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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Do you know if you're having bad sex?

550 replies

FLAMEinEckItsYuleAgain · 30/12/2006 14:52

Odd conversation with someone the other day... if all you've ever had is bad sex or sex with one person - do you know its bad? Or do you only realise when you get the good stuff?

OP posts:
suzycreamcheese · 02/01/2007 18:48

got limited time..do i have to get my whip out?

VeniVidiVickiQV · 02/01/2007 18:50

I knew it

Its a full moon tomorrow night.........

Papillon · 02/01/2007 18:55

doesn't cut the mustard gave in half way... like bad sex

HappyDaddy · 02/01/2007 19:23

Now I'm lost!

HappyDaddy · 02/01/2007 19:25

Juliette Lewis, now there's a dirty girl.

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 19:27

So, if i'm not getting any, what lovely toys are the best?

suzycreamcheese · 02/01/2007 19:56

am bit lost too HD; i didn't get the film clip

and would like to know more about toys too..the obvious one for the ladies comes in all shapes and sizes, easy to get internet etc..i suppose used to work near brilliant shop but unknowledge really...though have always meant to try those orgasm ball things..

HappyDaddy · 02/01/2007 20:01

Funnily enough the toys meant for blokes area a bit scary!

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 20:02

Whenever I look on those sites there's such a mind boggling array of stuff I end up getting nothing. I always prefer a personal recommendation .

suzycreamcheese · 02/01/2007 20:14

shall we do it for you too sexkitty..!!

have never really bothered with toys for me, cause always had good results with plain ol just me! but quite intriqued too...

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 20:19

yes please!!!!

suzycreamcheese · 02/01/2007 20:22

dont be lazy..ms sexkitty..good lovers are not lazy lovers
get organised w/ your new pal, order it tonight and until it arrives get busy busy busy...

divastrop · 02/01/2007 20:41

for me,good sex is about how you feel about the person youre doing it with,if its an expression of love,then it will be good iyswim.the technical side of things doesnt make much difference ime.

kitty-you say your dp doesnt find pg women attractive...but he loves you and surely must find you attractive?so what difference does being preg make

being preg(especially at this stage)can make things awkward...and i personally now feel like an unattractive lump of non-person who is just existing to grow a baby,but the fact that dp still wants to make love reminds me that i am still me if that makes sense?

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 20:41

Yes m'am (salutes)

divastrop · 02/01/2007 20:43

i have never found toys to be of much use,ive always relied on my right hand and my imagination(and the odd dodgey internet site)when ive been single

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 20:43

Diva, I think it's about me being erm.. well padded shall we say, normally I'm slim. I think dp is a size facsist.

HappyDaddy · 02/01/2007 20:43

sexkitty, consider yourself told.

HappyDaddy · 02/01/2007 20:44

sexkitty, but surely you are different to just any old pregnant woman? you're his partner, so he knows you much better. im sure if he got all fat you wouldn't go off him in the same way.

divastrop · 02/01/2007 20:45

but you are still you,isnt it whats inside that counts or am i a romantic idealist?!

Glassofwine · 02/01/2007 20:48

just stumbled across this thread and wanted to say to sexkitty that I've had three lo's and dh wouldn't touch me sexually when I was pg. Hugs etc no problem, but he just wasn't interested at all. I just wanted to reassure you that we now have a great sex life, in fact there are just 11 months between our last two children, so he was raring to go once I'd stopped being pg. I think it was a psycological thing

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 20:48

Happydaddy that's a nice thought but I think his own sexuality is petty fragile, it must be to be so turned off so easily mustn't it?
You know I used to rant and rage at him about the state of our physical relaitonship , now I've stopped as it doesn't get me anywhere. I just feel so bereft and do wonder what the future holds for us.
Sorry this thread isn't about me

melrose · 02/01/2007 20:50

I often wonder this as only had sex with 2 people (one being my DH) and sometimes think I may be missing out on something but think I love DH too much to try and find out!!

HappyDaddy · 02/01/2007 20:50

Thread is about anyone who wants to post, don't worry kitty.

sexkittyinwaiting · 02/01/2007 20:51

Thanks for that glassowine. I am expecting no.6 so we have had it, but I am also fertile so we haven't had it as much as one might suppose !! Anyway our relationship is in a general pickle, so no hugs forthcoming either.

Glassofwine · 02/01/2007 20:51

Also - Divas I do think you are a little romantic, your earlier post about sex being about how you feel about the person imo a bit idealistic. My exH was crap in bed, sorry but it's true and for the first couple of years I was very much in love with him, but I learnt the art of faking it. I tried talking to him or gently guiding, but other then being so blunt I'd hurt him I just gave up.