Jump right in! It's Dating Thread 102

[IToldYouIWasFreaky]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP.

Handy if you're at Waterloo in about half an hour, give me a wave! I know what you mean about music - sometimes I think it's silly to put too much emphasis on music taste, but it's been a huge passion for over 30 years.

Foxtrot, such a dilemma when you like the profile but you're not sure you could be attracted to them. Are yoi going to message a bit and see how you feel?

Anna good luck tonight. How did a non-date turn into a date?

Harriet is his child very young?

Welcome callow. Wow to being happily single for 10 years. I take my hat off to you, sounds very liberating!

The build up to the bacon date is phenomenal! .

handy I'm going to handle realthing with care. I know there is a mutual spark (he's tried it on before when we've been drinking at a party). He's a good looking guy, if he wants something he needs to step up and not try and randomly pull me when pissed. He's not a FWB type guy, I would fall too hard. If that's all he's looking for then he can continue to admire from afar.

harriet I'm another one who bluntly thinks he is simmering bullshitting you. I worked from home this week, was on a conference call (muted), had a convo with my kids and replied to a text. NO ONE is ever too busy to reply to a text. Zero excuse. Definitely do not send long texts, most men don't actually like them. If you are going to text, keep them brief and make him work to get more from you.

fox and gold thanks. Not sure how real the RL irons are tbh. It may all be in my head!

ash I'm fairly brutal and would just leave it. I still subscribe to the they know how/ where to find you. But if you want to do something I'd leave all matches as they are and message jokingly...

anna how come it's turned into a date?

I'm hopeless at doing personal messages but I'm avidly following this thread and everyone's dates.

As I predicted, I bottled out of the exclusivity chat last night but he actually volunteered that he doesn't want to date anyone else at the moment. I smiled serenely while doing cartwheels of joy in my mind!

Fantastic jollyp job done hey!!

to Goldfish from King's Cross.

It turned into a date -
Him - I'm coming off POF for a while I can't remember what he said but something about it being dismal
Me - I'm sorry to hear that, take care of yourself
Then a brief conversation followed which ended with me saying as he's local and I could do with a drinking buddy to let me know if he ever fancied a drink. I live out in the sticks ere be dragons so I really could do with someone to go for a drink with sometimes. We arranged the drink for tonight.

Then we talked on the phone last night and he's keen. So he would like it to be a date. I've been clear that it isn't because that takes the pressure off me! So it probably is a date but I'm pretending it isn't. We'll meet up and see what happens. He seems nice.

Another one excited for the Bacon Premiere!! Good luck Freaky!!

Ash if you work together I bet it should be very easy for him to find your details. So maybe you could just delete him on Tinder and see if he tracks you down. Perhaps send something like "don't like chatting on Tinder, you know where to find me ;)" if you are afraid you brushed him off a bit? That should be a pretty accurate measure of how interested he is. In the meantime, have a look around for new and shiny irons, you never know

Harriet trust your gut if it is telling you something is off, it probably is.

Goldfish that is a nice bunch of irons!

Jollyp yay on date! I am scheduling date 2 with KarmicIron in the hope I get physically attracted to him. Good to hear it does happen! Can I ask what changed for you or if he did something?

Haha I like that date/non-date Anna!

jollyx we had a very open and explicit conversation about sex (what we liked and so on) on the phone after date 1 - not sure why, it just sort of happened - and he suddenly became more appealing. Then when we actually started kissing on date 2 it was amazing.

Eek, I am not sure KarmicIron can handle a sex conversation, he is a bit shy. I think that is my problem actually - he is not forward enough (asked first before snogging, kept his hands in check the entire time, cuddled me etc). Not that I want him jumping my bones in the middle of the street like MrOrganizedYogi did but there is a happy medium.. He is a very good kisser though, so I am hoping next time he won't handle me like a porcelain doll.
Sorry TMI maybe, I needed to get that out Maybe I should call TinyGrey after all haha

Afternoon all! Looking forward to date updates later!! I'm still feeling a bit sad over the last idiot I dated (and annoyed hes still showing as a top prospect in pof) I've got a couple of newbies I'm chatting to so will see where they lead if anywhere. One has probably put me off a bit by messaging back too quick - never happy!!

Goldfish I will continue chatting and see what happens. After all it could turn out like JollyP and the attraction grow! I'm so pleased to hear about your date JollyP and the fact he's volunteered the info that he's not interested in dating anyone else.

Quiet iron wise here but I'm having an evening with friends. Might have a cheeky swipe later.

I don't know what they base their top 10 prospects on Brightmoon but I wouldn't set a lot of store by it.
In the past I've been out with men who were perfect for me on paper but irl no fizzle or sparkle.

Thanks ladies. I feel abit ashamed to admit this! But as we snapchat each other too, I keep looking at his score...he may take ages to open my snaps and reply, but his score never goes up until he opens mine and must be opening others at the same time (rather than opening others and ignoring mine) so he must just be shit with his phone

my god I feel so embarrassed to admit my stalker levels

I need a strong drink to wash this embarrassment away!

Looking forward to reading the date updates tonight!

I've no idea what top prospects is set by but I wish his face would disappear from my list!!

Harriet never be ashamed of stalking...although I don't use snap chat so I didn't understand the comment! Enjoy your strong drink!! If he isn't going to be a good catch...someone else will!

Just had message from Bacon saying he's on his way...This is actually going to happen!

Good luck and enjoy!!

O.M.G freaky

You have to give us a loo update. Even if it's a one worder!!!!

Freaky this will be one of the most anticipated loo updates ever!!

God I know! Can't think my biggest worry is disappointing you lot!

Oh Freaky thinking of you & Hoping the date will be utterly lovely... We are all with you! :)

Goldfish I mostly like Americana(?) The National (seeing them at Latitude), the Delines (not here this year as willy touring with his other band - which is the one M likes best so I'm 99% confident he'll be at that gig), hurray for the riffraff (seeing them in July) ,war on drugs, also eg Richard Hawley & everything at Green Man which is the loveliest festival :)

I find myself backsliding & pining for M again :( I di cerely hope if I see him at that gig that it will burst this bubble.... An iron I could get any enthusiasm for would help but no sign of that

Anyway I'm going to a party in York that I didn't really want to go to tonight to keep busy & maybe it will be fun...

Looking forward to the updates, especially from the non date Hahahaha!

Have a great evening ocelot you deserve it

Yay, Freaky! Am in this evening and will be spending my time waiting for an update from you! (Saddo who has no dating life of her own at the moment). Anna, I'll also be waiting eagerly to hear how your non-date/date goes.

Handy, you must live the other side of London from me. I had visions of us both being at Waterloo and both carrying a Twix bar around so we'd recognise each other... (nb I had a few too many cocktails during lunch with friend, so am aware that even though that idea sounds great to me, it might not to anyone who's sober!)

Brightmoon, I'm not at all impressed by the top prospects on POF. But yes, I can understand it's not much fun seeing his face come up when you're trying to move on.

Ocelot, so jealous of you going to Latitude. I nearly went last year (glares at Mr C who didn't get his childcare sorted out). This year I'm going to Glastonbury - can't wait! Richard Hawley's playing and I listened to his stuff for the first time this week and really liked it. I don't know the Delines - will give them a listen. Sorry that you're feelings sad about M. It's tough to get over someone you like so much, but I've found that gradually, over time, it gets easier (with a few backward steps now and again). Perhaps there'll be some lovely single men at the party tonight?

Brightmoon, re top prospects on POF - I think you can remove 'top prospects' from your list by clicking on the little cross on the top right hand corner - at least I can on my iPad anyway.

Ooh enjoying living vicariously through the dating ladies tonight! Good luck girls.

As a slightly related aside, what do you tell irons you are up to when you are not up to anything. For example I am sitting in this evening with my jammies on and hair in a ball on top of my head. I'm planning on a large glass of prosecco and my 8 year old and I are ordering Chinese. MrComputer asked me if I had exciting plans tonight and not wanting to sound like a saddo (and utilising MH a bit) I lied and said I was going out for Chinese and wine with some friends (very loosely base on fact there)

Is this a bad thing??

(Also, now I can't message him for a good while and I want to )