Step inside the dating thread, 95

[MissPiggySeeksFrogwithGSOH]

We don't have get through these at speed....

The Rules

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin
3. Do no invest emotionally too soon
4. It's all BS until it actually happens
5. Trust your gut instinct
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you
8. If it's not fun- stop
9. Loo update is mandatory

10. No dating the thread 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches, and take from it what you will

tanya glad you're here! Hope you're feeling better. Sorry to hear about your sad news.

Decided to try OLD again. Just turned 50. FIFTY.
No interest. Apart from someone who is 60.
60 feels so OLD. I don't want to go out with a 60 year old.
No one else is showing any interest.
Does this make me shallow?
Or do I have to accept this is my lot now?

tanya so sorry to hear of you receiving bad news, hope to hear from you soon xx

So, it should be "no dating in thread" Oer!

Well done for being cool waving

Ok. So. Back from the hastily arranged fwb date. And here's the thing:

I ended up being the least prepared and most under-dressed I have ever been for any date ever, as I went straight from work (my work is in and out of houses so dress code is warm, practical and comfy) to a 'going on mat leave' party, then jumped in car to date. Wearing clothes I literally threw on this morning. No make-up.

He, on the other hand, was straight from work wearing a suit and cuff links. I'm a sucker for those....

He started out being quite flirtatious, is very intelligent, wanted to hear all about me and has great conversational skills. As the conversation went on he seemed to pull back from overly-flirtatious mode and became much more relaxed and natural. Like he didn't need to try so hard because we just 'got on'. Yet he was very complimentary about me. In many ways. Was great company and some of the conversation was light-hearted and fun but we both found out quite a bit about each other.

I didn't do a loo update because I was too keen to get back out there

He came across as the most respectful and non pushy guy. Is getting divorced (no kids) and wants to keep things simple. Made things uber comfortable and allowed me to just leave, no expectation of a snog or a grope or anything. This man seems to know how to get into my pants

Dunno what I was expecting. But it was the least fwb type of date I could ever imagine. Ever. Am slightly and very very very much up for date no.2 which will probably be at the weekend!

Very glad I went

What's all that about then?????????????

Slightly concerned about the potential to fall for the guy.

But. Um. Er, going with the flow!!!!

Wow Handy, sounds great! It is scary when you feel like you could fall for a man. Glad there's a second date planned!

tanyadm sorry to hear you've had bad news.

coalfire you can 'spark' a bit more interest with new photos and viewing profiles. To quote the marvellous Twinklestein, there are thousands of men on the internet who only want to date a much younger woman, but most of those men are at home making mashed potato for one. That made me laugh so much. Just be patient....

I asked H if he was seeing anybody else, he's not, phew, couldn't have handled that, and he said that he wouldn't want to jeopardise 'this' by seeing somebody else! So luckily, although we're just going with the flow, he said he thinks we have potential to be happy together. I think that too if I could just remember not to worry. (It'll either work, or it won't work. None of it is a potential disaster. So phew, that's that analysed) He's going back to Ihome for five days now so I won't see him for a while but I feel quite chilled. Terrified but OK. Oh yeh, I told him that I hadn't really had a relationship where I felt there was 'risk' for a long time. I don't think he completely gets it. All of his relationships have been from the heart or not at all. I have been a very weird person with a bizarre relationship history up til now.

waving Oh no, Valentine's day! argh. Is that soon. I will tell H I hate it. I will say ''just be nice to me EVERY DAY"

ps, I thought don't date the thread was like, don't find this thread so entertaining that you forget to log off occasionally, remember to get out there and date so than you can come back and report. Not sit there happily reading about other people's dates...

It's like poetry, we all interpreted that rule differently!

Greetings all from sunny and warm place I cannot disclose without outing myself!

Re the rules:
I read the "no dating the thread" thing as "don't spend your time on here instead of messaging/liking/winking/whatever-ing people on dating sites." Which I tend to have done since the Popcorn disaster.

MOOSE BURGERS: female (short) version should be a spin off on rule 7: let guys enjoy the thrill of chasing the moose down through the woods. DO NOT deliver lovingly made-from-scratch moose burgers. They will taste bland. Or something a lot more punchy am too drunk to figure it out. Which leaves us with what the male version of a moose burger would be.. Any ideas? I think my biggest turn off is being purposely left in the dark re a potential relationship. Maybe men think it makes them look oh so mysterious and untamable?? That is probably my moose burger since my biological clock is ticking like mad

Also read a very interesting article on the give aways that the guy is not ready for a relationship at all or is not ready for a relationship with you today. Will translate and post later on to contribute to our dating-pedia

Waving I find focusing on oneself really good, especially when we are throwing ourselves in the wild world of OLD. After a 4 hours straight yoga session my thighs are burning so much I cannot even find two brain cells to wonder if that guy is going to text me. And that feels awesome.

Coal funnily enough I believe that some numbers of years are more "fruitful" than others. First time I did OLD I had a LOT of messages. Two years later, well not so much. Today I turned a new birthday and WOW, I have so many more matches. It really does not make any sense. Try updating your profile a year above or below shallow, me? Even numbers seem to be a lot more searched for, go figure.

Sassy well done Mama Bear! he crossed the line and needed that finger slapping.

Hope tonight's dates are going well and looking forward to updates!

Matching underwear update: seen by more than just me tonight.

Things are getting pretty heavy, I think we've both seriously fallen for the other, but both trying to take things slow. We may be getting past the dating stage in some ways. Thankfully(?), work keeps us apart now until the weekend.

I have a massive grin on my face.

Wow, Happy for you Red!

Love your succinct but informative underwear update! I'm a bit hyper too. My thoughts need to slow down a bit before I can sleep.

Hi All!

I think the idea of not dating the thread go's back a ways the gist of it is simply don't date anyone who is posting on the thread obviously if you dated someone posting and you're predatory you're in a powerful position.

I think early on bant was the sole male posting like the group posting now they became friends and all met up I think some women would have liked to take it further hence the rule.

Sorry to butt in...

He texted you at this hour?! I think honesty, that you think he's lovely but don't see it going anywhere, is the best policy. Allows him to move on too.

Also he leaves it a long time between contacting u each time. Id have disconnected even if id really cared to begin with.

Nice to read updates - yay Red!

Tanya sorry you've had bad news, have a big hug from me.

I may have a lunch date with MrCS on Friday but I'm not holding my breath. If he wasn't so hot I'd have told him to get lost ages ago

Date number 2 with Teach on Saturday. Like others I'm scared as I can see myself really liking him. I postponed a date with MrIT so I could see Teach again as I really feel with the limited free time I have, he's who I want to spend it with. I'll see how the weekend goes & try and gauge how he feels about this.

NiceTits has popped up again but having put him off once and since told him nothing has changed I'm kind of at a loss what else to tell him.

Swinger usually messages me once a day to say hello but it's not really gone further than that.

J1 still wants to take me out but it kind of depends on this weekend.

Princess is an added complication-we matched on Tinder & got chatting, then he just kept demanding dirty pics...I should have blocked him then & there but didn't Now he's given up asking for pics and wants to talk to me. Even though we've never met or spoken on the phone, if I mention my ex he says things like 'well I'm the new guy now'. I just think now it's really rude to just block but I can't think what to say.

Stripper seems to have disappeared off the planet, but I did find out he does do the full monty (I may have mentioned this previously).

Phew, I think that's about it for now.

Morning!!! Playing thread catch up

314 the annoying thing about your friend that you argued with is that I'm not even surprised by his comment. The double standards some men adhere to is mind boggling. Unfortunately there are no shortage of men who think like this. Their immediate assumption is to think 'she does this all the time' and form a negative judgement off the back of it. Zero view is given on the fact that they are also do...go figure!
Yay re H, so you officially off all dating apps?

born I am only on Happn and that keeps me fairly busy.

waving I'm with the others re whatsapp. Less that 5% of my time on there is dating related. Lol at the etc.
Re writer, I'd either ignore. Or say you're slammed at the moment. Or say you don't feel the spark and wish him the best.
Keep us updated re soho!

choccy I'd arrange something, what have you got to lose?

prizey thanks for that link to the ted talk, will be watching tonight!

Welcome to the thread golden. I'd go for a drink/ coffee with him and use the I'm not ready for anything. I actually need to be alone can we be friends yada yada...or something along those lines.

goldfish and supper glad you clarified that. I thought the same as others. Don't spend all your time on here, but that makes sense.

tanya feel better and sorry for your sad news. Hope all ok xx

coal welcome. Nope, nothing is predetermined as your 'lot'. Find yourself a lovely 40 year old!

handy how did you leave the date? What's next?? Sounds intriguing....

jolly happy happy birthday! Have a mojito for us all!!! Do link the article.

red what a fabulous Loo update! Yay!

gast yay re teach!!! Am also glad you didn't cancel the date with MrCS.

Phew, that was a long post.
I think I have an impromptu coffee/ quick lunch with a new contender today. Have to decide whether to meet him and find out more f2f or message interrogate - a little more today.

Have fab days all. It's freezing out...so envious thinking about jolly somewhere nice and warm.

Date for tonight confirmed! First one since I joined the thread... If it goes wrong, I'm blaming you lot 😆 haha. Just a coffee.

Wohoo for the good dates last night!

Welcome coal!

Waving have you replied? I can't think what to say. Something about there being no spark??

Oops, I missed tanya's response. It's a bit gutsy, but a great one.

Mr talkative. He promises he's more so in RL. I bloody hope so!
First date, I'm thinking this outfit

Eloquent that looks lovely!

Red sounds very exciting for you!

Replied to the 2 "not my usuals" but no messages back yet. Mr army has now asked for more pictures but I don't have any!! The few on my profile were the best I could muster up as I hate having my photo taken. Help! What do I do??