Step inside the dating thread, 95

[MissPiggySeeksFrogwithGSOH]

We don't have get through these at speed....

The Rules

1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
2. Develop a thick skin
3. Do no invest emotionally too soon
4. It's all BS until it actually happens
5. Trust your gut instinct
6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you
8. If it's not fun- stop
9. Loo update is mandatory

10. No dating the thread 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches, and take from it what you will

314 you can self refer if you feel you would benefit from counselling. Go to the Mind.org website or call them 03001233393
Or Google 'IAPT'

Yes, where is Red?

Is it sad that I'm still grinning like the Cheshire Cat?

waving I lived in London for 13 years I don't any more. SO I'm not judging myself too harshly for having got to this age without driving but now the time has come.

Yes, where's RED?!

Thanks Prizey. I'll have a look at the site.

Waving no I have not come around texting Popcorn yet. I need a little more time and to get back in the game first. I am also thinking that "seeing each other next in February" (because I was really busy) was a running joke between us so I will wait till then to see if he takes the opportunity to chase me down. Because I am a freaking prize.

Next week is Make-Or-Break Week for IKEA. If he does not text comes Sunday, he is out, I am definitely blocking him. Too bad we were a 99% match! I am guessing the missing 1% covers the fact he is not that into me.

I am talking with three new guys who seem pretty cool, so we will see what happens. And I matched with my "dream profile" read folk musician earlier today so I am hoping he messages.

Cheshire Gast look at you haha - great date is all that matters!

My (single) friends were all raging about Valentine's Day today and somehow all agreed that men would be running around in the next week or so to land someone before the day... I might have read too many self help books lately - but I really think most men will be lurking around for an easy shag.. What do y'all think? Get out there with a green ribbon on? Or hide away until the madness dies? Or just go for the easy shag?

Ooh, where to start..

Welcome knackeredknitter re the advice on here, I agree as its been invaluable to me!

314 your daughter sound fabulous! As for the driving, if it's what you want then go for it. I only learnt to do so 9 years ago (49 now) and I couldn't be without, as it does give you a certain amount of freedom (although I do actually need it for my job now). As for therapy, I have spent £££ on it because of my ex (total head fuckery) and the best one I saw, basically said "listen to your gut, as that's what's brought you here". Must add that like waving I was a bit of a saver/carer type of personality, so I do have to watch out for that, but being aware of it has made draw back on more than one occasion.

Waving my mum (dad is dead) couldn't be further from what you describe! When I call her, she asks "how's your love life" . Which in some ways is lovely, but I'm not sure I want that conversation with my mum .

Re the valentines stuff, I actually agree with Soho Waving and had the exact convo with Mr Diamond on Friday, when he presented me with the Rose. He said "I don't do your typical shows of affection, but rather do them when I feel it". Fine by me, as so long as a guy shows you signs of affection at random times, then that for me says a lot more than all the commercial crap that some but in to! .

lacoba She can argue about nothing, she's not all Saint! But earlier, she did know it was important to throw me a bone of support! But yeh, at the moment I only have a local part-time job and there are other opportunities out there. Plus, in my personal life driving will give me more independence. I felt really infantalised by my parents today. And my brother. He jumped on board too.

I think it's common for carer types to end up in abusive relationships. Especially if as in my case they're used to a dynamic at home of approval being at the end of a carrot. I read my esfj personality profile the other day and I thought, wow, it's like an explanation of why what happened to me happened. I'm much stronger now. Awareness helps a lot.

I just did sw6p level and the last circuit of 30 ds level 2. I didn't give it my full might though. Tomorrow night.

As for Valentines day, I kind of hate it. I want somebody to be nice to me EVERY DAY

314 I know, my lads the same and he's 26! But it still feels 'warm' when they acknowledge you as another human being, as opposed to 'just mum'.

My job involves a caring role of sorts, but I am grateful to them (charity based) that they acknowledge the problems with this & we have to check in regularly, so this is a bit of informal counselling- I think?

I agree that I too hate V/day. If you're with someone, then there's a pressure to do something, if you're not, then you feel like one of societies waives and strays .

Shuffles in to thread bashfully

Hi everyone. Last night was very, very good. And this morning. And the rest of the day's been rather pleasing too.

Hey everyone

gast am sooo happy for you! How lovely that you're still on a post date high. Long may it continue.

red shall no doubt emerge tmrw after a 2 day date!

waving how is soho doing? He sounds like he's having an utterly shit time.
I'm still feeling meh. Think everything is just catching up with me. I'll bounce back, I always do.

jolly what's the latest with IKEA? I've lost track.

Welcome to the thread knackered, the advice and support on here is brill!

Valentine's Day?? . HATED it with a passion when I was younger. Am more ambivalent about it now. As things stand schools break up that week and I have half term booked off so am on the cusp of booking a getaway for the DC's and I. Am so not doing anything with anyone on that date.

Right so a new week looms. Date roll call please!

I'm seeing mrfrench for lunch tmrw. scot is also warming up for round 2. mrimpromptu and I need to set a coffee up this week. All have been in touch over the weekend. Still. Meh.

Yay red!!!!!!!! x post.

So. Was it worth the wait and are you glad you didn't wear grey underwear!!!!!

Ha!

Evening all! Just catching up..has anyone head from Red yet? Hope she's OK.

314 Go for it with the car! I kind of have the opposite problem. I don't have a car and don't really drive though I have my license. My mum nagged me into refresher lessons earlier in the year and keeps on at me to borrow her car. I really have to do it and get my confidence back! Anyway, cooking for H sounds like a good idea. I used to cook for my ex (not DS's dad, the guy I was seeing last year...really need to come up with a nickname for him) a fair amount, meant that we could see each other without me needing a babysitter

waving You sound very switched on re Soho. I think it would be very easy to get sucked into the carer role but you know that. Well done for standing firm with your ex too...you have a backbone of steel!

gast Are you still grinning? It's not sad at all, it's lovely, just how you should be feeling after a great date. I wouldn't worry about the sex thing. I've had a similar experience and it did work out once we got to know each other a bit better.

jolly hope things work out with your new prospects!

knackered why is the muso unsuitable?

I instigated a chat with Birdman earlier. He was very sweet, asking about my weekend and saying nice things. I gave him the perfect opening to suggest a second date....and....nada...zlitch. Is this normal!? He seemed keen, he suggested another date, I let him know I am interested but he's not doing anything about it. I'm free on Friday...should I drop that into conversation somehow? Or just bloody ask him out!

Anyway, was feeling a bit frustrated after that so messaged ex and he mentioned seeing friends last night so I know he wasn't out on a date. So that's made me happy at least!

Had a couple of messages on POF and a "crush" on Happn. None of them look very promising but none are awful so I think I'll reply to all and see what happens.

In the meantime, I've just discovered that the 9 seasons of X Files are on Amazon Prime so that'll keep me busy for a bit

Red! Feliz regreso! We nearly sent out a search party! Glad it was good!

And Gast, you too, sounds like you had a great night.

I'm dating the thread I think

Give me time. I'll know which end is up, soon.

haha! Nice one Red!

I am absolutely smitten. He said he is too.

Delighted for you Red and Gast
Sassy hope this week is better
Tanya and Eloquent thinking of you
Everyone else,happy dating

Ok, just had a text from Teach saying 'sorry, can we just be friends, I've enjoyed our dates though' Not quite sure where that came from but meh life goes on right?

Music to one's ears red. Delighted for you

Sassy, are you feeling like it will happen? Some days I feel like that. That it's just a matter of putting in the time. Like any other project. But other days I feel I'm too old, who'd want me, nobody seems to have so far..... boo hoo. Anyway, three dates lined up!? that's good going! That's six week's worth of men for me. (only because the supply is poor :-p)

gast WTAF?! What a tool though, to say that by text the day after you had sex....is it too early to say that you are well rid?

Clutching at straws but are you sure he meant to text you? Did he have other irons that he had to let down?

I'm pretty sure it was meant for me. I've just replied 'didn't see that coming, hope you find what you're looking for'. Now holed up in the bathroom having a little sob but I'll be ok.

Plenty more fish eh?

gast - I think you may have dodged a bullet, what a spineless dick to do that by text, after the dates you've had. Onwards and upwards...plenty more where he came from. What an idiot he is, certainly doesn't deserve you or your tears.

Oh Gast,I'm sorry,that's exactly what I've had twice... Best you find out now rather Than later,still hurts though!