DRY 12

[HowBadIsThisPlease]

Old thread
www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2584735-DRY-11?

The thread for people who want to kick the booze

Wow. Went to Pilates and then a bit of shopping and came back to all this?!

Howbad and lily am totally with you.

I do not like the 'alcohol controls you for life' philosophy and disagree entirely.

I went from 1-2 bottles of wine nightly for around 15 years to zero alcohol in less than 2 days. Easily. You know why? Because I truly wanted to. I don't mean thought I should but was not loving the idea of a night out on lemonade. I mean really deeply wanted to, for all the right reasons.

And I read books that helped me rid myself of the fear of being without. I think some people struggle exactly because of that 'life long struggle' attitude. That you have to work hard at it for the rest of your life. If you change your mindset, you won't have a daily battle because you'll be glad it's gone. It's true for me anyway

And it's true what was said up thread that I feel free. Completely free. I won't fall off the wagon because there is no wagon

Positivity is my main feeling since kicking the drink. When I go to bed, I feel good. When I wake up, I feel good. When I look in the mirror, I feel good and proud and happy.

I still have life struggles, they haven't gone away. But the overriding feeling for me now is positivity.

Power to us all, sober warriors. We are doing it!

Afternoon all, trying for positivity, I not wise but I am combining gentle weight loss as feeling much less dragged down, put on loads through drinking and now at day 25 AF and lost 3lb in 3 weeks, my weight is at an all time high at 11 stone 10lb, now 11 stone 7lb. Using Fitbit and walking to work and eating healthy( with choc snacks!), still very wobbly. Worried about lots on this tread and so hope it will all clear up and calmness resumes. Take extra care all on this lovely day, very triggery with the sun and also added stresses of life, you are all my sober warriors and real role models and aspire to the number of days/months year's most of you have achieved. I am not a big poster but thank you and take care x

You're alll making Me feel like some sort of monster Tryin to drag you off the wagon. Im really not trying to do that and I think you all should be so proud of yourselves and I myself hope to be as strong as some of you are now. Xx

Also reading LOADS both Jason vale and Allen Carr, and blogsThis time round feel very different for now, I agree oncemore I feel free, looking at alcohol in a very different light, I really do not want to drink and although not advised have been having AF larger now and again and it works for me as well as diet ginger beer which I love. My Fitbit is fab as is encouraging me to be more active and feeling much more energised. Looking forward to month 1 next week :)

Thank you

Jason Vale comes up time and time again. I am going to download his book.

Blimey. What a lot has happened since last night :(

Jason Vale is a great book. I am finding Headspace is excellent and still listen to AJ now and then.

Matron do it, a couple of years ago I did 6 months, but it really felt like a sentence to me. From advice from the lovelies on here I have now stopped asking myself what if etc, rather faced this full on, I really smiled at a blog the other day think it was Mrs d, was the simple statement we are not middle of the road kind, ie we drank loads ... Moderation does not make sense so logically we can be champions at sobriety. Jason vale really helpful at getting me to see what alcohol really is and rather than relaxing causes the stress in the first place. I really enjoyed Allen Carr as well.

Halle no one is making you feel like a monster. Well done on your AF days :)

Agree Jason vale was my saviour. A few chapters of his book and I was done with alcohol.

I was in a very bad place at the time too. Temporary but painful split with DP, went to my mums and drank two bottles on March 31.

Woke up April 1 and started reading it on kindle. March 31 was my last drink

Also another book that no one but me mentions on here but a sure winner if you liked the others - 'alcohol lied to me' by Craig beck.

You do have to read it with an open mind. It is contrary to everything we most believe about alcohol, or have been conditioned to think about it.

You have to open your mind and let the new perceptions flood in and take them on board

Afternoon all! Well I have had a lovely morning, been and done something that I love that I haven't been able to do for 3 months due to an injury. Injury wasn't drink related but still getting out and about and active is great.

The biggest thing for me is the paranoia, paranoid that I look like I have been on a bender the night before, and the hideous paranoia that I smell of wine has lifted. There are many things I don't (didn't) do in the mornings because I was paranoid people could smell wine on me....my cleaner comes at lunchtime when really she would love to come first thing but I put it off knowing that I might be a bit bleary eyed and fragrant at 09.00 in the morning. I didn't take my daughter to school in fear that I would have to stop and talk to someone on the school run. I don't do some social get togethers (coffee mornings, exercise classes etc) because I worry I look and smell hungover - very shameful.

Oh and it's lovely to remember the whole of the tv programme you watched the night before!

Hello

Knitting is great. I'm a rubbish knitter but I love the cosy regular feel of it.
Tea and box sets are also fab!
Gardening often comes up on these threads as good things to do... I think I'll try it this weekend.
Exercise is good if it comes with a non-pushishing mind set.
Cuddles with dcs if they are small enough to put up with it ;)

Strategy for this evening is early bed and some reading. I am shattered.

dd2 just screamed at me about some trivial nonsense. I said "come on you need to remember I'm not the bad guy. I'm not the guy making you feel bad. I'm the guy taking off your shoes and bringing you drinks. Tiredness is the bad guy."
She said
"I'M NOT TIRED!!!!!!!!!"

It was a classic piece of doublespeak. but... I've been there

I am also not the best knitter ever, but my closest friend after 18 years of trying and rounds and rounds of IVF is PREGNANT!!!! With a little girl.So i am knitting a baby pink scarf. Total labour of love, although it may not be executed very well!

I am also going to get into jewellery making. Lily's necklace upthread inspired me.

So excited about my friend's pregnancy. She has been warm, generous and loving when everyone around her became pregnant. None of us knew how much it was hurting.

Reading (even non alcohol related books) are great to. Like get stuck into a good thriller and lose yourself in a book. I love doing that. I done Dry January 3 years ago (i think I was trying to prove a point). I managed 2 weeks and I had a sneaky one but still for the whole of January i only drank twice and read 3 books. I got totally lost in my books and it was great. I had really awful sweats the first few nights and was very agitated and my husband gave me a few massages (this also helped a great deal) mix lavender oil with massage oil and honestly your whole body just feels like it's sinking into an amazing cloud xx

That's gream slim. Congrats to your friend. She must be delighted

Thanks!! It is so exciting. :) She is 43 like me. :)

Massages..... ah, bliss.

Id love to get into yoga/meditation but not quite confident enough to join a class. But ive heard it makes you feel amazing. Not sure I have the mindset for meditation though. Mind you not sure I have the body or stamina for yoga either lol

Ahh that's lovely Slim :) congratulations to your friend

I listen to alot of meditation things online. I like Tara Brach.I go to sleep to her almost every night. You can listen to them here;

www.tarabrach.com/

Also I do beginners yoga with Tara Stiles.... they are only 10 minutes long or so. That is about all I can handle!

www.youtube.com/user/TaraStilesYoga

Thanks Lou. :)

Halle, Headspace is very good - there is a 10 session free starter - you can get it on Google play

Slim, that is so lovely about your friend :)

Thanks for the recommendations. I feel like I'm finally pulling my head out the sand and accepting what ive never been able to accept or more like never wanted to accept xx

Really lovely news about your friend slim I am 43 and sometimes , secretly I wonder about another (my granny had one at 44!) but realistically I'm far too tired!!

Good on you halle

DH is all excited and on his way home - he has been told he has passed his thesis and therefore his MSc with distinction - so we are going out for tea with the kids. Have a lovely evening everyone.