DRY 12

[HowBadIsThisPlease]

Old thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2584735-DRY-11?

The thread for people who want to kick the booze

Hello all, glad to see a new thread has been started. I am on day 9 here and I have to say this time it has been so easy, I am not going to get too complacent as yet but something about this time definitely feels a bit different. Perhaps it is just early days who knows.

Thinking of everyone else and reading avidly even though I might not post much.

:)

Hi everyone thank you all for your kind words after my melt down last night xx I drank loads of water before bed and during the night as couldn't handle waking with hangover this morning am feeling a bit more positive today plus I'm at work which always helps to a point! Very sleepy and can't wait to get home have dinner and get an early night xx I hope all of you have a good sober day xx lots of love

How many days were you sober rose? Xx

Hiya Lou and Rose

Rose sorry, I skimmed the thread and missed you were emotional and struggling. Hope you are okay. Bed early.... mmm...... bliss.

This weekend my husband went out on a big booze up with the blokes from work. It's an annual thing and he was home v v late and spent all Sunday in a heap, trying to recover from a million pints, shots and by the looks of the kitchen, a kebab. I felt sorry for Jim and remembered all the lost YEARS of feeling shit and shakey and paranoid and tired and worried. And it dawned on me that I never have to feel like that again.

When I contemplated giving up drinking, all I could focus on is what I was losing - how would nights out be, how would we socialise, etc. But I didn't count all the bad stuff that went with it. It is a massive relief.

him, not Jim!

So hard when drinking and socioaing is our every Friday and SatuRday night. Either with my husbands work colleagues or friends etc. Always food and drink involved and the temptation is unreal x I can't wait until I hit the day where im 100% ready to stop. I just hope it's not to late by then . I hate alcohol in a way and wish it was illegal

Don't wait until you're 100% ready! That day will never come!

But you'll have to CHANGE what's normal and that might mean changing how you socialise. Did you drink when you were pregnant?

[SlimCheesy] i was sober just one day and then ruined it all but trying not to think about that now and move forward, worried about a work outing next friday (13th) going to Soho, London for meal and I know everyone else will be drinking not sure how to handle it?

Halle welcome I concur with the thoughts already posted here.

I just wanted to jump on and say you don't have to hate yourself and alcohol won't make you stop hating yourself. You said yourself you hate the idea of being an alcoholic.

Instead of hating yourself, it's alcohol you should be hating, and what it is doing to you.

The fact is that if you can't control it once you start drinking, there is a problem there. It doesn't matter if you have sober nights sometimes. It is causing problems. And you sound like you want to be free from that.

Think of alcohol as an abusive partner. A bad friend. Something you thought was going to deliver some benefits, happiness, support or escape or whatever, but is actually turning out to be detrimental, destructive and cruel.

Get hold of the Jason vale book that has been recommended. It really worked for me.

I was like you for a looooong time. Kept justifying my drinking, trying to rationalise that it wasn't that bad, I didn't need or want to stop, I could just cut down etc etc. It didn't work at all.

Since reading that book and another by Craig Beck called 'alcohol lied to me' my mindset has completely changed and now I enjoy an AF lifestyle. Yes, enjoy it. I'm going to a birthday party at the weekend and I'm really looking forward to going, being sober, ha I a few laughs and driving home sober and with no regrets or sore head the next day.

Give it a go

Not at all. Infact those whole 9 months were amazing because I knew I COULDNT drink. The choice was taken away from me if I wanted a healthy baby. And oh how nice it felt with no Sunday hangovers. But now she is nearly one and im slipping again. Rose I understand ur pain. I Have a party coming up and not sure how to cope. My husband suggested low percent beer so I won't get wasted but I will still feel like I'm not an outsider x I hate this. The anxiety of k owing this makes it worse to x

Cross posts there. Oncemore how long did it take you to give it up completely xx

Congrats to that btw xx

Halleberry I knew you'd say that! You CAN do this. But instead of knowing that drinking might harm your baby, replace that with drinking WILL and IS harming your life. It's a huge mind shift but it can be done and think how brilliant you'll feel without a hangover. Your reasons for not drinking really ARE as important as they were when you were pregnant.

Youre all so nice here. I thought I was going to be smacked down with a millions comments saying how disgusting I am etc so nice to have this support! Especially since technically speaking my drinking problem is pretty much a secret. Nobody knows the torment it causes me. Infact sometimes im a good laugh (or being laughed at more like) but everyone seems to want me at their parties cause with even just one drink im the life and soul. My poor husband and kids have been through so much shit with me xx

Rose I think it is really important to just think about today and not project to the 13th. If you really focus and get some days under your belt you might feel differently when the 13th comes around. I find that if I worry about a day in the future that might be difficult then I tend to slip and think well I might as well wait until after that day because I know I am going to "have" to drink because it's a party etc etc.

Halle we have all been there and have suffered due to drinking also, so there will be no smacking down here at all.

Alcohol is a nasty nasty little drug. And society at large does not take it seriously enough IMO.

^^ This.

Baffling and cunning, alcohol is.

Rose can you be a designated driver? Only trouble is if you are sober and driving someone home who just wants to party. You can't leave when you want!

Do you have to go? Can you not just say something has come up?

What Lou says also.

This is the best ive felt in a long time. It's like im getting this big secret off my shoulders. Im not saying im "cured" now at all nor am
I saying that's it I will never drink again. But I feel like a weight has been lifted off because i haven't told anybody apart from here about this xx

Admitting it is the very hardest part.

All this is new to me too. This is where I was, last year.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2520468-Please-help-me-Im-an-alcoholic?pg=1&order=

Im pleased for you that you came out that dark place. For me I guess I don't feel I ever will. I dunno how to be "straight". Can't remember the last time I didn't drink then take pills the following day (prescribed but still). I have depressin anxiety GAD and ocd and I can't stand it. Drink and my Meds are all I feel
I have to stop me being lonely even tho I have 2 beautiful kids and a husband who adores me xx

Ah yes, the pills. What I didn't put in that thread, because at the time I didn't realise it was relavent, were the drugs I was taking just to deal with the hangover. The hangover I'd got from drinking to take the edge off my nerves. See the cycle?

What drugs are you on?

Something I can 100% guarantee is that shortly after becoming sober, your GAD will improve massively.

Clomipramine for ocd and depression, Zopiclone for sleep, and Diazapam
For panic attacks. Sometimes I waken up and feel fine, others Id I had a gun beside me Id shoot myself . I know it's all about learning to change your whole life style but (no im not making excuses I swear). Im gebuinely lonely asy husband works seriously long hours. I have a baby and an almost 12 year old. Ive been through a bereavement,moved house, had a baby and got married all in the space of one year 😳. I don't have any friends or at least any I actually want to see. Even watching the telly with a glass of wine somehow seems more "enjoyable" with wine that with a cup of tea. Even just one glass to take the edge off. Im struggling to understand all of this because part of me thinks I'm just a problem drinkin not a full blown alcoholic xx

hi there can't be designated driver as currently don't have my licence, will get it back possibly in November this year (had a seizure). I'm normally the party one as well so it will be noticed :( have to go as it's visiting our london office and then it's followed by a meal then train home - dont want to travel alone either :( on a good note just had a jam doughnut lol xxxx