Tinder Temptresses Unite....It's Dating Thread 106

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Omg treeman just no

Destiny after a few falls starts on pof I hid my profile and now only message people whose profile I like the look of- they can then see my profile but the masses can't. This is working really well so far.

mrwelshboy in particular. We've talked lots on the phone and he sounds great. Just really hope when we meet up on Friday night (babysitting Gods please smile on me) that I fancy him as much in person. Because he's frighteningly clever, makes me laugh and has the sexiest voice on the planet. And his pics were good too. Only reason I can think he's single is because he is quite high maintenance I think. But I can deal with that as I'm not into getting serious and I don't think he is either so that would not be my problem to deal with.
Swoon

newsparklylife why was it so awful?

newsparkly Oh no?! Bad date with tree man?

Where do I start! Everything, way he spoke just very very difficult people. Sounded like my ex for starters he was a nice guy just very very not for me!

Signed up for POF now, might as well have a laugh while trying to find this elusive man for me!

Oh and he smoked which is a big no for me and I hadn't realised

Oh what a shame sparkly

Onward and upward tho!

Petal68, Thanks
Think I will give POF a go. Just a shame they are not offering a weeks trial membership like Match do.

Hi Silk they don't have a trial but it's free for most things on POF I haven't paid for anything - you can upgrade for the meet me feature and a few other things but I wouldn't bother to start with.

If someone clicks meet me you get an email showing their user name which you can search for instead - most of mine have been hundreds of miles away so not worth the cost of upgrading.

Let us know how you get on!

newsparkly sorry your date wasn't great. But...there's a good lesson here, which is that it's SO important not to get invested in someone before you meet them for real. You just do not know what someone is like until you meet face to face and it's easy to project our fantasies and what we want into them when it's just words on a screen.

Also...you gotta kiss a lot of frogs ( metaphorically speaking!) 😀🐸

So I've got a lunch date lined up for the writer on Sunday ( which means I'm gonna have to read more of his wretched book!) Think I'm just going to skim read the rest and be quite vague in my feedback. I think I'm the first person to have read it! I don't want to be unkind and he doesn't write badly but it's a man writing as a woman and some of it just doesn't ring true. ( and there's lots of sex in it...)

I am thinking of joining POF too. Never done OLD before so I am somewhat nervous/sceptical...

Oooh, looks like I am famous :-D

One of my not so great tinder dates has written about me in a blog!

petal68, Thanks for that. Assumed one had to pay to be able to respond to messages.. Cool. Roll on lunch break!

So much to catch up on!
Destinys How are things with the Management Consultant/Porscheman? Will you be seeing him again?

Minop your cup is overflowing with irons right now. How lovely! It’s exhausting juggling them all though isn’t it.
newsparklylife shame about treeman. You never know until you meet them!
Petal68 he sounds like a right chancer. Forcing you to give your number.
Oh Damson that’s fantastic when that happens. I call it ‘fluffy’ as it’s so rare for me to get besotted with someone but so lovely all the same.
Whatam1doing Such a shame about Planeman! I had high hopes for him. Do you think he just couldn’t sustain it? Is he too busy/other stuff going on? MrVTall sounds lovely and consistent though.
ReCycledParent what?! Why? Did you know you’d be blog fodder? Is it complimentary? Please share
Well, ITbloke has been ill all weekend so no contact really and Audidriver wanted to see me Sunday night but I turned him down. I don’t know why but I’m not feeling the love with him anymore –even though he’s hot as hell and keeps sending me the most erotic naked pictures of himself— No further approaches from RichardGeer either. I’m starting to think I need to find men who live closer to me as they seem to go for the most convenient option (close by).

singleandfabulous I did not know I would be blog fodder, it looks like it's a new blog and they are retrospectives.

For clarity, I am Mr Cycling

cutetalescurlytailsandcocktales.wordpress.com/

I would like to just outline a few things that are skewed from her view of things though (this is not an exhaustive list):

1. I do not wear a wedding ring and have not for many years as it never really fit. I was at my largest when I got married and as it is made of Titanium it is very difficult to resize. I do however have very fine long hair. As a result of this the bobbles that I use are tiny, too tiny to fit on my wrist. The bobbles I use are so small that they sit on my fingers (without twisting as they are that small) for when I want to tie my hair back. The ideal finger for doing this is my ring finger and I alternate between my left and right.
2. She made a big thing about not going on tinder anymore (clearly a "your the one" kind of move) and the profile I matched with corroborated this. She had two facebook accounts however and both were separate tinder accounts, the second one came up on my swiping a week later with a very recent pic on it (one she had sent me from the weekend). So from this I knew I could not take her at her word. I let it go though until she made the same claim a week or so later so I called her up on it. She tried to turn it around saying that I was still swiping if I'd seen it, which was true but I had never claimed otherwise.
3. She had mentioned PoF a few times so when I was bored on the 5.5 hour train journey to see my parents I thought I would download it to have a look, within three hours of doing this I get a message from her about what I am looking for!
4. She was caught using tinder when she said that she wasn't (not that I had issue with the act, just the lie) and she discovered me "by accident" within an hour of me completing my profile on PoF! This does not sound to me like someone who was in a completely different frame of mind about the situation.

All that aside, there were far too many red flags from her to ignore, I gave her the benefit of the doubt far too often.

Just came on to share an especially rubbish message I got today:

"Well let's start with something you like Hi hoe are you, your s pretty Sexy lady, lol no well yes you are but. I meant to say morning Foxy, is it possible that you could tell me exactly who of what kind of guy your looking for or is it just a fun loving Average looking Sensual and Sexual gut to have great nights of Sex with and to enjoy the pleasures that are free in life and great fun. My name is Xxxx mother always called Me Xxxx guess I knew when I was in trouble then. Anyway I would love a reply if you get chance Xx

( tears hair out! )

Anyone want him..?

Destinysdaughter Wow, he sounds like a real keeper

Can I share my favourite message from when I was OD, following the fabulous opening gambit Destiny received? I used to be on this thread a lot three years ago and shared it then but still the most memorable.

I should point out for reference, I am a childfree man, have always been open about this on my profiles, always polite. Never ever messaged anyone who wasn't similarly childfree. But I used to get unsolicited messages from women just to give some abuse out. Not exactly word-for-word, but near enough:

"You are clearly a wanker and a player so why don't you just fuck off? You're just here to try and get laid despite your attempt at a reasonable profile. All decent women want children so just fuck off your arsehole!"

Wow that's harsh!

Recycled, having read the blog and your response it sounds like 6 of one, half a dozen of the other.

But she did say some very nice things about you too!

I think the problem with OLD is that everyone is hedging their bets and multi dating and seeing if there is somebody better just round the corner. I think it's important to be upfront about it on both side but pp often aren't.

I also feel pp don't always take the time with one person to really get to know them and see how it develops. Last year I saw a really nice guy for 4 months and hid my profile, just stopped looking. It didn't work out as he wasn't entirely honest about his intentions and was just too busy but it was good for a while!

StillDrSethHazlittMD Wow, that sounds just plain abusive and uncalled for! I have heard other similar stories from people who are upfront in their profile about what they want and see as deal breakers. Makes sense to me to get things like that out the way, that's why I have always stated in my profile that I have a child that I share 50/50 care of. If it's a deal breaker then it needs to be recognised straight away.
Just out of interest though, if you are a single child-free man seeking single child-free women what are you getting out of being on mumsnet?

Jesus Destinys he sounds unhinged! I'm loving the idea of a sensual and sexual gut though

ReCycled you had a lucky escape there in my opinion.

I'm child free too and bloody love MN!

It's a great place to chat or get advice and support about pretty much anything really. Though it is quite unusual for a single guy with no kids to be here or even know about it. Personally I have no issue with anyone being here as long as they are respectful and not a troll!

StillDrSethHazlittMD As a childfree woman I'm clearly not decent then and neither are all my childfree friends according to her. Well let's just say you dodged a bullet.

Destinysdaughter I assumed that everyone doing online dating is multidating until they have the "exclusive" talk? If I have read this wrong then I have to hold my hands up as having been very bad as I have never pointed out (without being asked) that I have other irons in the fire. Is this something that I should have been doing?