No. I did not find out he was cheating and then say "but she is unnattractive and overweight".
No.
I was unsure if he was cheating or not, I had a mild paranoia about him being with a female friend and the fact that she was making posts to show them together, and I was assessing the likelyhood that it was platonic or not.
In assessing that likelyhood her sexual attractiveness was obviously a factor. One of many, but a factor.
whether certain people care to admit it or not, the physical aspect is a mssive part of sexual attraction. In short-term, one-off sexual escapades it's actually the primary factor. There is no long build up here or time together.
Wikepedia Says:
A person's physical appearance has a critical impact on their sexual attractiveness. This involves the impact one's appearance has on the senses, especially in the beginning of a relationship
It also says men have a preference for younger and more beautiful women. We know this. This is part of society and the world we live in.
Therefore someone's age and looks is massively relevant when assessing the odds that your boyfriend has a relationship with them that is less than platonic.
Doesn't mean it can't happen, but most certainly means it's less likely.
The people on this thread know little about me, but from the age of 11 to the age of 22 I was massively overweight. A size 22 actually.
I can tell you without hesitation that the number of men who were sexually attracted to me was more than a hundred times greater when I went down to a size 10 and starte wearing makeup and dressing a certain way.
This woman simply did not look like someone you would be cheating with. She looked tomboyish. She looked outside of the body type he historically has dated. She was a diferrent age. She seemed to have personal circumstances that seemed to make having an affair partner stay in her home unlikely. All of that was relevant.
Incidentally, I also have no idea if he is shagging her.
He could very well have told me he was going anywhere and not posted anything online or made it so I could not see. He could have hidden her existence from me had he wished.
She might well be just a friend, who has posted photos of him. She might fancy him, she might not. He might be texting her late at night, or he might be texting someone else.
I've actually not a clue.
All I know for sure is that he came home a day late from holiday and cancelled a date with me to do that.
He stayed with a woman on holiday.
She has posted a photo of them together and been vague about whether or not it's romantic.
It's suspicious, but nothing is certain and it's very difficult for me to know the truth. It would have been nice if people could have focussed on helping me figure out the truth, or know how to proceed instead of focussing on trying to pretend that the way she looks was irrelevant.