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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

I'm about to lose my mind here. I think DH is going to leave me tonight..

995 replies

garlicbreathing · 25/04/2016 16:35

DH has been uncharacteristically cold towards me for the past week or so. I had had a bad week as I had AF (we have been ttc for 16 months, and now under the care of the fertility clinic) and it pretty much devastated me. I had no sympathy from DH, we've barely spoke.
It's came to a head when I apologised on Friday, and I told him I was upset with his lack of affection, and he continues to be so cold. I questioned him about whether I did something, or if he is upset about something but he denied anything was wrong. I asked if he loves me, he said he did. He shrugged off cuddles on Saturday morning.

I gave him space yesterday, and slept in the spare room, but I woke up incredibly anxious about what is wrong so I sent him a text telling him that whatever it is, we must talk tonight. He responded in the afternoon, agreeing that we do need to talk.
I was a state in work, I generally always think the worst, so I asked him if it was serious, if he wants to leave me. All he has responded is that we will talk tonight. I asked to get away from work early as I was on the verge of tears, so now I'm sat at home waiting for him to arrive back.

I just don't know what to do. I think this might be the end of my world and I just don't know how I could continue to go on if this is actually happening to me. I hope and pray that it's to do with the ttc, and hes just wanting to take a break from it. But I think maybe it's just broke him and he doesn't love me anymore.

OP posts:
Cocolepew · 25/04/2016 19:25
Flowers
Peppaismyhomegirl · 25/04/2016 19:27

My ex husband used to do this it was horiffic.
Calm down, this will all go better if you are calm and can talk rather than argue.
Listen to him. Listen to Everything he has to say and take you time to think about it. He owes you that.
Just stay calm. Im sure it can be sorted out but by not screaming and arguing and listening to him you will have a better understanding of where he's at.
Then it will be your turn to talk to him, you can tell him how cruel he's been then

enfru · 25/04/2016 19:27

I really hope he's come home now and it isn't what you were fearing. He definitely could've reassured you earlier though

littlepooch · 25/04/2016 19:27

Hope you are ok and it isn't what you fear. You do need to talk though even if it's just about the whole TTC journey (which can be really tough and put pressure on the strongest of relationships)

Thanks
SeraOfeliaFalfurrias · 25/04/2016 19:28

I hope you're okay, OP. Hugs

HeffalumpHistory · 25/04/2016 19:30

Hope everything has been sorted out & you're ok, op!

lins5000 · 25/04/2016 19:30

I hope you are ok and it's not what you think. It's not great being in that situation and talking about it will at least get you both to voice your opinions x

curlywurly82 · 25/04/2016 19:31

Thinking of you OPThanks

cally0 · 25/04/2016 19:32

Hope you're ok. It's unfair of him to keep you waiting like this...Thanks

juststoppit · 25/04/2016 19:33

Just another message of support, OP. You sound like a lovely person, hope things work out for you.

gonetoseeamanaboutadog · 25/04/2016 19:34

How horrible for you Flowers

PPie10 · 25/04/2016 19:34

I hope you're okThanksit's cruel to leave you hanging like this knowing how distressed you are at the moment. A quick 'nothing too serious' or something at least to not let you go insane with worry. A caring person wouldn't do that to someone.

Falling270 · 25/04/2016 19:36

Hope you're ok OP?

Falling270 · 25/04/2016 19:37

Hope you're ok OP?

Falling270 · 25/04/2016 19:37

Hope you're ok OP?

NotQuiteJustYet · 25/04/2016 19:37

Flowers Thinking of you OP, no matter what tonight brings you have plenty of support here from us.

It's massively unfair to keep you waiting and to let it play on your mind like this.

loveliesbleeding1 · 25/04/2016 19:37

Hope all is well. Flowers

BiftasWifta · 25/04/2016 19:41

Hope you're ok x

Joysmum · 25/04/2016 19:42

What loving partner could make their OH suffer like this. If I knew my DH was upset I would not let him stew whilst I went out with a mate Angry

Falling270 · 25/04/2016 19:43

Sorry! Don't know that posted multiple times!Blush

TheoriginalLEM · 25/04/2016 19:43

Standing with you op.

One thing - he needs to explain why he thinks it is okay to leave you waiting like this.

99percentchocolate · 25/04/2016 19:44

Hope you are ok x

Finola1step · 25/04/2016 19:44

Hope all is ok Garlic.

It may be that he really hasn't taken your "Are you going to leave me?" question seriously.

WipsGlitter · 25/04/2016 19:45

I can we where he's coming from not wanting to have a deep and meaningful over text.

It does sound as if you are maybe a bit high maintenance and with the TTC it's all getting to you both.

Coconutty · 25/04/2016 19:46

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.