Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. A phone that grows with your child.

Meet the Other Phone.
A phone that grows with your child.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

Original poster

Men's height

268 replies

Jenna333 · 02/08/2015 22:43

I know this is a shallow question but having looked at some OLD profiles, I got wondering about mens height. I know ultimately it comes down to many factors but I was wondering how other women feel about shorter men e.g 5'4" ish?

OP posts:
wannaBe · 03/08/2015 06:41

Height is the one thing which I find attractive, although I wouldn't exclude someone on the basis of their height iyswim. But xh is 6ft3 and dp is 6ft2, and I am 5ft2 so I have been lucky. :)

I am VI so physical looks mean absolutely nothing to me. But it's naive to think that all physical exclusions are shallow, we all have our preferences. I know most men wouldn't want to date me because I am VI, this is life. I wouldn't date someone who was very overweight or a smoker.

ElkeDagMeisje · 03/08/2015 07:19

CatMilkMan I think it's pretty normal for women to be attracted to men who are taller than them, I'm 6ft7 and DP is 5ft3

Its normal for women to be attracted to whoever they are attracted to. I dated a man of 6 feet 6 once and found his height really irritating. Nice guy but he was just freakishly tall, just like someone who is freakishly short.

Saying that, I quite like shorter men. I wouldn't rule someone out based on height alone, but I'd far rather a short man than an ugly, fat or bald one!

ARV1981 · 03/08/2015 07:40

I used to say the guy had to be taller, but I have come to realise that compatibility on an emotional and intellectual level is much more important to me than physical attributes.

My dh is taller than me (only by a couple of inches), but is slightly overweight (another thing I used to say I'd never go for), blond (used to go for dark men), but we just click. I've known him since I was 17 and he was 18, but it took 12 years for us to get together! If he'd made a move on me when we first met (when we were still sooooo young) I'd have turned him down, based on physical attributes alone, we wouldn't have remained friends and ultimately we wouldn't be married now! I know he fancied me then as well, I knew it at the time and he's obviously told me!

So for me, height isn't a major problem.... but maybe I can afford to say that given that I have absolutely no intention of dating anyone else ever again Grin

DrMorbius · 03/08/2015 08:02

I wonder what response I would get if I wrote on here: -

I'm not attracted to overweight women.
I wouldnt date any woman above size 12

lljkk · 03/08/2015 08:07

I'm 5'8" and once fell hard for a guy who was 5'6". I guess that means I'm not too bothered.

Friend is 6'2" and she'd have a real shortage of partners if she ruled out everyone shorter than her.

rumred · 03/08/2015 08:13

It's sexism pure and simple. But I can see how hard it is to get over the conditioning we've all had from birth. So sad for people like pps son. Sad too for anyone who doesn't fit the sexist stereotypes we have grown up with.

lovethisheat · 03/08/2015 08:16

I'm 5'5 and started OLD after divorce 2 yrs ao. Definitely more attracted to taller men. Had a few dates with shorter guys and just didn't find them attracted….until I met current bf…. he's 5'6" and I was instantly attracted to him, and very much physically attracted to him. I quite like it that we are almost the same height. He likes it when I wear heels even though I'm then a couple of inches taller - I don't really mind that…

Purpleball · 03/08/2015 08:17

IME they all lie and say they are taller. I wouldn't date someone shorter than me but the number of shortarses that turned up on dates is quite astonishing!
Whatever height they say, knock 4 inches off OP

DrMorbius · 03/08/2015 08:21

IME they all lie and say they are slimmer. I wouldn't date someone fatter than me but the number of fat arses that turned up on dates is quite astonishing!
Whatever weight they say, add on a stone.

mrsdavidbowie · 03/08/2015 08:23

When you're a six foot woman you are very limited if you want someone taller!
Ex h was about 5 foot ten.
But new man is 5 foot 8.

He is gorgeous. I have no need of feeling " protected" .... And I wear heels.
Sophie and Jamie do all right.....

Men's height
Geekymeeky · 03/08/2015 08:24

Say several men came on here and say 'I am not attracted to women above size 10 although I think women above size 10 are nice people'. What do you think would happen?

All the men in my family are above 6ft. I am the shortest member of my family at 5' 6". My husband was s 5' 10". Son 6' 3". So I don't have a height chip on my shoulder. The just feel it is unfair and there is too much hypocrisy.

Trills · 03/08/2015 08:27

You are never obliged to be in a relationship with anyone.

There is no criterion so shallow that it is "not allowed" for you to turn someone down because of it.

Be kind to people you do choose to have a relationship with.

Be polite to the people you turn down.

TokenGinger · 03/08/2015 08:32

*I wonder what response I would get if I wrote on here: -

I'm not attracted to overweight women.
I wouldnt date any woman above size 12*

I'd say, good for you for knowing what you like. The same as if you came on here and said, "I don't like redheads." I'd say, "Ok, I'm not the one for you."

We all have preferences. It's wrong to shame somebody for that. For everybody who prefers a taller man, there'll be somebody who prefers a shorter man. For everybody go prefers a slimmer woman, there'll be a man who likes a thicker woman. My DP has said to me not to be silly when losing weight (I'm a size 12), he said he loves my thick and muscular body and it would be a shame to lose an athletic build over a "thin" one. However, many men would like a slimmer build.

It's down to personal preference. That's why no two human beings are the exact same - we all meet like different things. Just be true to yourself and go for the thing you like instead of trying to change somebody - eg a bigger woman and asking her to lose weight.

ElkeDagMeisje · 03/08/2015 08:39

rumred It's sexism pure and simple. But I can see how hard it is to get over the conditioning we've all had from birth. So sad for people like pps son. Sad too for anyone who doesn't fit the sexist stereotypes we have grown up with.

Of course personal preference to whom you are attracted to is not sexism! People are attracted to the average, to symmetry, and statistically, men are taller than women.

Its sexist to suggest that women should not be allowed physical preferences when selecting a partner, and men should.

Howcanitbe · 03/08/2015 08:44

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

SoupDragon · 03/08/2015 08:44

How on earth is it sexist?

MeeWhoo · 03/08/2015 08:45

I had a frien who was 6ft, her boyfrien at the time was between 2 and 3 inches shorter than her. Whenever anyone mentioned the height difference she would say: "it doesn't matter, we don't spend that much time standing up when we are together" Grin

defineme · 03/08/2015 08:53

I think I was about 12 when a boy first said I was too tall to go out with(reached full height of 5 10 at 12) and that was a feature of dating for me repeatedly through my 20s. Which is perhaps why it never bothered me how tall men were, never had a physical type either-dated short/tall, thin/fat, academics/athletes, the only feature they all had in common was being a
bit wild and having a good sense of humour, which describes my dh (5 11) perfectly. I think having a type is so reductive...leave your options open and you'll have much more fun.

TokenGinger · 03/08/2015 08:53

I couldn't give two shiny shites if a man came on here and said, "Rotund women are not my preference," "White woman are not my preference," "Short women are not my preference," "Women with northern accents are not my preference."

It doesn't make ME any less attractive. It just means I am not their type. Great. I'll not waste my time there and move on to somebody who finds me perfect for them.

And weight is not really comparable to height. Lose the weight if it bothers you, don't lose it if not. But it can be changed. Height can't. And if a short man really doesn't do it for somebody, why should they have to feel ashamed or shallow about that?

TheStoic · 03/08/2015 08:53

It's sexism pure and simple.

Sexism? I do not think that word means what you think it means.

defineme · 03/08/2015 08:56

My dm(5 ft 4) was told it wasn't a good idea to marry my father because he was 6ft 2 and she might die in childbirth with large babies..tbf my brother and i were enormous babies, but she had no problems thankfully.

mrsdavidbowie · 03/08/2015 08:56

Tall women get lots of personal comments and they can do nothing about it.
Yes I know I'm tall.
It seems acceptable by many to do this.

Joysmum · 03/08/2015 08:57

My husband wasn't my 'type' physically but he's my fit. I'm certainly no oil painting and my eating disorder and baggage doesn't make me anyone's 'type' either. A type is an ideal.

Stick to type and you miss out on some wonderful people.

Northumberlandlass · 03/08/2015 09:02

Agree MrsDavidBowie - i had a message on OLD which said "Your tall"
I would never respond because

  1. poor grammar
  2. Confused yes, I'm tall ! Would you send a message saying "You're bald/ overweight / short It drives me nuts
ShortandSweeter · 03/08/2015 09:11

I guess some folks have a type; some women don't like short men. I will only go for slim women and if they have a big nose, then that's even better.