

I am still reeling by the speed your life has completely turned around. Be kind to yourself, you've been through a hell of a lot.

The only way is up.

Just for a laugh, I live in the Boonies, we have a septic tank, no main drains.
My washing machine's waste pipe goes into a hose pipe, out of the shed & drains in a soak away... (How big is your garden ? :o)

Oh FFS! That would try anyone. Sorry Onit...I can see why that would floor you on top of everything else.
In times of crisis I show found it helps to formulate a bullet point plan (in my head mostly, but sometimes an actual list) of what I'm going to do first, then second etc...because if I stick to my list it will stop me panicking and breaking down.
So sort kids, go B and Q, potentially call plumber, locate local laundrette/call friends to organise 'borrowing' their washing machines till yours is fixed...
I dunno-might help.
You have done brilliantly Onit-I wish I was nearer-I would do your laundry and pour you some gin.chin up my love.

List is written nigel
I had thought of just sticking the hose in a bucket mix still might if I can't find the part today.

LCB sent me an email yesterday too. I swear it makes my blood run cold. Literally.
He's given me 10 full days to get settled in and now he wants the cars sold, the maintenance payments reviewed, his half of the conveyancing bills settled, joint account closed, pension stuff sorted.
I guess I want all that over with too but ffs I've just moved fucking house you fucking heartless fucking dick!!!!

I haven't even opened the boxes that have the info he wants.
And the conveyancing stuff is a joke. It was his house too. All correspondence went to both of us. He's asking to see a bill I haven't even got yet, which he should know because he hasn't got it either.
I got an estimate which I believe he wasn't sent, the week before completing. I showed him it. And suggested in reply to his email last night that if he wants that information he should ask the solicitor for it. I wanted to suggest that perhaps if he'd actually participated in the process of selling his house he might not have been left out of the last bit of it (which shows him how much money he's made )
I've also suggested he take care of selling the cars. But he needs to do it in such a way that I'm not left without transportation.

I fucking hate this horrible, callous, petty, bitter little man. How I ever let him touch me; God, it makes my skin crawl,

I loathe him and I haven't even met him.
He can wait until you are settled for you to sort out the things on his list.Im raging for you.

What a knob he is. He's feeling his lack of control again so trying to exert it.

Why do both cars have to be sold? Are you dividing the money up from both sales 50/50? Would it be easier for you for each of you to just keep one?

Can you hook the outlet pipe directly over your sink for the time being? I rmember people doing that in the 70s when automatic washing machines were a new thing.

Unbelievable TWAT.

I hate him on your behalf. What a complete arse.

I think the only reply is
"You left me for another woman, you have left me in penury, you have seen to it that I moved within minutes of an earth moving trauma.
You do not get the right badger & harass me.
I owe you nothing, the paperwork will get done.
When I am ready
Fuck right off & when you get here, fuck off again."

Forward his emails to his parents, I bet his mother will have singing to say.

What a twat he is!

I think you should go with both of the above suggestions onit.

I have followed your thread for a while on it - just wanted to say how brilliant you have done. What a vile horrible man. Are they all complete arseholes eventually ?!?! Well done though for getting on with it all and putting your kids first - you really are a true inspiration xxx

I fixed my pipe with a trip to the plumbers merchants and £3.67
However there is another leak which is potentially worse as its further down the sink waste and not accessible as the leaking joint is right over the hole cut into the side of the cupboard.

I'm annoyed because I was so proud of myself for fixing the damn thing

On a much, much more positive note, I had a call this afternoon from my conveyancing solicitor.
Apparently there was a miscalculation on the estimated bill. They had the sale price of our house as 190k when it was actually 199k.
I'd had to part with nearly 8k to make up the balance of my purchase price which was about double what if expected.
However, the miscalculation means that I'll get that back. And a little more besides.
It's possible I can get my kitchen after all.
I should be delighted but I'm feeling a little subdued. Part of me thinks I was prepared to live with it so maybe I should. I should put the money back in my savings and keep it for a real emergency.
Or spend the extra bit only but use it to replace the ancient back boiler which will save me money in the long term.
I'm torn.

You haven't got it yet. you'll have time to consider.
Look at getting a kitchen on eBay & maybe consider the back boiler, they are so efficient, & will keep you all warm in winter.

Don't tell Dickhead

The solicitor called me first because it's technically to do with my purchase so nothing to do with the LCB.
He was checking with me to see what I wanted to do with the extra bit.
I guess in a few months I'll be applying for a mortgage anyway and LCB will get it back then but, until then, fuck him. His choices have left us both poor. Difference is hell only be poor till January. I'm poor potentially for the rest of my life.

I'm proud of you for fixing it too!
That's good re your money back... You know what? Why not save half, spend half? That way you have given yourself something to fall back on but also done something you want to do.
I got a big ish tax rebate yesterday... I was really pleased at first as I thought-that's Christmas sorted and maybe I can buy the big home item I need at the minute but which I can do without a bit longer.Then I started to think-but maybe ill need it for an emergency and should just save it...and then I felt a bit crap too-so I'm going Half and half because if you live life waiting for an emergency to happen you will never get any pleasure out of anything.Thats my logic anyway!