DRY 11

[TeapotDictator]

Time for a shiny new thread.

Old thread here

Evening all.
lily hope your ok, I don't know your background with your mum and I don't know if you've done this before so apologies if you have, but writing a letter sometimes helps? Or vent here...?
I found mummywasasecretdrinker.. Have been busy reading her blogs now some of the expressions pink clouding, wine witch etc make sense!! I'm not looking forward to hitting 'the wall' though, I thought I was too chirpy about it all! But will plough on, one day at a time!

I nearly forgot to ask, I nearly fainted today in work, I've never fainted before that i can remember has anyone else had this happen or is it totally unrelated? Day 10.

My friend's husband fainted when I ordered a non alcoholic drink in the pub before Sunday lunch - does that count?

Lily it sounds like you're having a rubbish time of it. I hope you're OK. Just go to bed if you haven't already and sod the house, it can wait until you feel better. One thing for sure, you know what won't help xx

Lol absolute I had just drank a peppermint tea so it is possible my body went into shock .

Morning everyone. lily how are you feeling - I hope you're Ok. Thinking of you.

Good morning. Hope you are all well, looking forward to the weekend.

We're going away for a few days to a place that I associate with hangovers : "stocking up" at the beginning with enough wine for the stay, buying 3 times as much in the end after drinking 3 times more than I meant to each night, taking away the rubbish on the way home and being really ashamed of the bottles. Not this time. Tea and happy mornings.

One of the problems is staying in a tiny cottage with a snorer. Just have to think there is no point in having a hangover as well as losing sleep.

Have a good day everyone

Hi don't know if anyone remembers me from the Dry threads last summer? I did two months not drinking then and found it easier than I thought it would be and a total revelation in terms of how I felt, looked etc.

But i went back to drinking, moderately at first but the amount has crept up until a bottle of wine a night is the norm. And so I am back here. Mainly because I am scared about what it is doing to my health but also the example I am setting my kids who are now teens.

Am on day 8. Am taking it a day at a time but have found the habit easy to break so far and haven't been seriously tempted. Sure that will change.

I must admit I am not feeling amazing today. I remember last time days 4 -6 were horrendous but it took me around 10 days to really feel I had cleared it out of my system. Have a low dull headache and my sleep hasn't improved yet - am lying there for ages trying to drop off.

I need to accept I can't moderate. This is my challenge.

Hi Polly, good to see you.

Hi Boodles, how are you today? Still caning the peppermint tea, you devil? ;)

Hi vxa how's everything?

Hi Dvallin, I've been eating everything in sight too... time to take it down a notch today I think

Hi Lily would it help to rant about your mother?

Hi hi hi everyone!

Just some thoughts about, um, self care. I have been making half arsed attempts to do this meditation app thing, that's 20 minutes a day in theory. I also have the exercise thing I'm trying to do. If you reckon it takes around 90 minutes to get to the gym, work out, and get back (actually more like 2 hours) and you are aiming for 3 / 4 times a week; say meditation 20 mins a day; say you want to stretch or do a half hour mini home work out on the "off" days: that adds up to something like 10 or 11 hours a week which is around 90 mins a day.

that is REALLY hard to find. And actually really important! I can't get up 90 minutes earlier, and still be going by the end of the day; it's really hard to find 90 minutes after work, bedtime, housework admin etc.

So this makes me feel better about not getting to it (yesterday was the first day I made it to the gym since Thursday); but also it makes me feel quite angry and challenging about pointless shit (in my opinion) I end up doing at work; and also about dp and his endless time, apparently, to sit on his arse.

so. Thinking about how to think positively but assertively about carving out the time that I need.

In theory I would just be using my old drinking time, but drinking was time I stole from sleep and made me feel shit. I am not sacrificing my sleep now I know how good it feels to get it :)

Working from home makes a huge difference. If I could work from home one more day a week... what would that do for me? Can I swing it?

any tips from you clever ladies about fitting stuff in and staying sane?

Howbad, do you love going to the gym or is there something closer to home or work that you could do and still get some exercise? Just sounds as if the travelling to and from the gym uses a chunk of time.

Hi polly I also tried moderation a while back after 16 dry days - I thought surely that must be enough to break the habit - how wrong I was

Now on Day 9 so just about the same as you.

I have my welcome meeting at the alcohol support service at 2. The idea of having just one of those miniature bottles of wine keeps popping into my head but I WILL resist. This so hard.

lily how are you ?

Vxa2 I did manage moderation for a bit. But what started as one gradually crept up. I did used to be able to drink moderately. When the kids were smaller I could just have one or two glasses. Not sure what changed - may be I need to try and work that one out.

Howbad I work from home a bit and it gives me an extra two hours to fit things in. One thing I have really noticed is that I have had more time this week - am able to be organised the night before (as not slumped/ asleep on the sofa) and so the days start well - have been able to do myself a juice and a decent breakfast every morning rather than spending time sorting out debris from the previous evening. And the house is sorted. That's made a real difference to my mood.

Hi all! biggles here! I had forgotten that.username 😁I am amazingly still doing OK! Just coming up to 2 and a half years and really really OK - happier than I have ever been since I was 16
So happy this thread is still going xxx

Hey Molly Thanks for dipping your head in & huge congrats on 2 1/2 years!!
Welcome Polly I remember you from last summer :)
All good here - supping a Bavaria after a bath after a run

I am slobbing around thinking I must go for a run😊but have left it too late now as have to.pick dd up from her friends house! I will definitely go tomorrow 😉

howbad that is EXACTLY my problem. I need more time to do the things that I NEED to do to support my sobriety - and your estimate of 90 minutes a day is about right. I too have no clue how I am going to do / achieve that.

One option is to make my (lazy arse) DP do more ... I have tried this for > 5 years... The second option is to make my three kids do more - 17, almost 14, and 11. Ironically this causes me mote stress and more time trying to MAKE them do it. I have a wonderful cleaner / ironer but I am afraid she is about to move on to better things - which is great for her, but shit for me ....

Hi polly - I'm a second timer too ... Did 8 months in 13/14 - then got sucked back in... This 'detox' has been easier (day 28) because I know I CAN do it; and the longer term benefits are clearer. I also think I will be stronger knowing that I cannot moderate. So even one drink is a complete no. Under no circumstances can I drink.

biggles waves xxxx I'm so impressed with you, and you are an inspiration ....

Thank you for your good wishes, I'm much more cheerful today. Took the kids out for the day - and have rejoined the local gym ( comes back to that 90 minutes thing again ) ....

Hope everyone is doing ok - I've kind of forgotten it's Friday actually - 4 weeks ago was my last drink - far too much as usual - ....

I have been doing Headspace and have found it really helpful am on day 40 now of it :) Largely stopped AJ apps as Headspace seems to now do the trick

Not sure what AF day I am on, but started 16 Dec 2015

Life is good :)

Morning all. How are we all?
Feeling good here. Have dropped DD at the stables and done food shop including lots of lovely soft drinks. Usually I would be I bed feeling and looking shit.

Good Morning all
lily glad your feeling better
howbad still on the peppermint tea, I'm such a rebel
Hello everyone
Day 12 here for me, I've been reading sobermummy's blog she's great isn't she it all makes alot of sense! Highly recommend it.
Mainly feeling positive but having moments of feeling down about not being able to drink especially when Facebook memories pop up of nights out. I just have to remember how they end!
I'm also feeling a bit shit because of all the things that could have been a better experience without me drinking mainly all to do with the kids, birthdays, special days etc.
I'm also seeing a friend today just at her house with the kids but these visits would of usually turned into staying for the evening and drinking until the kids got tired and I'd bring them home to Bed then carry on drinking on my own. I'm feeling nervous but determined I think I'll just stop at the shop beforehand and stock up on soft drinks to take.
I haven't ventured to the alcohol free stuff yet, I'm not sure that's a good idea for me just yet..it might be too close to the real thing if that makes sense. What's everyone else's experiences of this?
Hope everyone's ok.xx

vxa have the headaches gone now?

Hello gladistooped 🙋 what's headspace?

It's a mindfulness meditation app. Really great!

I started headspace last night , and I enjoyed it - going to carry on with that, I've also been to tai chi this morning ( which was brilliant although I am bloody unbalanced, very unfit and looked vile in that mirror thing)

Walked the dog with BFF this morning and told her I had not drunk for a month - she has been a big drinking buddy in the past ( but she has a much better off button ) ... Didn't say 'forever' but did say I thought I had a problem with alcohol because I can never stop at one ....

I'm feeling much more energised right now - and recognise this as the start of the pink cloud ( I had this last time too ) I will run with it - because it's nice - but not expect it to last forever !!!

Hi stellar -and welcome :-)

lou who was trying to be dry even though you are not posting I hope you are ok, and racking up the dry days ....

vxa you MUST take care of yourself , physically and mentally. Literally sod everything else. It's hard to withdraw from alcohol physically and emotionally - in the short term physically it's TOUGH ... It's taken me 4 weeks of exhaustion, colds, fatigue, grumpiness , aches and pains and general "can't be arsed" behaviour to get to aBetter place. ( and I take high dose antidepressants) .... Please be very kind to yourself and prioritise whatever your mind and body needs ....
fuzzy I love the look of that mocktail and will be giving it a try later x

boodles think it all through. Play the record to the end .... Then buy lovely AF drinks and state as soon as you get there " I can't drink today because ...... , but I brought this instead " use what ever excuse you want, if she drinks, I personally probably wouldn't be able to stay there, so early in my journey .... And would text someone to call me urgently away ....

( thinking about that it's stupid, because I can sir in a restaurant with others drinking m I can sit in my own home with others drinking, but if I went to a drinking buddies house and she was drinking I wouldn't trust myself at all ) sorry that's rubbish .....

Good luck, and please play the tape to the messy, hungover, regretful end ... for you too xxxxxx

Hi Boodles. Headaches a lot better thanks.

I know exactly what you mean about alcohol free wine etc. I don't think I am ready for that yet either. It is just too close to the real thing.

Does anyone else go to AA? I am considering it but I'm really not sure.