i don't know if i can talk about it here?

[panele01]

hello everyone,
i am new here and i don't know,i am not sure if i can talk about it here? i am 20 weeks and 4 days pregnant
,but i am having problems in my life right now,difficulties,complications

Ok,i understand Noeuf,I speak to you,Goodnight Noeuf,sweet dreams,good luck,take care,bye

It did indeed look as if it would be a simple one to tick off the list, Noeuf, but from the additional information I suspect the dm completed the previous return(s) and I wonder how she's going to present panele's earnings for this tax year when mention of a P60 suggests that tax and NI contributions were deducted at source.

goddessofsmallthings,i really want to leave this for tomorrow or another day soon thank you very much,Goodnight goddessofsmallthings,sweet dreams,good luck,take care,bye

Have you seen a midwife yet? Your GP should have referred you for antenatal care.

Hello MetallicBeige,no i haven't,last time when i spoke to my GP,she said she will get one for me,i will be in touch with my GP again really soon and find out about the midwife

I am serious MetallicBeige

OP, your first post on this thread was on New Year's Eve and you were 20 weeks and 4 days pregnant.

It's a very serious matter that your GP is still failing to refer you to a hospital and you need to access midwifery care as soon as possible. If this is really what's happening then she has failed in her duty of care. Not to mention being in blatant disregard of many different guidelines and procedures.

You need to be reporting this GP at once, not relying on her as your only source of support.

At the booking in appointment conducted by the midwife that is offered as standard to every pregnant woman throughout the UK, they take down vital medical and social history, do tests to check for risk factors and special measures they might need to take to protect yours and the babies health, and they also go through the process and choices that you'll need to make throughout the entire pregnancy, from ultrasound scans, nuchal tests to birth plans, gestational diabetes, babies growth and development etc etc etc.

It is possible to refuse all healthcare but very unusual, and it wouldn't be something health care professions would be happy for you to do, especially as it seems like you don't understand the system or what's on offer as routine to look after you and your unborn child. This isn't something GPs or the wider NHS takes lightly and it's not something a GP would gamble their job over.

I'm sorry to sound harsh OP but you appear to be sleep-walking into some kind of complete disaster, which isn't usual and I find it so confusing about how you are managing to avoid every source of help available that anyone else in your position would be able to access without going out of their way at all, just being swept along in the usual process would get you in front of people that can help you. Or maybe there is something else going on here that you need a lot of help with and I really hope you get it.

Misc is absolutely right.
Your GP must refer you to the midwifery team, it's very odd that you've seen your GP a few times and nothing has happened. Phone Drs reception Monday and ask what's happening. It should have happened within days of Dr being aware you're pregnant.
Something's very amiss here - have the Drs got right contact details for you? Check they have right number when you call. Could your post go astray? **
You are putting yourself and baby at serious risk if you don't take control and take action.
Can I ask how old you are? (You didn't have to answer!)

MiscellaneousAssortment,i want to tell you it is my fault,why i didn't get the midwife before,ok,so the thing is,after when i found out that i was pregnant,i informed my GP about my pregnancy and i wasn't sure if i wanted to continue with the pregnancy or not,it took me a long time to decide what to do next,i was traumatised after sexual assault and i am back at my mother's and i still am,it was so hard for me to make my decision,the GP couldn't get me a midwife then if i wasn't sure if i want to continue with my pregnancy or not,i was falling into a deep stress state that time when i came back to my mother's,this is not an excuse,this is really serious

MiscellaneousAssortment and BlackDoglet,please read my post dears So is it really GP's fault? When it could be my fault too?

Panele
Every single time you are told something constructive there's suddenly an excuse.
I really think you need to actually do something other than sleep in, get stressed about your mother and worry about the future.

You have stated a lot of issues and each of those has been given a suggested action. If your mental health is such that you cannot do anything practical you must tell your GP.

Noeuf,yes,i know

panele01 is feeling really down again,people are trying to help her and she is not doing anything to help herself and her baby

Correction: her

With all respect panele, you need to stop over thinking and start 'actioning'. Please do this for your own sake.

Wishing you all the best, we just all want to help you.

I know Melvali,i know Thank you very much

What do you want from this thread Panele?

So you want practical advice and support? So you can do what you say you want to do (leave your mothers house etc)? Or just comfort, kind words to make you feel better, in whatever situation you choose to live in?

I think you want the second. Which is why you keep clinging to people giving support, which comes with advice, then getting upset when those people can't understand why you don't take any of the advice offered, yet still say you do to keep the comfort flowing.

Nothing wrong with not wanting to change your situation if you don't want to, or are too locked into a way of living that you don't want to or can't change anything yet... but you will tend to get people confused and feeling like they aren't being listened to - which is your perogative, there's no obligation to act on anything written here, and maybe us posters should remember that!

(Btw, I did read a your posts OP, I've read all of them and posted several times before, no need to ask me to).

MiscellaneousAssortment,some of the moments i don't know anymore what i but some of the moments,i feel really badly and i want to get out of this stress state,get a professional help,do something for me and my baby,but this is a feeling not an action

Correction: i don't know anymore what i want

You sound very depressed. It's not surprising. It is very hard to think straight when you have depression

Take tomorrow to be kind to yourself. Sleep. Go for a walk!

On Monday you can make some phone calls. We'll help you organise yourself, if you want.

It is my fault that i didn't start acting weeks ago and let myself into a deep stress state,i should've love myself and not let this happen to me,the time is running and i am not doing anything and i haven't done anything,i could've done many things weeks ago,but nooooo i let myself drown into a deeper stress state and allowed myself to become weaker,now i am sitting and blaming myself,when i should stand up and tell to myself thats it,it is time to act for real!

Don't worry about anything now. Why don't you write down what you want to work on, if anything, then put it to one side and have a bath, cup of tea, maybe read a book and get to bed early. Put your phone away and try and relax. There is nothing you can do right now ( Saturday night at 9pm) so just focus on getting a good night sleep. That alone will help.

We will hold your hand along the way

I am surprised i haven't started hurting myself and not wanting to live anymore,hating myself ect,i have to tell you,after sexual assault,while i was at my mother's,i've ended up few times going to my GP,because i didn't see no hope in my life anymore and i wanted to die,i have cried a lot,much later,i even ended up in the hospital,they kept me there for one night and then discharged me the next day,i was kept in Observation Ward that one night