First post so please excuse me I'll try to be brief.
I've been talking to a man I met on Match for about 3 weeks.
He was nice and respectful with no dodgy messages so we started texting, again very nice with just general chit chat throughout the day.
He suggested meeting up for a coffee quite early on and I agreed but for various reasons I couldn't manage until this coming Saturday. However in the meantime he has decided that we have hit it off so well he wanted to take me to dinner. Lovely I think, finally a man who is willing to put some effort into a date!
He texted during the week which restaurant he has booked, confirmed time and asked if I wanted to be picked up, he was even thoughtful enough to say he understood if I wanted to be picked up somewhere neutral not outside my home. Asked me to put on my best dress as he was going to spoil me. All going well.
However last night we speak on the phone, very nice. He was telling me how his son had helped him pick out a smart outfit for his "hot" date on Saturday. Then when I text to say how nice it was to speak to him his replies got very sexual very quickly, followed by a cock pic!!
It was late so I told him I wasn't comfortable with sexting and I thought we should just say goodnight for now.
This morning I get a text apologising saying it was just his hormones getting carried away also he would prefer to cook a meal for me at his place instead of going out 
I replied I bet you would and, in light of his messages last night, I really wanted to confirm we were on the same page as far as what we hoped would happen between us and he agreed he wanted a relationship with romance and company not just sex.
He then suggested we go for a coffee instead on Saturday night.
Honestly I feel this is a downgrade!!
My thoughts are:
His mask has slipped, he says he wants a relationship but I somehow doubt that!
Coffee is lovely as a first date, but seeing as a restaurant was already booked I feel if I accept this downgrade I'm setting the bar low and saying it's ok to let me down.
This change of heart has come about as I've made it quite clear that sex was something that would only happen once I got to know him.
I've text him saying that disappointed doesn't even cover how I'm feeling just now and I had been so pleased at the effort he had been willing to put into our first date, and this had really set him apart from other men on Match and well now he was more or less saying I wasn't worthy of a proper date.
No reply as yet.
I'm going to say IF he replies just forget it - the whole date has been spoiled for me before we've even met!!
Correct or not? Am I over-reacting?
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Relationships
First Date - so many red flags??
Elliementalmydearwatson · 15/10/2015 10:49
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I just signed up to PH as I was going to start a thread and ask them (great idea Skip).
I got this message:
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SunnyIsles "My first and only dick pic was sent in 2006"
it made me lol that you remember the year! 
It's hideously forever etched in my memory, lorelei !
I even remember the month - only because it was just before Christmas 
I imagine a more plausible explanation could come from Sir David Attenborough.
i was of course joking.
I do like your idea. At least we could asses their artistic ability.
I believe that was how Henry VIII got it on with Anne of Cleves - a tapestry of his mickey, in various action shots (jousting, feasting, 'chilling', etc). Alas, the artist employed to convey her return tits/fanjo snap interpreted 'full frontal' in a more traditional manner.
How different it could all have been. 
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I balked at "spoil you" too! "Nice guy image" is also a red flag. Read this! gawker.com/5969878/nice-guys-of-ok-cupid-are-not-really
Online dating is such a minefield and hard work but it's worth knowing who to avoid by the more subtle signs. This was not so much a red flag as a gigantic flashing beacon. Of course there are genuinely nice blokes out there, they're just harder to find in the sea of morons 
Good rule of thumb is that the undecent ones like to shout about their "good points" the loudest.
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