First post so please excuse me I'll try to be brief.
I've been talking to a man I met on Match for about 3 weeks.
He was nice and respectful with no dodgy messages so we started texting, again very nice with just general chit chat throughout the day.
He suggested meeting up for a coffee quite early on and I agreed but for various reasons I couldn't manage until this coming Saturday. However in the meantime he has decided that we have hit it off so well he wanted to take me to dinner. Lovely I think, finally a man who is willing to put some effort into a date!
He texted during the week which restaurant he has booked, confirmed time and asked if I wanted to be picked up, he was even thoughtful enough to say he understood if I wanted to be picked up somewhere neutral not outside my home. Asked me to put on my best dress as he was going to spoil me. All going well.
However last night we speak on the phone, very nice. He was telling me how his son had helped him pick out a smart outfit for his "hot" date on Saturday. Then when I text to say how nice it was to speak to him his replies got very sexual very quickly, followed by a cock pic!!
It was late so I told him I wasn't comfortable with sexting and I thought we should just say goodnight for now.
This morning I get a text apologising saying it was just his hormones getting carried away also he would prefer to cook a meal for me at his place instead of going out 
I replied I bet you would and, in light of his messages last night, I really wanted to confirm we were on the same page as far as what we hoped would happen between us and he agreed he wanted a relationship with romance and company not just sex.
He then suggested we go for a coffee instead on Saturday night.
Honestly I feel this is a downgrade!!
My thoughts are:
His mask has slipped, he says he wants a relationship but I somehow doubt that!
Coffee is lovely as a first date, but seeing as a restaurant was already booked I feel if I accept this downgrade I'm setting the bar low and saying it's ok to let me down.
This change of heart has come about as I've made it quite clear that sex was something that would only happen once I got to know him.
I've text him saying that disappointed doesn't even cover how I'm feeling just now and I had been so pleased at the effort he had been willing to put into our first date, and this had really set him apart from other men on Match and well now he was more or less saying I wasn't worthy of a proper date.
No reply as yet.
I'm going to say IF he replies just forget it - the whole date has been spoiled for me before we've even met!!
Correct or not? Am I over-reacting?
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Relationships
First Date - so many red flags??
Elliementalmydearwatson · 15/10/2015 10:49
Lucky escape OP. Cannot get my head around this cock pic thing (and I am not that old, but have been with DO since early 20s).
How can the senders think any sensible woman will find an unsolicited cock shot anything other than gross and possibly vaguely threatening
It reminds me of a toddler that just found his penis. He is so proud, he wants to show everyone (recalling my ds at the age of 3 pulling down his pants in a shoe store 
). "Bless his heart". It may be that some blokes never get past that stage...or they all are self obsessed sex addicts.
destiny I assume it was for his own usage- lol. Just have an image of him using it as an ornament for his mantelpiece 
.
Just to reassure people who are feeling put off OLD by the prospect of a never ending stream of cock shots, I have been on Guardian Soulmates, off and on, for 18 months, and have never been sent one.
I've had plenty of dates with perfectly pleasant men who weren't my type, made a couple of good friends, and had a wonderful relationship with someone which sadly just didn't work out.
I did once have someone try to start a bit of a sext conversation... Not my thing at all so I suggested I would send him a hot picture and sent him a pic of a hot water bottle cover I'd knitted. He got the message 
I don't think it's anything to do with me, or the site. I have just been lucky not to have had the misfortune to come into contact with a sex offender. Because that is absolutely what sending an unsolicited cock shot is.
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