Tinder Temptresses Unite....It's Dating Thread 106

[PrizeyPrize]

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Sparkles & Witches I have severe fireman envy! Sounds fantastic. Ive never had the pleasure (had a soldier & a sailor though)

Witches cant believe mr invisible. it just shows that he's in it for attention and just likes knowing youre there

Mr IT has calmed down trying to psychoanalyse me now & has reverted to cheeky/interesting texts which i like. Havent heard from Audidriver since Thursday and 2 exes have been in touch. One of whom lives with his girlfriend the other is rich & lovely but i just dont fancy him and bedroom antics used to be very quiet (to those whove read my earlier posts, he's the one who had the 'orgasm alert' of 'Oo dear.')

sparkles and mizzp I'm glad it's not just me! Was starting to think I needed to get a grip

The firemen sound lovely, ah strong men...

Oo Thing! Tell us about Tinder Guy!

SicknSpan me too. I WISH i could be the confident, witty, sexy, playful person I am with so so irons with red hot irons but i just cant. I find it hard to even breath around my red hot irons

Oh thing liking the sound of tinder man. Sometimes they thing they have to be a bit sleazy to prove their tinder worthy when actually they're nice guys.

Well date 2 with mrvtall was a lovely walk on the beach a wander through the forest and then a pub lunch and back to his flat .which he shares and his flat mate was home so all good and well behaved.

I had a lovely day and hes a really really nice guy we like lots of the same things and even a very obscure American folk singer who I love and most people have never heard of... ..

Argh and planeman has upped his game and is phoning each night for a chat , we had the L word tonight on the phone ...oh great I have to choose ....

single I remember 'ooh dear' Man, hilarious.
Wonder why the 2 exes have got in touch now?

And yes, I'm the same with the double persona. I'm nervous enough with any date (detest that first 'appraisal' when you initially set eyes on one another) and I gabble when I'm nervous. But it's worse if I really like them. I want to be all cool and witty and entertaining, but inside I feel like I'm probably coming across more as a sort of Ugly Betty comedy character. Without the braces and hideous dress sense.

whatam1doing did you find out why Planeman was cancelling dates etc recently?
Mr V Tall sounds great. Not fair that you have two, I'm gonna move to where you live, there's obviously a surplus of hot middle-aged men. What a dilemma! Maybe don't choose just yet...???

Nothing much more to add about Tinder guy single I've already said most of what I know about him. He's polite, good at the messaging (and I can get put off very easily by text talk/crap spelling/grammar), hasn't said anything smutty, and we just had a very nice, easy conversation. He wears decent glasses that suit him and make him look intelligent, I like a slightly geeky look! And no beer belly, everything is nicely in proportion from what I could see. Own house, decent job...seems a nice, normal chap!
oh, and he knows all about wine, even has a website dedicated to reviewing it...my mum would have been very impressed and would immediately decide that he couldn't possibly be 'common'

Wow I've just caught up on the last 5 pages....I never get time to read and comment properly, what with the school hols and the fact I now seem to spend all my time chatting to people on line haha!

Has anyone tried eharmony? Was thinking of trying it. I'm on OK Cupid but it's very small and not having any luck, and on POF which is throwing up some really unappealing options...wondering if there is somewhere better?

Ooooh single a sailor is definitely on par with a fireman. Next comes army guy n then a policeman....strange I don't rate ambulance men high...

Thingintheattic I'll try n remember name change but do have trouble keeping up. Wish they'd change it so you can reply to posts like on FB be soooo much easier. Could go through you all one by one as I use an app so hard to scroll back

Single wish I'd heard more about 'ooooh dear ' man sounds a hoot!

3beardedgoats funnily enough I looked at Eharmony on Friday. I think it takes itself very seriously, definitely aimed at those seeking a serious relationship. Very expensive though and you can't see the prices until you 'join' by answering millions of personality questions. I was very cross to discover after spending about an hour on it that I couldn't afford any of them! Cheapest was about £12 a month, but you had to sign up for about 5 years for that rate ... And you can't pay monthly.

On the plus side though, I guess the faff and expense of it will put off those who just want to waste time/mess about etc. Wonder if you could get your money back if you join and then discover there are only 3 people in your area? They don't even let you see your matches or who's on it without paying.
They do have a half price offer on at the moment though.

sparkles sorry about the name change ( I'm witches!) but worry not. I reply to the wrong people even when they haven't changed their name. I too wish we could just click on who we are replying to.
'Ooh dear' man appeared when I was lamenting the cringy story of my last date on the previous thread. I was surprised and disappointed to find that he was completely silent during bedroom althletics. No sound or speaking whatsoever, even when he 'peaked' I couldn't tell. I didn't like it at all, and single came along and said 'ooh dear' man was the same, except for uttering 'ooh dear' at the crucial moment

No don't think I'd pay for eharmony, my mate did and said traffic was very poor n that was in Leeds so big city.

Mr fireman's profile is still on but his pictures are still missing n he never online. Feeling giddy as our third date tonight. It's his dad's funeral tomorrow n so said would understand if he wanted to cancel but he said no, would take his mind off things. Really thought he 'd cancel as he been very quiet last day or so but he got lot on his mind

Tinderguy does sound promising Thing! Your date sounds really fun :)

Couple of irons for me at present. I actually did an air grab on Thursday when I looked in Kik and saw 3 of them typing at the same time It'll be quiet enough again of course but that did make me smile.

A RL one- MrBadTiming. Think this one could actually be the real deal but timing for both of us is horrific so we're going to revisit in the future. In touch every few days or so but I've pulled back as my head was getting a bit messed up. It can wait but I so like him and its really hard because i haven't got down and dirty for AGES we get on SO well and there is a lot of chemistry too. Fancy him rotten.

MrWalls- to do with his job- he got in touch via pof and we messaged before meeting up on friday for coffee quite last minute. I was so unprepared but we got on well and there was a nice enough kiss at the end! Quite fancy him and we had already arranged a Tues meet but he's gone a bit quiet so we'll see whether that happens.

MrWelshboy (total sucker for a welsh accent)- loved his pof profile. Seems funny, clever and a bit off kilter too- my cuppa entirely. Chatted yesterday and trying to work out when we could get a date in the diary. I think I might not be cool enough for him though. We'll see.

MrMetal- musical reference- nearly cancelled our date as we got on fabulously texting but I wasnt sure if I fancied him. Date was great, coffee and a walk- we laughed a lot and I would def like him as a friend but don't know if there was anything more. We'll see I suppose.

Mr.Wall is ghosting me I think. Grr!

Ugggh Thing i really do hate that when they don't make a sound in bed...I'm quite vocal and if we gonna be compatible my man has to be too.

Really quick drop in from me as I'm heading out with friends... So sorry it's me me me!

Sparkles - Yes we have been out on dates too! we said next time we should go for drinks/food, or have an evening of doing something out and then home to cook as we didn't end up doing it last time. So I know we would happily go out too! I don't want to fall into this routine though, so today I've backed off with the texting over this weekend. He knows I want to see him again (we both text about it yesterday after he left), but I'm figuring if he wants to talk to me/see me enough he will maybe chase a bit now. Is that the wrong thing to do? I don't want to play games at all, he's pretty consistent, BUT I do feel he needs to now up his efforts a little. I am trying to keep the 'I am the prize' mentality!

Sorry this is all about me and I havent got up to speed yet on everyone's situation.

Can I just ask when you get generic messages from people like 'hi beautiful' do you reply if you dont fancy them just to be polite? I've had a few but one who I havent replied to you has texted twice more now saying 'not speaking' dont want to be ignorant but would you reply saying sorry not interested or just ignore? I feel like I'm being rude but maybe just need a thicker skin! I do tend to be a bit too 'nice' to not hurt people's feelings but really dont want to chat to him!

As a plus point had more messages in a day from POF than I had last time from Match - dont really fancy any of them tho lol.

Hi petal, I'll be interested to hear what others say to that, as I am wondering the same! I did ignore one guy who messaged me as I knew straight away that I wasn't interested at all, but now thinking if I should have replied something to him..? His message was very short kind of 'fancy a chat?'

Also, so far I've had men sent me the first message but if you do message them yourself first what do say..? Thinking whetherI should be more proactive myself rather than waiting on them..

Off to catch up with the thread now as have been away for the weekend

Gosh so much going on. sick wow you've got a lot going on.

Have a friend who used eharmony now engaged to one of her matches on there. But i agree it's expensive and detailed

thing you can't not move here ...all the more for me!! Though 2 is enough for me mrvtall and planeman.. Both v different but both so nice ...and a night away with planeman is booked by him for Tuesday. ..so mind blowing sex is on the cards ....

Hi petal to be honest there is no right or wrong answer to replying/not replying if you don't want to chat. I am pathologically polite, it goes completely against my nature to ignore, so I usually say 'thanks for the message, I don't feel we'd be suited, all the best' or something like that. To be honest though... Whatever you do, you will piss someone off at some point!
Some don't like to be turned down, and will keep at you 'how do you know we aren't suited, we haven't even talked or met!' Etc. Most ARE glad not to be left wondering though, and will either say 'thanks for the reply' or just not bother you again.
If you DON'T reply to a message, you will get the ones who go on about it, like the one you have now.
So you can't win. Basically, I take the view that if I've politely said no, then that's it and if they show off about it I simply block them. I try not to ignore, but if you're getting a lot of messages, you really can't spend all your time saying 'hi, not interested' to everyone that just says 'hi'... As rude as it may seem.

Well, I'm waiting for TinderWineGuy to ring, he was going to ring at about 6 to talk about arranging the date... BUT, I told him about my slight disability earlier in a message, as I didn't feel I should put him on the spot during a phone call. now I know he's read it within the last hour( blue ticks on whatsapp) but no phone call as yet. I did say what I always do, that I understand if it's an issue for them... But I'm kinda hoping it isn't. I didn't think he was the type that would be phased by it, so we will see. Not looking hopeful, really. Bugger.

However, on a lighter note, I have been asked out by another Tinder guy who DIDNT get phased by it, so all is not lost. This one's a nurse, but not sure yet if he's only in it for the fun of dating as he said he's been on Tinder for two months and is 'so glad he did'. Seems to have done a lot of chatting and had quite a few dates, but don't get the impression it's a 'just for sex' thing with him.

Oh, guess what ladies?

TinderWineGuy just blocked me on whatsapp and unmatched me om Tinder. Wow, what a gentleman.

Do you know, it really boils my piss (to use a phrase I've only ever seen on MN) that some people do not have the most basic manners. It's FINE if they don't want to date someone with a slight, teeny tiny disability (although unfortunate that they can't see past that) but it's the feckin rude behaviour that gets me.
Anyway, I seem to have accidentally sent him a message on facebook pointing out the error of his ways. Oops:

" Hi, Alex,
Thanks so much for blocking me on whatsapp and unmatching me on Tinder. You know, it would have been so much nicer if you could have shown a bit of class and just replied to my message. As I said, it's FINE if it is an issue for you. It's NOT fine to behave like a cowardly little shit. So disrespectful. You should be ashamed of yourself.
Thankfully, there are plenty of men on Tinder and out in the real world with much better manners and values.
Take care, oh and let's hope you never stop being so physically perfect that someone feels it's fine to behave towards YOU like that, eh?

ThingInTheAttic"

Childish, possibly...but I felt so much better after that

You go girl Thing! What a brilliant message that was! Like we discussed before I really hate ghosting and especially in this situation it is such bad manners and rude behaviour of him just to block you and unmatch you!
What an absolute twat. I guess at least he showed you his true colours!

But good news about the other Tinder guy!

And I managed catch up with most of the thread from last few days earlier, what is going on with MrInvisible? Did you eventually reply to his whatsapp? I really don't understand him either..!

Go thingintheattic!! Good on you... He sounds charming his loss!!