Spring has sprung and the sap is rising! It's Dating Thread 104

[IToldYouIWasFreaky]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP

Hi all, work/life stoopidly manic and I haven't a hope of catching on everything but just wanted to say happy birthday freaky, hope you've had a great day!

314 good luck on the job, glad interview went well.

handy we spoke a good few weeks back I think on here about slow burners, head over heart, protecting ourselves so how we can know what we really feel and all that. So glad things are going well with twix. We're still in a similar position, I'm about 10 weeks in with a once a week get together and getting increasingly smitten. Cautiously happy!

Sorry everyone else, still love the thread and love reading about you all, but never enough time to reply properly!! Some really lovely positive stuff on here at the mo, good luck everyone and above ok enjoy - and if you're not enjoying, ditch and move on

Above all, not above ok!

Happy birthday Freaky hope you had a lovely day so far and hope you had good news on the job 314

Why do my conversations die down just as we're getting to the point of arranging a date!?

Do they not want to meet up? Are they just chatting on line? I realise that there are a lot of people (women too) who aren't ready, aren't brave enough, aren't energetic enough, certain enough, single enough... to go OUT in to the REAL world and meet up!

FGS.

Right. I'm going to put on the work out gear and blast it out now.

Hi, wondered if I could get some advice? Joined pof Saturday, a guy messaged me Sunday, I've actually met him in person, he asked me to go out nxt Saturday for a drink. I said yes. So he messaged Monday, nothing tues. now we're on weds. Should I forget it? any ideas? To be honest I specially joined as I saw him on there, and hoped he'd contact me????

Hi Help do you mean you know this chap from RL or have you been on a date already?

Either way he's either thinking 'great, date's in the bag' or he's a flake..

I wouldn't necessarily forget it, but don't overthink it - not easy but very important.

Evening everyone!

Help me!! I might be on the road to smittenville swooning all the way despite my best efforts to remain grounded! Leicester is definitely moose hunting and I'm enjoying feeling relaxed and trying not to get myself whipped up. It helps that I have the gym as distraction! He has text today to ask if thinking about me this much is normal, we have made plans for Saturday and he asked about whether I'm still on tinder/ dating other people. I'm not and neither is he. I am just about managing to maintain my composure, I just need to get to Sat without bursting. I keep telling myself not to get excited until he is physically in front of me. But inside I'm like

Bant that sounds great, like you are both in the best position now to give it another chance. I hope it goes well for you. I love a planned weekend of copious sex

Sassy brilliant update, I'm getting good vibes about this!

Waving there will always be things like that in real life and recognising the solution (communication) is the key to a proper relationship and respect.

314 I too would be turned off by the reluctance to put a date in the diary, it's like he's possibly waiting for something better to come along and doesn't want to commit to meeting just in case. Not very attractive at all.

Reddish lol at 'how do you spell obnoxious' . I agree with others about your situation. I think you need to take control now and make the decision to move on. Do this for yourself. There are other lovely women out there who will want a whole relationship (including physical) with you.

Handy I'll never get tired of hearing lovely things about Twix, it's not all been smooth but I think it's going at a good pace, it feels just right through my computer screen .

Help welcome to the thread! Make sure you have other irons on the go to keep a healthy level of distraction going in the early stages. Nearer the time (perhaps Friday?) I would send him a message asking about the plans, I think it's better to ask as you sound like you're in control. You have a busy diary doesn't he know! This thread is also a fabulous distraction

Scarf the status quo is a good place!

Bubbling a second date is always a good idea if there could be something there worth having. If I'm not sure, a second look is helpful.

misszp it sounds like you're handling the irons well and working out what you do/ don't want. Definitely read up on MH, a lot of his work is based on meeting people in RL so should be useful for RL irons.

He works locally, barbers, I tried smiling at him but no luck. So joined Dating site as saw him in there. He's been messaging tonight via pof, chit chat, but hadn't mentioned Saturday? He seems to be on pof a lot 😞

Eek, I have a sort of non-date/meet up with CurlyMuso tonight (ahead of our actual date on Sunday). I am meeting a friend for a quick drink and suggested to him he comes for a quick drink too. Luckily I'm getting my hair done after work this avo so at least that will look fab. Butterflies!

Eek butterflies tanya you know what that's just awesome! Have a brilliant pre-date date tonight. How many dates have you had with Curlymuso?

Help try not to stress, if you can, about him yet. You don't know him, you're the prize, heck you may not even like him! Watch some Amy Young vids to bring you back down to earth.

Waving you're allowed to mess up and get stressed and stuff, real life has to creep in somewhere at some point and I'm sure MTG knows what it's like. How often does he see his kids?

Tulip it's lovely having someone on the slowcoach smitten bench with me. Twix sent me a quite touching message last night. Was gobsmacked and wasn't sure what to say. I feel like the cat that got the cream and am crossing off the days til next Tues. I can now say this stuff to Twix whereas before I couldn't and the feelings had nowhere to go and made me angsty. Not any more. Sorry thread. So much Teix gushing. Will try and rein in.

Foxtrot how lovely you feel like this about Leicester! Just be wary because those Moosehunting boots can be misleading. Let your head stay in charge of your heart if you can. Just for a few more dates maybe?

Disclaimer: I was completely not able to do this with Twix and there was no hope of me ever managing it. We had a ten day gap between dates 1 and 2 and it nearly killed me.

Looking forward to Curlymuso update...

Handy, Sunday will only be our second date because of my pulling away, then not having time because of my horse event. We've stayed in daily contact since date 1 though.

Ah that's what I thought, tanya - just wondered if I'd missed any in between...?

Excited for you!

Hoping to join you on the smitten bench...

Oh, it's tonight Waving, not really a date, I'm just in town for drinks with a friend and suggested he comes along to see me for a bit. Which he was quite up for...

Real, planned date on Sunday.

Morning all

Right thread catch up here we go.

waving sounds as though it's going really well. I admire you about how you're handling this with regard to your DC's. Taking notes.

handy gush away! Please. You and waving give us all optimism and hope. I'm personally beyond happy for anyone who is on the smitten bench. It's lovely to be in that zone.

tanya have a fab fab time tonight.

fox that's lovely! Another smitten one!

help my advice is to chill and leave him be. Let him step up a little.

314 how are you doing this morning? I have no freaking idea why people do that. Combo of can't be arsed / nervousness. It's rude.

freaky happy belated birthday for yesterday!

bant that's lovely! Sounds very grown up and loved up.

reddish I think you're more than entitled to seek closure if that is going to help you move on. However, in my experience people like this rarely give closure. I always think it's better to get closure yourself and move on. I think the way she has treated you is pretty poor and you should set higher standards of what ok looks like. This isn't it. So delete her details and move on. If she wanted you, trust me she wouldn't have done this.
Lol @ shit zone for men. It's because a lot of men in my environment would never show them being in the shit zone. If they are, they cover it with an immense amount of bravado.

to everyone else on thread, sorry it moves so fast to reply to everyone.

Now I know how mrcalm feels about messaging, I'm being more considerate. Happy Thursday all!

Thank you everyone, I can't keep up with this thread either, it moves so fast.

I know it will reveal his true intentions so I should just tell him I have children, I just wanted to have at least one date first as I know he will probably disappear after telling him.

How does everyone else cope with not getting replies on whatsapp when you can see they have been online??? Drives me mad. He didn't even read my last text sent at 9pm but was last seen at 1am.

It's a bad sign isn't it? Why do guys do that? I doubt he was 'too busy' at 1am. Probably talking to other women........sigh

I'm not seeing my guy until Monday. He responds to me on whatsapp well but he's still on OK Cupid. I have no idea how to have the exclusive convo, it will be date 5.

Jaffa try not to check. Whatsapp
Is the work of the devil, it's caused me so much heart ache. He could be messaging friends, I message my friends late at night sometimes.

Stuck on train.

jaffa I'm totally upfront about my DC's. My OLD profile said that I had them. I'd much rather not waste my time with anyone who didn't want to date anyone who has kids. Also, being totally frank, I would be totally unimpressed by someone who omitted to tell me that pre a first date. It would make me wonder what else they had to disclose. That's just my view. There are no shortage of people fine with dating people with kids.

I know you're right sassy. The last text I sent was asking if he lived alone. I was hoping he would then ask if I did and I could say about my children.

I normally would have the mindset that if they don't want to date someone with kids then they're not for me but I guess I really really want this guy to be genuine.

It's not often I come across someone I get this excited about so don't want it to end

Slow, I've been in that situation before. It's hard because you just need to know where you stand without coming across as needy.

I would just drop a hint and mention in conversation that you are coming off there and watch his response to gauge where he is at.