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Original poster

Step inside, it's the Dating Thread 94

999 replies

tanyadm · 08/01/2016 22:57

We don't have get through these at speed....

The Rules

  1. The first rule about the dating thread is you don't talk about it with people you're dating.
  2. Develop a thick skin
  3. Do no invest emotionally too soon
  4. It's all BS until it actually happens
  5. Trust your gut instinct
  6. People vanishing, lying & being generally weird is not your fault
  7. You are the prize - they should be trying to impress you
  8. If it's not fun- stop
  9. Loo update is mandatory
10. No dating the thread 11. Read Why Men Love Bitches.
OP posts:
Thread gallery
5
PrizeyPrize · 13/01/2016 12:00

No tanya...just no Shock

HandyWoman · 13/01/2016 12:49

Speed awareness courses - group activities - plenty of flirting opportunities! Smile why not!!!

PrizeyPrize · 13/01/2016 12:59

I'm here and sadly no potentials. Feel like a naughty teenager on detention. Like Breakfast Club but without the hotties. 4 and a half hours of sheer boredom. May even loo update just to break the monotony Sad

Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 13:00

Ah, shame!

OP posts:
TooSassy · 13/01/2016 14:58

My date was very very very good.

Not sure on chemistry yet. He is an absolute alpha male so am going to reserve judgement on how 'date able' he is as a result of that. First impressions are he is very funny, self depreciating, up front and highly intelligent. We got on brilliantly.

Date 2 is a definite yes from the both of us and logistically given we work 5 mins apart it makes it so easy!

He is mrfrench. Grin

Currently firming up a few other dates with other irons however.

Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 15:02

Hooray, so pleased for you! Alpha is ok if it is balanced by self deprecating? Therefore not a cockybollocks?

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RedMapleLeaf · 13/01/2016 15:13

Ooh sounds promising Sassy!

SquareRootOf314 · 13/01/2016 15:46

Great news toosassy Wine

whatsforsupper · 13/01/2016 16:07

Hooray, so pleased for you! Alpha is ok if it is balanced by self deprecating? Therefore not a cockybollocks

That's v v funny tanya

choccyfiend78 · 13/01/2016 16:21

That's great news sassy!!

Think I have terrified the kick boxer, read the message back that I sent yesterday and it makes me sound like a right stalker Shock he has visited my profile but not replied so I think he must not realise that I have actually seen him just not spoken Grin

HandyWoman · 13/01/2016 16:27

Sassy Wine Cake great news!!!! Yey!!!

TooSassy · 13/01/2016 17:29

Lol tanya that's what I'm hoping! If he'd been a straight alpha male without that aspect he wouldn't have made it to date 2!

Re Bee just wait it out now. Ball is in his court and your text was spot on. Second guessing why he's not setting a date will drive you crazy. Sorry though, it's rubbish.

handy how's the 'best' friend situation panning out?

Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:33

I've now got Northerner texting me about his date tonight and how he thinks it might not work out because they left such a long gap. ARGH!

OP posts:
Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:36

(And that was after him texting me while I was still on date with Bee to ask how date was!) What is wrong with these people?!

OP posts:
SquareRootOf314 · 13/01/2016 17:37

tanyadm next time you're with Bee, say to him, look, I'm not a passive person so if I want to suggest a date I will. That way he'll either know that he can't do all the choosing while you do all the waiting. tell him that sitting around doesn't work for you. It'll either make him prioritise you or back off. I think the latter judging by how well you got on.

Tonight I'm going to do 30ds level two and then look over some more tricky interview questions. Tomorrow is going to be a high adrenaline day. Actually, looking forward to the date, that will be nice and relaxing. It's the leaving work for the interview, and the getting home, quick turn around back out the door... I'm going to feel a bit tightly wound tomorrow until the first glass of wine soothes me.

Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:42

Oh he knows I am not passive! We had some awesome discussions about politics and class and feminism and families and....,loads of stuff. So he knows I am quite.....forthright! If we get to second date, because of the level of honesty/soul-baring in date 1, then we would be able to have a fairly frank chat about the friends/more than friends scenario.

OP posts:
Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:42

Good luck for interview!

OP posts:
SquareRootOf314 · 13/01/2016 17:42

I meant the former!!!

Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:44

Lol, didn't clock that!

OP posts:
Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:46

If I could have got childcare for Saturday, could have suggested he meet me after work at my friend's party. Friend has made it earlier so I can come along with girls for at least a chunk... Ex-H is out unfortunately.

OP posts:
Shameandregret · 13/01/2016 17:47

Hey all I'm new here and have been OLD for 5-6 weeks. I've had one disastrous date. About 6 dates with musician guy and last night went on another with someone I was completely attracted too. He seemed to like me back and has texted a lot today. I guess what I want to know is what's the etiquette?

I actually feel quite guilty on musician guy but we have never had a we are exclusive conversation. Most he's said is I'm enjoying this and I want to see what happens. I really really fancy the guy from last night but think it will just be hook ups for a while.

So do I keep seeing both? Is this normal? I've been single for 18 months, left a very violent decade long marriage. I'm 36. Have dc's.

Original poster
tanyadm · 13/01/2016 17:50

I would say there is no point throwing away musician guy until you know what is going to happen with the new one. Though I suspect that is what is being done to me...

OP posts:
RedMapleLeaf · 13/01/2016 17:52

What would you rather do SaR (can't call you by your nickname!)?

Personally, I like MrFoaf, and although it's early days I don't want to date anyone else, and he doesn't need to know that yet.

SquareRootOf314 · 13/01/2016 18:00

Yes, tanyadm, I think sometimes it wouldn't be appropriate but when you have really talked, as intelligent equals, it's torture to have to sit around and wait for the man to get in touch. And I think intelligent men who want an equal get that. There's a difference between pushing water uphill and saying, look we talked like equals for three hours, so I'm not going to take on the role of waity tanya here. I'm just going to look at my week, see I'm free thursday, suggest it to you.

I know that approach wouldn't have worked with that dreadful pilot that I went out with a while back. But I think the sort of man I want to be in a relationship with wouldn't be turned off by it.

Or am I deluding myself. Is that just delivering the moose burger? In a sesame seed bun with a salad on the side. Confused

Shameandregret · 13/01/2016 18:02

I dint want to throw away either to be honest. I've met the extremely good looking one once and know what I'm like in lust Blush but I don't know dating is about. I used to just go out, get drunk and it was either a ONS or a boyfriend situation got sorted pretty quick.

Musician guy just rang me (he's away filming at the moment) and asked if I'd got off with someone last night cos he had a feeling in his guts?! But then said he didn't care if I had or I hadn't? I just told him to shut up (that's how we operate, jovially insulting to each other ha!) Why is it so complex?