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Original poster

Men's height

268 replies

Jenna333 · 02/08/2015 22:43

I know this is a shallow question but having looked at some OLD profiles, I got wondering about mens height. I know ultimately it comes down to many factors but I was wondering how other women feel about shorter men e.g 5'4" ish?

OP posts:
GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 12:48

Exactly soup, but the men are getting lambasted for their reactions.

^the appalling reactions to woman fat suit'
woman wearing fat suit shows up to shallow tinder men
'horrifying and depressing^
men abandon date because she's fat in SHOCKING film
see how awful people are when a fat suit goes on

Like wtf. What planet do I live on. No-one has the right to deceive others and then expect the person to be completely okay with it. Yet quite a lot of people in our society think men are sexist, or shallow, horrible, disgusting, rude.. for being mad at being deceived and not being attracted to an obese woman.

Tangoandcreditcards · 03/08/2015 12:48

I'm 5'8'' - have dated a fair few men shorter or the same height as me. DP (father of my DCs) is 5'6'' and I love and fancy him regardless.

I did internet date for years, and when i was young and shallow Wink used to filter for over 5'11'' (I think UK avg is 5'10''). I really wish I hadn't, because so many men height bump themselves up an inch or so to boost their chances (thereby putting me off because they were dishonest when in fact I clearly don't care that much about height).

Incidentally my DM and DF were the same height (DM maybe a smidge taller), both my 5'11'' brothers have married taller women (over 6'), and my DSis's husband is no more than 5'8'' (she's 5'4''), my single DSis has a stated preference for 'short guys'. So maybe our height preferences are just socially conditioned into us from what the norm was when we were growing up!

squoosh · 03/08/2015 12:51

Men lie about height, women lie about weight.

autumnleaves123 · 03/08/2015 12:52

My elder son is very tiny and his predicted height will be 5.4 ft. I do feel for him when I read these posts, as he's such a lovely, good looking boy. But what can we do? C'est la vie. I am aware that short men are not that attractive to women as a whole. It's just a turn off trait in men, just like weight can also be a turn off to many people.

I'm very small too, but I guess being a woman is not too much of a problem.

ElkeDagMeisje · 03/08/2015 12:52

Geeky Thestoic it is based on gender. That a man is less than a man because of his height. Were it not for his gender, a short man's height would not be disparage and he would not be considered unable to protect women from wild beast and marauding gangs.

Its not based on gender. Its based on a gender neutral criterion - height. Its a naturally occurring phenomenon for men to be statistically likely to be taller than women. So its logical for women to have a general preference towards men who are taller than them, because there are likely to be more of them available. People tend to be attracted towards the average, the symmetrical and so on. Equally I've heard many women complain about men once they get over 6 feet 2 or so. But its quite rare in this country.

Its very sexist to suggest that men should be allowed to select a mate based on attractiveness and that women should not.

GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 12:53
Brew
Men's height
ElkeDagMeisje · 03/08/2015 12:54

Or to look at it another way, its about as sexist as suggesting that because some men on internet dating sites specify a woman no bigger than a size 10, all women bigger than a size 10 are discriminated against.

Because logically that would mean that the average woman in Britain, who is a size 14, would be perennially single, because men nearly always rejected them. When in fact the majority of such women are not single.

GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 12:54

Men lie about height, women lie about weight.

And if they do they shouldn't expect to be welcomed with open arms when it comes to date time.

squoosh · 03/08/2015 12:57

I live in Glasgow where men seem on average to be quite short. Most of them seem to do just fine for dates/relationships/marriage.

squoosh · 03/08/2015 12:57

Did I say they should Grays?

GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 12:58

Did I say you did? I was adding to your post, which is what the forum is for. Stop being defensive

squoosh · 03/08/2015 12:59

Maybe take your own advice.

GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 13:01

Good reply, well thought out 10/10

squoosh · 03/08/2015 13:02
Hmm
TheMarxistMinx · 03/08/2015 13:08

Oh I must go to Glasgow, I like short men.

I am quite surprised by the number of women saying that height is important but looks are not. When I sit down, lay down, look over at a distance, or have sex I like to be looking at lovely eyes, a nice face. Height makes no difference and conveys nothing, not even a sense of protection and security unless one is standing close to each other.

I'm 5ft3 (and a half !!) and 5ft6- 5ft8 is perfect. I'm very slim but I like men who are quite muscular and stocky, that makes me feel dainty enough!

ElkeDagMeisje · 03/08/2015 13:11

I was just thinking the same Marxist Grin

My (limited) experience of short men - they are all man and put more effort in. Better a compact man that a lanky beanpole.

But I do absolutely discriminate on looks.

TheWeeBabySeamus · 03/08/2015 13:20

Im 5ft 4in and my only 2 relationships have been with short men.

First guy was 5ft 1in and totally comfortable with it, never asked me not to wear heels and would happily crack jokes about his own height. (Together 8 years)

Second guy was 5ft 4in and VERY sensitive about it. Didnt like me wearing heels, wore shoes with little heels on them and would try and push me down in photos so he looked bigger than me. He was obsessed with the gym and anything that happened was because he was short ( people being rude, queue jumping etc ). It was very tiring ( together about a year).

I dont think it matters how tall a man is - its more about confidence and how they carry themselves. A self assured, relaxed guy who can have a laugh is always attractive to me. Smile

badtime · 03/08/2015 13:23

I have never understood the preference for tall men (in the same way as I don't understand why people prefer blond hair or blue eyes - fine if you like it, but I don't see the appeal particularly). My partner is taller than me, verging on too tall at about 6' (I'm just under 5'5"), and I would never have sought him out, as the height would slightly put me off.

The thing with online dating, though, is that almost all men lie about their height. I remember going to meet someone who was 5'7". In reality, he was about the same height as me, possibly shorter. Pretty much everybody else I met was at least 2 inches shorted than they claimed. The exception was my partner who may actually be taller than he claims!

GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 13:25

I was with a short man, I'm only 5'4 and he was about 5'1 so quite short for a man. It didn't work for me. He used to refer to me as his 'trophy' Hmm think he got off on it really.

squoosh · 03/08/2015 13:26

wore shoes with little heels on them and would try and push me down in photos so he looked bigger than me.

Was it Tom Cruise? He wears shoes with lifts in the heels and in his wedding photo to Katie Holmes he looked mysteriously taller than her.

BalloonSlayer · 03/08/2015 13:26

This thread has really shocked me!

I had no idea so many people would be so precise about what they would find attractive!

Upthread someone said, by way of justification: I'm not sure it comes down to being shallow. I think height/lack of it is something people are attracted to just as much as blonde hair or blue eyes.

I'd say only being attracted to blonde hair or blue eyes was pretty bloody shallow as well!

What happened to getting to know someone and falling for their personality?

I feel really sorry for shorter men now. I had no idea they had to put up with this shit!

TheWeeBabySeamus · 03/08/2015 13:29

Grin Squoosh

GraysAnalogy · 03/08/2015 13:29

People can't help what they're attracted to.

People don't chose to have specific requirements.

You could get the fittest man in the world in front of me but if he's shorter than me I don't feel that flutter in my belly or the other tell tale signs of attraction.

If that's shallow blame biology not the person.

gymboywalton · 03/08/2015 13:34

i am 5'11"

i have found shorter men attractive but once you are going out/on a date it is not so good

i went out on a date with a guy who was 5'4" once and he was lovely-really fun and sexy but i just felt stupid and colossal and unattractive. I had to bend down to kiss him and it just felt wrong.

it wasn't about him but about how his height made ME feel. Does that make sense?

interestingly all the really tall men i know-like 6' 6" + are all with very small women-like 5 foot ish.

AICM · 03/08/2015 13:41

When it comes to attraction everybody is allowed to be as ageist, heightist, hairist, intelligenceist, muscleist, boobist, weightist and every other “ist” as they want to be. Just don’t be rude to those who don’t do it for you.
I think this will fall harder on women than men as in today’s society women are subjected to more unreasonable physical standards than men.