Financial Abuse - AlmostFreeMo - Part 4

[AlmostFreeMo]

Next Fred...

I feel bad asking friend, she doesn't really have space for us. Other one said her DC is unwell so not good either. Shelter not calling back.

PM ed you Mo

At the end of the day Mo you can start claiming tax credits as a single parent NOW, you don't even need to tell him - the amount he is putting on the food card will be less the maintenance you should receive.

Just keep very accurate records of what you receive etc. Basically you could claim that the current system of him topping up the card and giving the bare minimum is a private maintenance agreement. You are no longer a couple end of, you will never be living with him as a partner again. You provide no domestic services for him so you are living as a single parent.

KOKO

Mo, he may be going out tonight again tonight, clearly you are at saturation point with his fuckwittery, but you can go home & straight to bed with the kids. Don't panic...

a note, re declaring yourself as single, legal aid may depend on living with him/being in relationship with him when you apply.

Hello Mo. I have read your threads and I'm so disappointed to be the same species as your husband. Would you consider starting crowd funding to pay for the down payment for your solicitor? Are you N,S,E or west UK?

if you consider crowd funding, check what the conditions are, (they must take an admin fee ?) as personally some people like me, would be able to donate direct & save you a few £

I would donate as well. have pm'd you Mo

Mo I'm in the South East, if you need somewhere to be, lots of wine available

Can I come too Dolly
Mo, if I win big on the lotto this week I will buy you a house, promise.
Do the children have savings and can you access them for a loan? obviously you would pay it back once the house is sold, desperate times do call for desperate measures.

Mo,

a ) you have got a long way.

B), providing him with the detail provides the evidence.

C) sell the wine? It is presumably a joint asset...but make it clear you are only selling it becUse the children and you are desperate.

D) do you have a spare bedroom, could you get a lodger in while he is away?

E) birthdays can be expensive, but can you cut back a bit? I know it sounds exactly what you don't want to do, And why you are fighting, but if a choice between food ( basic), clothes/ uniform and party, you need to appear reasonable.

F) ask the SH mediator what you have to do to get access to his financial records. V important. You may need some sort of enforcement order. There's something v odd going on here. He's either a sociopath and needs putting away, or he is doing something odd with the money.

Finally, breathe, visualise, cherish yourself, write a few bullet points on what I shall enjoy in three years time , 2 years time, 6 months time...

It's not easy to find somewhere for three kids and an adult to stay at short notice. We'll have to go home.

Oh, and yes, email copies of everything in advance". Also think up the questions you want to ask in ad pavane with a factual resume of the position. Even though she won't read until just before or even during the first five minutes if your meeting, it will save time and create focus. I used to do this with DS's consultants and we got through a heck of a lot more than we would hàve otherwise.

Do you have access to

Joint savings, childrens savings, a credit card?

Could someone loan you some money (stay in a travel lodge?)

Go to your parents?

Mo you do have choices just give us the nod. Let someone sort it you have enough on your plate x

Have a duvet picnic in your bed at home. Huge fun. Door locked to make a cave.

Can a friend go home with you and stay a while?

Hi OP
Please excuse the thread interruption.
We do advise all our members to be aware that not everyone on t'internet is who they say they are, and that, although we're awed daily by the astonishing support our members give each other through life's trickier twists and turns, we'd always caution anyone never to give more of themselves to another poster, emotionally or financially, than they can afford to spare.
Kindest to youOP and hope you can get this all sorted
MNHQ

Duly noted Olivia...

BUT this is exceptional circumstances!!!! Mos EX is an arse of the highest order.

Mo, i've been there and done that, it's scary...very scary...my ex wouldn't do mediation either and was showed to be the prat he is/was.

I would support you in anyway possible...we are all here for you.
take care.

I understand that MNHQ have to remind us of the perils, but if i had your account details Mo, it would be my pleasure to make a contribution to the SHL fund, no strings attached. It would be in the spirit of thee but for the grace of god go ai.

There may be others on here who would feel the same. Could we make it happen?

If Mo says yes I'm sure we could rally the troops. I just don't think she's able to make big decisions at the moment, she sounded quite over whelmed earlier. I woulnt want to unless she agreed though , it's important she feels in control when things are so much out of her control. I know few of us have offered so far.

Now he's threatening to call the police or social services on me! Part of me wants him to!

Call police about what? Your ability to provide invoices? Or something else happen?

On what grounds is he threatening to report you?

For not bringing the children home. Still at
Friends.

Glad you still out, can you stay?