Welcome to the House of Fun (and positivity!) - It's dating thread 100

[IToldYouIWasFreaky]

The Rules:

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin.
3. Do not invest emotionally too soon.
4. It's all BS until it actually happens.
5. Trust your gut instinct.
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault.
7. You are the prize-they should be trying to impress you.
8. If it's not fun, stop.
9. Loo update is mandatory.

10. No dating the thread. 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches (aka WMLB), and take from it what you will. 12. Don't serve up moose burgers on the first date (although this is still in debate right now) 13. Matthew Hussey also very useful. And very easy on the eye even if you don't find him any good. 14. IF THEY SAY THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP, THEY DON'T WANT A RELATIONSHIP.

I believe he's some dating type guru I don't know much about him am sure someone else can explain or link you too him.

And. Waving has done the honors!

waving well that's that. He's out of your system. Good stuff. He was never worth it. But you can see that now. Because you have MTG. MTG would never throw you out of bed. An he's growing a beard for you. Now that. Is true love.

When I speak on the phone with gentle That's how I feel. Like it's a normal, healthy grown up relationship with no games and no second guessing or treading on eggshells.

Makes me wonder why I put up with so many fucked up guys in the past...

Here's to No More Games bit early but what the heck...

I have date with gentle tonight.

Anyone else?

Sometimes it takes being a bit drunk to step outside your comfort zone and be brave waving although there's a fine line.... Sometimes I wake up and think shit shit shit, what did I do on Facebook last night. Sometimes I write myself a note saying "don't post drunk shite on facebook" Haha.

Thanks for the can't too, jolly I'm actually going to try and use that.

Talking of BookFace Nannys I saw your pic on fb of Gentle. He does look like a lovely human being and you look very suited.

waving it sounds like the Soho door has closed and you are able to go forward. That's great.

I so want to be Twix's girl. Please, universe, can that happen??

Thanks for the cbt tip was what that was meant to say.

Thanks handy

waving it hasn't all gone to pot. You're just not dealing with a tosser this time. That said, it doesn't harm to keep 'perceived value' in your head at all times (my major downfall)

waving it seems maybe when there is a lot of mutual attraction and nobody is putting a foot wrong it feels very like you are in the MH Sin Bin.... because there is no need for a strategy? Welcome to the 'is-this-the-beginning-of-a-relationship Insecurity Bench. I live here right now. My new home. What the heck happens now eh????

I'm six weeks in with gentle and we have had some great heart to heart chats. But I still get massively angsty now and again. I reckon that's kind of normal. I don't think I'll self destruct though. I'm learning to trust my judgement, like myself and allow myself to love him.

Waving I glad you messaged Soho, if it's helped you get your head straight over him. MTG sounds lovely. And you're his girl

I think I'm going to try POF (as well as OKC) - when I looked before, it seemed like you couldn't read messages unless you paid, is that right?

Yeh, I think it's for the best too.

YOu could have been comparing the two irons as you went along. This is a reminder that soho is a little bit too far up his own deriere navel gazing while he's there.

Sorry, maybe that's harsh. I just wouldn't want to queue up to date him. MTG on the other hand!!! I'm weljel

I think its good that you messaged soho Waving at least now you can concentrate on MTG without any what ifs.. As far as MH tactics for weekends away etc, Is it not about just making sure that you still have your 'own life'? Don't give everything up for one person, enjoy being with him, but enjoy your own life too. Which isn't tactics, it makes sense really.. ( obviously, I may be completely wrong though, I'm still learning!)

Handy i don't think it'll be too long before you're his girl either

Jolly Daydreaming= good

Bat. POF is completely free ( I'm pretty sure) to both send and reply to messages.

This is definately the lucky thread, I was contacted last night on a site I'd forgotten to cancel. We ended up chatting all evening and I even used some MH tactics which worked really well . Unfortunately we then discovered we work in the same field, he wouldn't then stop talking about work, and I mean he was like a dog with a bone! I think he kind of gauged my lack of enthusiasm by the end...but it was fun none the less, and unexpected...onwards!

Wow. He is planning ahead waving

You've known each other about a week? I would proceed with caution. I met a guy over Christmas like that and couldn't hack it. He was too full on. However.... Enjoy the attention. If you're feeling it, go with it. But maybe say something about discussing it in a month or so...

Wow Waving that sounds amazing! I agree with what Nanny said about you not dealing with a tosser this time, it can move forwards naturally at its own pace. I would be getting ridiculously excited at this point regarding Copenhagen though and having to remind myself to keep feet on the ground and it's BS until it happens. I'm sure it will happen though, I just wouldn't dare to allow myself to believe it!

My irons are down to two now - one lovely man who lives 130km away but is keen to meet and the other I ended up in a whirlwind of messages, descended into some rather enjoyable sexting...then he sent me a photo which looks nowhere near as attractive as his tinder photo . Note to self - never swipe right when they only have one slightly grainy photo. Urgh, that's one iron I'll have to cool!

I have some lovely looking matches though to hopefully turn into something more! Thinking positive! Have a brilliant day everyone.

Morning all!

Handy I agree with this when there is a lot of mutual attraction and nobody is putting a foot wrong it feels very like you are in the MH Sin Bin.... because there is no need for a strategy? Like, you coming off GSM and telling Twix that you'd done that was "against the rules" but actually, it doesn't matter because he is a genuinely good guy who is genuinely into you. And when you are in that situation, there's no need for rules. Just going with the flow and reminding yourself that you are the prize and all that good stuff!

Waving Ha to MTG growing a beard for you!

Foxtrot You're souding more positive this morning, I hope those irons pay off...

So, I had a few messages from Bacon last night. Really wasn't expecting it, so that was nice. Nothing heavy, just some banter. I'll leave it to him to suggest meeting up.

No other irons, not really looking (other than checking Tinder). It's nice to have a bit of a break!

Morning all!

Am having a bit of a downer today having cleared out my irons. So summary.

scot disappeared off the face of this earth since I didn't respond to his last text on Tuesday. His text was a closed statement about something so didn't invite a response. However shows my instinct with him was spot on. Game player.

tree got a tongue lasting yesterday. He told me he misses me / adores me. I told him to tell his wife and baby those things.

An ex also contacted me on FB (I've reverted to my maiden name). He's happily married....wanted to meet up....

I'm resolutely trying to remain positive and not go down the route of all men are shits.....but it's exhausting.
Sorry it's a me post. Need today me thinks and all will be well.

Sassy have a reassuring shoulder squeeze. I find better stuff happens to me if I can get out of that 'all men are bastards, and only want a shag, preferably with a woman 15 years younger than them' mindset. Not all men are like that, I just need to believe it!

Jolly strangely enough I've got to go and see my brother which is very near Mr Journos flat on Sunday. Could text asking if he wants to meet. Really a bit ambivalent about it though if he wanted to meet me and text he'd do that right?!

TooSassy sorry re your irons or what they were after but it's good you've figured them out sooner rather than later.

IToldYou that's nice to get messages from
Bacon even if banter... It shows interest. I am similar to you no irons in fire and not really interested either!

DrFoxTrot that's such a bummer re the other man's pic not being so good! At least you have another iron there...

Waving have to say I agree with Nanny seems a bit fast to suggest Copenhagen (I think the music festival is Roskilde which is just outside Copenhagen and by the way both are very nice... Was last there almost 15 years ago!).

I'm off to I think a Lovestruck event in City next Thursday where others meet in bar (half price drinks) why not a chance to get my flirt on!

Good luck on everyone's dates later if they have them.