Brave Babes - Wrapping up for a Wonderful Winter

[venusandmars]

Hi, I am venusandmars and I've been on these threads for many years.

It can be tough at this time of year when the adverts are full of families cheerfully opening bottles of wine and good cheer, when work parties are alcohol fuelled, when distant friends call round with a bottle in hand.

Maybe you're trying to cut down a little in the pre-Christmas weeks, maybe you are struggling to know how to continue with a longer period of abstinence, maybe you are waking up after a Christmas Party feeling sick and covered in shame (or even feeling shame and covered in sick).

Whatever, whenever, if you want to stop, or cut down, or simply share your struggle with others who also feel the tug..... please join us.

Usually our lovely mouseface opens these threads, but the poor mouse is sick in hospital and so I am overcoming the technophobia that a 50-something feels.... (well done me ). Our last thread is here if you want to read the last few posts

And if you want to read the story from the beginning (you'll need a few weeks) HERE is where it all started when Jesuswhatnext posted in May 2010.

Welcome one and all x

You might find your sleep not so good for the first 5-10 days as your body really sees the hangover through to end. After that you should get great sleep.

Don't worry about tomorrow, just concentrate on getting through today. Make sure you have other lovely drinks available. Hot chocolate, soda water or whatever you fancy. Also allow yourself sweet treats and try to eat before you get hungry.

Common triggers are hunger, anger, lonliness and tiredness (HALT) so look out for those and be ready.

It's like preparing for battle isn't it

Check in with us if you feel tempted at all or just want a chat

Challenge averted, I was going to have to go to Tesco yesterday to pick up a few little bits and knew it'd be challenging , but a friends going anyway so has offered to pick me up the few bits I wanted, so I won't be tempted to get any drink

Thanks for thinking of me Pop, I'm determined to stay off the booze today. We've just arrived and I'm in the loo sorting out my face as I cried the whole way here listening to the Terry Wogan tributes. So so sad.

I've already been offered a beer but DH has told everyone I'm doing DJ and I'm staying out of the kitchen. Deep breaths...

Good luck to you too Claret, you can do it!

You can do it Margie and well done made.
Not feeling great here. Should really go and visit dad but I just can't face it. So cowardly and pathetic but am drained and weary.

Keep going margie, soon enough the feeling will pass and you won't want a drink. I'm through the other side, stuffed full no room for a glass of wine - off to get me some terribly sweet bad for me pudding to stave off the craving once and for all!

Well done Claret, I've done the same as you, stuffed myself with paella & cake and now got no room for anything else! Crisis averted.

Ma my love, sorry to hear you so down, wish I could do more than just write words on a screen. Big hugs love.

Thanks Margie the name checks are enough and kind of you. Just trying to deal with some stuff, as well as the physical problems of the constant urine infections

I hope you feel better soon, Ma get plenty rest and watch a film and just chill.

I've managed to avoid drinking so far, I feel like shit though - a headache, feeling sick, not having much energy and my hands are shaking, I haven't actually been sick but keep thinking I'm going to. I want to stop the shit feeling, but know I can't have any alcohol. I'm currently huddled in bed with a bottle of diet coke, crackers and sister act 2 on my laptop, hopefully I'll feel better soon.

I made roast chicken , said no to tasting someone's wedding fizz ( arghhhhh) and have spent the afternoon clearing out the lift in between eating 57 leftover toast potatoes. Desp want booze but not going to cave.

Lifts= loft

Well done margie!

Hope you feel better soon ma. Sounds like you're having a tough time of it

I'm skulking off now to wallow in my gluttony seek out more food

Hope you are managing to get some rest ma, that's probably what you really need.

made have you got any cereal, you might benefit from some vitamin B and cereal often has it added. I'm not sure if diet coke and crackers will be enough to sustain you as you really do need some sugar too. Keep going, today will soon be over.

Well done Margie and Claret

Have just made and ate some pasta, cheese and ketchup which is good still feeling rubbish and talks about graduation and plans for after graduation have left me craving booze to relieve stress

You will get those moments made but you have to find another way to cope. Do you run or play any sport?

Hello, just checking in. Welcome to Made - you are in the right place and you sound like you are really determined. It is such a hard environment, uni halls, alcohol-wise - I remember it all too well, and I am so impressed with your determination (but remember - one day at a time). Honestly, I think so many people's issues with alcohol start at university/college - mine certainly did - and you are so brave and wise to try to address it now. Good luck to you.

Ma - love to you. Faire - this footner thing, feeling a bit conned, its been five days and nothing has happened. At all. Where are my baby soft feet? When did yours start peeling (yuck, sorry)?

Feeling truly awful, but at least it is my own doing. Which sounds like I have a hangover - I don't, but I feel 10 times worse than if I did. I decided after a month AF, I would try to address the rest of my rubbish diet so am doing a 21 day detox, starting yesterday. Oh my goodness - I had forgotten - caffeine withdrawal: pure, pure evil. Yesterday/this morning literally could not walk, talk, stand - head pounding. Terrifying, the potency of that stuff - compounded by not having any sugar, either. My poor body is in meltdown. Physically the withdrawal for me is way worse than alcohol - but at least with caffeine it is basically a physical trigger, once it is out of your system it is relatively easy to forget about it. There isn't - for me, anyway, a Caffeine Wizard in the same way as there is a WW. Anyway, at least I feel too awful even to think about alcohol, so that's something.

Right, too dizzy to type more, so hugs to all babes and I am off to lie down. Again.

Sorry to keep dominating this thread, you lot must be getting sick of me It's re-freshers this week and I'm going out three times (headphone disco, german night and paint party). Obviously, it's going to be hard not to drink and I do want to go to those events, and have maybe one or two drinks but not get hammered. I was thinking of not drinking at all before going out (I won't be tempted by any alcohol I buy), and only taking a fiver out with me so I can only buy one or two. Does this sound like a good plan, or like I'm making excuses to drink? I know it's not ideal to go out and put myself in temptations way so soon, but I really don't want to miss out on the events and feel in a way, that I need to drink to have fun. I must sound really pathetic babbling on like this, I'm really unsure of what to do. I want to go out and have fun but I don't want to fail before I've even started. Something's telling me to go out after work tomorrow and get some drink for predrinks but I know that's a bad idea, I won't be able to buy only one bottle, and I really doubt I'll be able to keep it until I go out. I suppose I could try and have a alcohol free night out (some of my friendship group don't drink) but I think that I'll just be setting myself up for failure that way because I know I'll want booze once I'm out, like I said though, I don't want to miss out.

Right. I've decided to pull myself together and stop being ridiculous. I am not going to buy any alcohol tomorrow. When I go out, I am only taking 5 pounds cash, no credit cards so I can only buy 1 drink. I'm not going to let my lack of self control ruin my last year of uni and what could be a fun night with friends. And I haven't gone through 2 days of feeling like crap and going through hell just to ruin it all with a stupid bottle of wine.

Quick one - you sound determined made. We are with you.

made keep it up, you sound like you've got a good plan.

All dry Januaryers WELL DONE!!! Now for me I have to remember why I did it in the first place and not dive head first back into all the bad habits from last year...and the year before that....and the year before that...

I'm dry at the very least until Friday - will cross that bridge then. ODAAT

Morning all

made post as much as you like, this is what the thread is here for.

It's usually a good idea to make decisions about drinking in the morning, so last night I would have said sleep on it.

Now a fresh new day is here and all you need to do is decide whether or not to drink. To be honest, it may be that how much you drink is out of your control, all you can choose is whether or not to have that first one.

Well done Claret, what an achievement. Now that you've done it you know you can have a dry month whenever you want to

Morning all.

Sorry to be MIA over such a busy weekend, but I've been asleep, mostly. I think I have been over estimating my sober energy levels, and it caught up with me!

Welcome Made, being sober at Uni is SO difficult, but it is becoming more acceptable. Try making your first drink on nights out a big lime and soda (visualise ordering it) this has several advantages: it's super cheap; it will quench your thirst and fill you up; by the time you have finished it, everyone else will be at least two drinks ahead of you and won't notice that you are dancing in silence, sober!!

Your university will have at least one counsellor who specialises in substance abuse, and there will be nothing they haven't heard, you can't shock them. It might be good anyway to get some therapy, since you are doing an emotionally draining degree as well as volunteering. If you speak to a tutor, they will I hope, be sympathetic and supportive (I would be, I am a lecturer), but they will refer you to the experts in Student Services.

Anyway, SweetDog is being suspiciously quiet, must go and check on him. Happy Sober Feb everyone.

Thanks faire

Pop, well done for not caving in, jealous of the roast potatoes!

Claret, well done on DJ, I'm with you on not turning Feb into Wet February! I have a night out on Friday and a birthday party on Saturday but I'll cross that will I/won't I bridge when I come to it.

Made, you're doing great, post as much as you need to, we're all here to help and support each other. Faire and Sweet have offered some really good advice which I would definitely second.

Fox, hope you're feeling better?

And lovely Ma how are you today? I hope this week will be better for you, sending lots of positive vibes your way.

Small I meant to say to you earlier that the same thing happened to me. I thought it was rubbish and wasn't going to work and then all of a sudden it did. I think it was day four or five but can't remember.