Rose and Matron yeah, dealing with raw emotions without alcohol is hard, I have found. Even dealing with ordinary feelings is a surprise. I find myself now being aware of what hunger feels like, or tiredness. Feeling emotional is triggering though, and it still takes me by surprise. I find it helps to have a lot of strategies in mind and use whatever is suitable at that point, eg walk away, eat something, tell the other person you need time to think, go to bed, whatever.
Even reading yesterday evening's posts brought into my mind some of the stuff that I "dealt with" in the last few years by getting drunk too much, and I felt a bit sad. Big stuff like my collapsing career and moving abroad. Choices and decisions that I didn't make truly clearly because I smothered my emotions in alcohol.
So, hm, lots of adjustments. Lots of relearning. I am massively calmer now and I don't fly off the handle at every little thing. It is great being sober and clear-headed. It is truly marvellous. It's a bit difficult dealing with the emotional stuff though, the realisation of who I am now I am feeling my own feelings and not drowning them.
Lily and Howbad, how're you doing today?
Oh yeah, Matron, the giving up several times over that you were talking about. I think that is part of the process for many of us. I spent most of last year lurching between sober spells and drunk spells until I eventually thought enough's enough.