Tinder Temptresses Unite....It's Dating Thread 106

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

I thought that I should actually chime in with my OLD history as although I have asked for and given advice on here I have not really disclosed too much. That is rather unfair of me so here is a quick overview/history of the ones I have actually met with:

My first foray into an On-Line Dating date was MissAngle - Really nice, great to chat online with and we had a fair amount in common, but when we met she was not really like her photos. Let's just say the photos were very clever angles and a few lbs ago. She was really nice in person but the difference in appearance coupled with a very high squeeky voice was not really doing it for me. I went on a second date to make sure as she was really nice online but I just couldn't get past the voice. (2 dates)
Next I managed to score a date with MissDistance - Really nice! Tall, Redhead, same interests and views, pretty much ideal (though maybe a little too similar to me to challenge me enough)! Unfortunately she had a job interview just before starting to chat to me, she later got offered the job and took it (350 miles away!). So we had a great few weeks of non committed fun until she moved away! We both agreed it could never go anywhere though which was a real shame. (4 or 5 dates)
As departure date was looming I went back online and discovered MissBlog - What can I say, it just didn't work out (3 dates)
I also discovered MissLocal - Really nice, tall, slim, blonde, similar interests and grew up in the next town to where I grew up (250 miles from where we now live). Did have more than a few issues with her ex though and had 3 kids so wasn't easy to meet. We spoke loads online, met once and had a great time. The whole thing got called short when she had news of potential cancer and couldn't face a relationship with that going on. (1 date)
Just as I was about to give up on it all though I met up with my one and only PoF date MissAwsome - Just wow! She is tall, elegant, clever, witty, likes camping, likes cycling, drinks whisky, bit of a foodie, great with children (it's her job so CRB checked too ) but doesn't have children, doesn't have any existing ex issues. Only issue is that she does move fast, though as she is happy to be checked on this it's not actually an issue. Though on a later post I may just clarify on the speed to get an outside perspective. (22 dates and counting)

You got a relationship after only 5 dates? Wow that's amazing! Guess you don't get the endless hi sexy how r u, dross we women do!

Curious to know how old you are as I think it gets more difficult the older you get.

My biggest problem is men my age either want women much younger than themselves, are divorced and want to play the field, have kids and not much availability ( or a combination of the above ), or they're still single for a good reason!

Amen Destinysdaughter, same here but in the real world. Was hoping to find relationship material online...

Just been chatting with an Italian guy who claims to be an Osteopath. Rate my luck is going, he's probably a pizza delivery guy who did a weekend massage course once..!

Hahahaha 😀😱😈

Destinysdaughter
If his 2 day massage course was any good you may get a nice pizza AND a neck rub out of it?

But seriously how do I tell if this guy is who he says he is? He could genuinely be an osteopath but as English isn't his first language, it's hard to know his level of education. If it wasn't I think I might be able to suss him out.

Any ideas...?

OLD has made me so sceptical of men!

Sorry for the self indulgent post. I haven't been on for a while. I'll go back and read all the updates.

Old has made me really paranoid about being short?!? I'm 5'3 and although I know I'm short I've never felt it an issue now it is

The other thing I'm finding strange is when someone makes an effort chatting a lot and then says they only want sex. Why put the effort in?? Is it that they're chatting away and then realise I'm short and think well I'll jjg her but nothing else.

Old makes you mind mushy ha

I think a lot of guys are on OLD just for sex, don't think your height has got anything to do with it. You're not that short, quite average for a British woman I think.

I thought guys liked a smaller women. I'm 5'7 n find a lot of guys my size message me... just no!

Thanks for that insight recycled nice to see how males view dates etc

I too am a bit impatient n fast moving n Fireman is very chilled n easygoing which is why I'm getting frustrated. We've had 5 dates now n DTD

Destinysdaughter I am 40 and it may have been within only a few physical dates but it was months and months of online interaction with them (and so many others for the online part) before then too

motheroreily
I wouldn't worry about what others see as an issue, as it is just their issue. Every one had a type and it just comes across more overtly online. Some people prefer tall, others short, others average and some don't care. These issues in real life would never get noticed because you can see visually and move on or not, in an online arena people have to ask and be open. Don't take offence (and I think 5'3" is average, not short btw) as it's better to get deal breakers out the way early rather than later.
As for men putting the effort in for just sex, I really don't know but if they are putting that much effort in then maybe they want more even if they aren't admitting it to themselves? Either that or it's just become a very hard market out there and they need to sell themselves better

sparklesnpearls because things with MissAwesome are moving so fast and beginning to get really comfortable that I have to keep checking myself to stop myself becoming complacent with it. Fireman may just be not checking himself and need a nudge, I could be wrong but a nudge can't hurt.

Destinysdaughter
You could check his credentials at www.osteopathy.org.uk/register-search/

Ha thanks! I would need a full name for that tho. Don't think 'Marco' from the Midlands is gonna cut it somehow...

Here's a 🍺 for trying tho!

If you have a more accurate location this might help
findanosteopath.co.uk/search/browse.asp?l=&loc=&sCrit=listAll

Recycledparent yes I gave him a nudge other day told him that I didn't wanna play games n if he wasn't fussed to call it a day his response was he liked me n wasn't playing games..but yet he's messages me about 3 times a day now but yet is on whatsapp every 20 mins

Recycledparent yes I gave him a nudge other day told him that I didn't wanna play games n if he wasn't fussed to call it a day his response was he liked me n wasn't playing games..but yet he's messages me about 3 times a day now but yet is on whatsapp every 20 mins

I've just left it now, if he messages I'm friendly but I've already moved on I think...

Hi Waving! I saw your other thread and I really felt for you. It's so devastating when that happens. Glad you're feeling a bit stronger now and I saw you had some good support. MN is brilliant for stuff like that! Hope you're having s great holiday, onwards and upwards and welcome back! 😀❤️

Spent a few hours lurking in POF last night... Perhaps I'm just too fussy but looks like I will never date again! Not had meaningful conversations just the I'm new here, have you been here long type of thing. Some are so aggressive, wanting your number in only the second message and lose the plot when you say no. Others just have a go for not responding within 30 seconds. I'm sure it is just me still finding my feet...

Hi Silk as you know I'm new to all this as well and after reading this and a few other threads I thought I'm not going to respond to Hi how are you type messages but found if I didnt then I wouldn't be speaking to anyone! So I suppose I have lowered my standards a bit there and have got chatting to some nice people.

I was a bit scared of handing out my number, and one guy who I've since binned off for being far too over the top did con me a bit to get it, but I have given it out to a couple of people now one of whom I meeting tomorrow who sounds nice.

So I would say just give it a chance or alternatively contact a few people you like the look of - if the guy tomorrow doesnt work out I will try that I think.

Thanks Petal. How exciting that you got a date with someone who sounds nice. Will do a few searches myself but so far not seen anyone I like the look of either. Looks are not everything but there is a limit and photos taken in a pub are just not doing it for me!

Remember you are not obliged to reply to everyone who contacts you, you wouldn't reply to all the junk mail that comes through your door would you? I think some men just contact all the new women and hope someone replies! Do a search yourself and see if someone appeals to you.

One good thing about this thread is that we can see these things are not just happening to us as an individual, it's part of the whole nature of OLD

We're all fabulous!😀

sparklesnpearls Good for you moving on! If he isn't that interested then it is good for you, and if he is interested and needs a kick then this will do it.
Men, are in general, idiots!

Destinysdaughter
Good advice and good points! No need to engage with everyone and no point in listening to the random negatives that fly through OLD.

So I've been having some good online chats with the writer guy. Turns out we've got quite a bit in common and are in a similar line of work! Think he'll be a good person to know even if we dont fancy each other. He's taking me for lunch on Sunday. Think the osteopath is genuine but he's quite a bit younger than me...so not serious relationship material, more a bit of fun possibly. ( and a good massage at least! )