The Brave Babes Battle Bus - Springing Into Some Warmer Weather, Staying Sober Togeher

[Mouseface]

Hi, tis me, Mouse

Welcome to the Bus. We're delighted to have you here :) Not because if you're new to the Babes you are here for help, but because we welcome every kind of drinker. And for all of the reasons life throws at you.

Those that do drink, those that don't drink and of course those who do but don't want to say just how much..............

We've all had our own personal Groundhog Day , some still are and don't want to remain trapped in the same cycle day in, day out, and some still are and want to be which is fine and why we're here.

To talk, to listen, to just be us, like you are YOU. You never know, one day you might just want to wake up on a different day? :) There's no judging here, no 'sides.

After all, something made you click on and read this :)

Come say hi! We even do & if you're super quick!!

And if you want to see what we got up to in the last thread, have a look RIGHT HERE

And this is where our adventure began, almost six years ago now!!

ALMOST SIX YEARS AGO...........

lala I remember times when I was two bottles of wine down and thinking it wasn't effecting me. Then I'd go outside and fall over, or send an email (which in hindsight was ridiculously drunk), or call a friend who would end up massively worried about how I sounded. Those 'non-drunk' times were the occasions when I took the biggest risks, or when I suffered the biggest blackouts and subsequent memory loss. Please, be careful. You are poisoning your system.

If the drink's not having the effect of making you drunk then what is the point of having any more? Brush your teeth, drink some water, eat some toast

lala no need to apologise to us - we understand - we are simply observing this unfolding and we care.....

ma's right lala and it's only because we care. Get yourself off to bed. You'll feel better for it in the morning.

will check in with us when you want to

will I hope that you can keep posting - let it all out here, there is always someone to listen to you.

Hadn't seen your post venus when I posted. Very well put.

lala don't apologise. Just go to bed and be safe.
will you the same.
The bus will still be here tomorrow

Thank you all, you are so bloody brilliant. Going to let the dog out (aka get soaking wet) then put myself bed. It worries me that I can drink the best part of two bottles of wine and 'be fine'. Argh, you are all right. Bedtime. Sorry again.

lala never be sorry on here, listen babe I've done way worse than drinking 2 bottles of wine in my room.

My Dad once said to me he wouldn't mind if I drank wine and danced around singing and being happy. What he couldn't process is that I would drink, weep, be horrible to everyone or drink myself unconscious. Then the next day or days fallout. He just couldn't see why I kept doing something that caused me nothing but pain!!!

I don't know either, I guess there in lies the problem.

I'm in no position to lecture you guys or anyone else, I just feel so much affection for all the babes in here, I guess I'm just trying to stop your lift going down as far as mine did, it's very dark and scary in the basement.

Love and hugs to everyone reading this post xxxx

rarity, how are you lovely? Not heard from you in a while.

will I do hope you're ok, please post.

lala hope you're tucked up in bed, big hug.

Off to bed now, night babes.

Hi, I'm not sure if some of you babes remember me, I was on these threads a few months ago and then I went AWOL. I did well (mainly because I was at home so couldn't drink) and as a result thought everything was ok and decided to stop going counselling. Me and my friends have made things up now (kind of) but I still feel a need to hide alcohol. I've told them I'm fine now but I'm not too sure, I just don't want the elephant in the room feeling that them knowing about my drinking has had in the past. For some reason, I snuck to tesco today and got two bottles of vodka. I'm on my fourth glass of vodka and coke now but feel disappointed in myself. I lied to my friend and I'm sure the taxi driver heard the bottles clank in my bag. I don't even know why I'm posting on here, because I'm not ready to stop drinking and I don't think I'm an alcoholic, but I'm crying while I drink and I feel so ashamed - I feel like I have to hide the bottles amongst tee shirts in my wardrobe because my friends won't approve, and I can't blame them I suppose. I don't know why I'm pouring my heart out on here because I'm not at the drinking every night stage, and I'm not ready to stop drinking. And I don't want to disappoint my one friend - we had a heart to heart and she admitted the arguments etc were a result of her tough love which was hard for her apparently (harder for me), I think I'm just broken.

Hi made nice to have you back, please always feel like you can post on here whatever is your current drinking pattern.

I hope you feel ok this morning and a bit happier about things.

All other babes, big hug and hope you are ok

I ended up having a couple of glasses last night, all going well and off to bed then dh gets in and asks if I want to have a drink with him. Damn it. But back on the bus now and TODAY I WILL NOT DRINK.

Morning Claret, looks like we are both up early this morning :) hope all babes are feeling OK this morning?

made good to hear from you. I was actually thinking about you the other day and wondering how you were.
Lovely sunny day here. Full of promises not to drink, to lose weight, to get some exercise, to visit dad....wonder how many of them I will keep?

Morning ma isn't it lovely to see the sun and the clear blue sky

I find it helps me to have a co-ordinated plan that ties your aims in together e.g. long walk to the shops (exercise) buy fizzy water, lots of veg, nice summery fruit (healthy). Walk home and make a pot of lentil and veg soup, prepare a bowl of strawberries. Phone a friend and arrange to meet at a coffee house at 4pm. Go to visit dad at 3pm, followed immediately by coffee with friend. Go home and eat healthy soup and lovely fruit (which are already prepped and waiting).

All much better than the alternative of going to visit Dad, feeling sad / upset / stressed / angry / frustrated, then going shopping in that mood and buying wine and chocolate, driving home and consuming the lot. As MIFLAW used to say - put as much effort into planning your non-drinking as you would into your drinking...

Have a good day, my friend.

made is there any chance that you can start your counselling again? This is your final term at uni? so it's going to come with some pressures and you need some good and healthy ways to get through that. Honestly drinking, and being secretive about your drinking is not going to help. Things with your friends are back on a more even keel, but they too are going to be under pressure so it won't take too much to disrupt the balance - I remember that in the final term even dirty dishes left in a sink overnight could cause a massive escalating row. A good counsellor should be someone that you can speak to about all of this - someone you can tell about buying vodka and hiding it, someone who can help you with short term ways to cope, and longer term was to consider underlying issues.

At the end of the day, you can't hide your drinking from yourself.

Your best chance of success is to put yourself first for once ma x

Did your sister come and visit? I can't remember when that was supposed to be happening but I hope you had a good time together and some laughs.

Claret the ww got you at the last minute! She snuck up on you in the guise of your dh. She's such a cunning old tart

Never mind. Two glasses? Meh. That's nothing compared to how your weekend could have gone. You could be hungover and feeling like you might as well carry on.

But you're not. You're fresh as a daisy and ready to fill the day with whatever you want to do. This evening will probably be the time when she tries to lie her way back into your life so plan something, be prepared, batten down the hatches and ride out the storm. (How many metaphors can I get in here? )

made it's good to hear from you again, we've all been hoping that you're ok. I know you don't want to stop drinking and that you don't consider that you have a problem with alcohol but it doesn't seem to make you very happy my lovely. Secret drinking never does. It just makes you feel guilty even when you've nothing to be guilty about x

And to elba coming off night duty, to will and lala - hope you're feeling ok this morning, please come and let us know, and even more to all the lovely babes who post on here - what a great community of supportive caring people.

Hi venus, crossed posts with you there. I have beautiful blue sky too which is very welcome and it's so warm sitting here in the sunshine (indoors but still). Hints of summer are in the air...

Thanks Venus good tips. The problem is that no effort goes into planning drinking. Just open bottle and drink. But I will try and walk more today, wash the car by hand, do stuff to keep me moving....

faire a cunning old tart indeed...stupidly let my guard down and she got me. She won't get me today though! Thanks for the support and encouragement

ma, lots of lovely fresh sunny air and exercise, sounds like a good plan to me!!! I'm off out for a walk shortly, the sun is shining here too. I've been walking more lately and have found it really lifts my mood.

obrigada morning! Hope you have a lovely Saturday planned.

Morning....sorry about last night. I got drunk and passed out. Feel very ashamed this morning and embarrassed of my secret divulging

will and lala hope you are both ok. I caught up on the thread in the early hours and could sense how sad you both felt. It just brought home to me how much we are using alcohol to try and make ourselves feel better whilst knowing it makes us feel worse, it's like self medication and punishment rolled into one.

made hi! I've been thinking about how to say this without sounding patronising (I don't mean to be, and if it comes across that way let's blame my post night shift brain!) but the last time I properly attempted to address my drinking I was about the same age as you, and I deeply regret not persevering. At that point I already knew deep down it was an issue, and was hiding alcohol and drinking in secret most nights. I would also regularly get so drunk I couldn't look after myself or remember anything about the night before. My attempts to cut back didn't last long (I tried to do it on my own) and my head went firmly back in the sand and things just carried on. Fast forward over a decade and it's still the same but I'm facing up to some potentially serious health problems, and the drinking patterns are just even more engrained. You have far more insight than I had back then, so whilst your last term at uni may not be the right time to properly tackle this, please listen to the part of you that realises your relationship with alcohol isn't great. After all you wouldn't be posting here, hiding booze or feeling so low whilst drinking if it wasn't an issue for you would you?

Im finishing my drink and going to bed in a minute. Tomorrow morning is AF morning...have to keep writing that or I will back out! Sorry not to name check but thank you all for being so lovely and supportive, hope you have a lovely Saturday!

Night night xxx

will glad you're ok. You have nothing to apologise or feel ashamed for. Sending you huge hugs and lots of xxx

will no need to apologise, I'm glad you're ok I was worried about you

will thank you for coming back and posting - I know it would have been much easier to hide your head this morning. You're a brave babe for not running away, and we do understand.

I guess many of us have secrets, and if this thread seems safe enough to divulge a little (even if it is because we're drunk) then at least that's one place where we can start to bring dark things into the light. Sometimes letting a little light in shows us the true horror and pushes us into action, and sometimes the light shows us that the scary shadow was longer and blacker than the actual 'thing'. Either way, it's a bit of movement.

I hope the sun is shining some real daylight on you this morning. Get outside, feel a little warmth on your face, a dose of vitamin D, and take acre of yourself.