30 day no contact for the broken hearted - starts here

[Thewizardo]

I will be using this as my own personal no contact diary.

read here first

Please feel free to join in the thread if you are attempting to go no contact with someone. If you've just been dumped, left or had your heart broken.

I'm on day 1 today. So far today I've blocked his FB/what's app/Instagram etc. I text him to ask him to leave me alone as he's texting quite a bit. Only emergency texts only about DD.

I was right day 2 is the hardest. I almost crumbled and text him earlier but for the first time in a long time I managed to listen to the voice telling me I'd feel worse for it. That voice has to be right. Not only that, if I don't get him out of my life I will never have room for a decent man in my life.

Yay people, good choices! Well done! Keep on keeping on, you CAN do it.

Ok, I'm back in the room! Day 1 re-start for tomorrow. The little contact have had has just made me feel even lower so here goes to NOTHING!

Day 2 done. No contact was easy as I was quite busy. His DM came to pick up DD and he dropped off. He tried talking to me 'so is this it then, we're not even going to be friends? not ever again'. I just looked away and said 'no DP we aren't, you don't get to be friends with me' he said 'I do care you know, I know you don't think I do but i do, this is hard for me' I just told him to go and then left the kitchen.

He is determined not to make this easy for me.

Hi can I join please...bought sticky gold stars for one and all , day 2 after a lapse email after finding out he has yet another ow ( string of them) in our home, we escaped dv, the house is on the market, feeling so down today .

Hey Free from,big gold star with knobs in for you for escaping DV and that knob. You may feel low but good things will come out of this shit thing, promise.
Wizardo, well done too, I am proud of you. He's no friend, you know that now. He will probably crank up the "poor me" shite soon, then you will be the world's worst and it will all be your fault...keep you nerve, keep your resolve, and do not rise to the bait.
And to everyone else, I know it is hard ,but keep on keeping on x

Thank you Resilience, you are so right x I am trying so hard, thanks for the boost 🙂

Does anyone else get an awful dread feeling when they wake up on a morning? We've not spoken since Monday when we had an argument..

I get the dread most mornings, my way of dealing with it is to think of something that really makes you happy, a place, a happy time and try and completely block the panic taking over your day, it helps me x hopefully it will pass

Yes, I feel sadness when I wake up and at bedtime and at work but I rewrite my list of significant lies he had no problem telling me / keeping things from me and I remember how I felt. Why he thought he was better than me and his life was more important than mine I don't know. I can't have my life ruined anymore. I'm on day 12.

Jenny you are doing so well. I might rewrite my list too, into a more chronological order. I find night times the worst especially when the DC aren't here.

Loving this quote at the moment so posting it here.

Anyone else find it hard to manage the mixed emotions? Had a good day but feeling low again now.

Yes felt very sad this morning, weather didn't help though.

Feeling a bit more up now, it's a bloody roller coaster!

If mornings are tricky for you then plan a morning routine before you go to bed the night before.
Start your day with some positive affirmations (hey, stop rolling your eyes at the back there, they actually do work!) . Even something simple like "today is going to be a good day" or "I love the world and the world loves me", can lift your mood and help you start the day on a positive.
Give thanks for what you have, not what you don't have. Take it right down to basics like a roof over your head, a comfy bed, clothes to choose from, breakfast to eat. Throw some gratitude out there rather than dwelling on loss.
Our emotions are within our control people, so own them.Great idea from Free from, think of your happy place. Yes it is a roller coaster, and just like any rollercoaster for every swoop down there is a rise back up to the top.
Keep keeping on people, you are all doing great x

All of you on here are keeping me going too. I listen to Living Joy, Don't stop moving every car journey. I imagine my ds being able to me happy again with someone else one day. I'm reading all I can on moving on. I do some other part time work so am forcing myself to do some of that and I'm going to try and take some first steps to selling a product I make. I'm forcing myself to get busy. I'm absolutely not going to let this destroy me as I fear it really could.
Keep going everyone, you're keeping me going.

I text him.
I heard something about him that made me feel rubbish, I forgot all sense of I'll feel worse afterwards and text him.
My day one will begin again tomorrow and next time I think I'm going to text him I'll message here instead. I do feel worse now.

Flurple, I have emailed today, poops hit the fan, feel so lousy, same here, the lies he has told people including ow he met on pof, I just want out now, the despicable man didnt even ask after our children , feel such a failure today

It's a painful feeling isn't it!
You're not a failure, practice makes perfect. This has to get easier and we will be stronger for it. He's at fault here, I keep reminding myself of that and knowing once I get through this there will be someone better who I can welcome into my life.

Finding it hard as not only feeling the loss of dp but also best friend.. They were messaging each other.. Feel lost. I've started decorating but feeling a failure

Still here too, Day 7. One week since our last conversation. Friday is a tough day anyway as it was 'our' evening and night. Not any more. Anyway, still here and still hanging on in there. I'm giving alcohol a very wide berth for the foreseeable, I reckon it'd make me crumble and do something stupid.

Hope you're all ok this evening. For those of who have fallen off the wagon, welcome back on board. For those of you thinking of falling off, grap my hand here and hang on. Baby steps all, baby steps. We'll get there.

we are not failures, they are frurple, thank you no fool xx

It is very very hard but I know from past experience it gets easier eventually and in the past I've always got to a point where something just clicks and I know I don't feel the same about the person anymore as if it was right we wouldn't have broken up.

I agree Jenny, I am trying, once the house is sold, I will feel so much better x, thank you , an inspiration

Can I join please ?

I am neatly 30 days ladies and I admire each and everyone of you ...... I have read your threads and you have saved me from keeping in contact ...... Didn't realise I was in abusive manipulative cheating partner until it was too late and was hooked .... I have blocked everything, I still have moments and think he will write although he had said was with someone and then 3 days later said he wasn't after that blocked him every which way I could . Still hope he might write ..... What a sad individual I am ......... Sorry to off load .

Arghh. It's so hard.. on my own with son all night a im feeling so lonely. I miss him so much. I miss his messages, I miss his positiveness and resilience. But I never felt good enough.