Horrendous situation, please help

[spaghettihead5]

In recent months and weeks I've realised for definite H is very active during the night, then that he has an ow (he denies it). I gave him divorce petition on Mon.
In the last week I've realised that whereas I thought he was going out in the middle of the night for liaisons, in fact someone unknown to me is coming in to our family home, possibly with their own key. I've heard sexual activity downstairs in the sitting room and in two of the upstairs bedrooms while my children & I sleep in adjoining rooms. OMG. I'm frightened how he would react if I confronted him while DTD but I can hear a woman climax, humping, blow jobs etc almost every night if the past week.
I've talked to a solicitor about urgent next steps, the risk to the children.
I want to make sure that when custody of the children is discussed he will be unable to have them overnight. Can't believe this is happening.
What else do I need to get in place to protect the children and I before I confront him? How to confront him?Do I need evidence apart from my witness testimony on what I've heard because H will say it's such an improbable, outrageous suggestion I have imagined it and maybe I should get my mental health checked out.

ffs go downstairs. Run downstairs there's no way the 2 of them can possibly stop what they're doing rush out while presumably getting dresses and for her to leave.

I find it almost impossible to believe there's ow every single night of the week. Sounds more like he's got a porn habit.

Do not however phone 999 and report an intruder and have them 'uncover it' as a Pp suggested. It's nothing to do with the police

Text his mother? The mind boggles.

My fantasy wishlist would be having to move out ASAP + shame because it's on public record + questions over his responsibility as a parent, including driving after virtually no sleep.
H even lied to the police, denying ow (a long separate story). I'm concerned a judge would believe him rather than me, he's so cool and smooth in his manner.

I am going to withdraw from this and go to bed. Your responses are becoming increasingly concerning. You will gain nothing by waiting and gathering 'proof'. Your footage is unlikely to be admissible and you cannot show or send it to anyone without breaching The Communications Act, The Malicious Communications Act or the Protection from Harrassment Act. You breaking the law is hardly going to improve your position. Just get out of the situation as quickly as you can and protect your children.

Can you not catch them at it in the daughters /pretty/ room? If that's upstairs, short of jumping out the window they can't run into the garden. And why would your husband run outside naked with the ow anyway?

If this were a novel there would be too many plotholes

Hmm, I could drive the children home tomorrow but they would be sad at missing the end of their holiday.
Please give me some slack. This is enormously difficult. I don't have legal expertise and every legal person seems to give different advice anyway.
I guarantee if I go downstairs now I won't catch them. H hasn't conned me into thinking he is a loving, caring partner for many many years by making sloppy mistakes. He is extremely calculating. He is a nasty man.

My best chance at catching them is at home when they are in DD's bedroom (pretty or not if anyone wants to obsess about it) next door to mine.
H and ow can run outside naked here, we are surrounded by fields and trees, that's all.

Well go and stand beside her car waiting for her. Then act all innocent when they come round to it 'i woke up and saw this strange car outside i was about to phone the police'

they've apparantly been shaghing for over 2 hours now I doubt either will have the energy to run anywhere

Can you go see your GP? You don't sound very well.

By the way, first you said it was the lounge, definitely not a bedroom, and now you're saying it's always been your daughters bedroom. It does make a difference and you changing it makes me concerned that you are feeling very 'under attack' by your partner/ ex partner, but it's not clear what's actually happening and what might be fuelled by fear and late night noises.

I'm not troll hunting, but I am concerned about you.

Then why don't you go downstairs.

After they have run outside you lock all of the doors and they will the be stuck outside naked.

You can then have a good look around to see what they have left behind.

I wonder what his story would be??

Well, if you really are unable to go downstairs in your own home or get a camera set up, resolve it by phoning the police on your mobile to tell them you are frightened there is an intruder in your home.

There are many options open to you to verify this OP, but you seem to prefer your own unproven version.

Have you suffered from mental health problems in the past? You remind me of someone who had Munchausens by Proxy.

My MIL has paranoid schizophrenia and your posts sound just like her letters she sends to us when she's having a bit of a bout. You need to see your GP my love.

Fgs go downstairs! This is the maddest thing alive ever read on here.

There's no mental illness here just a prankster having a laugh at people's expense. Must admit they're always a great read when people do this.

I think this may be the craziest thread I've read on mumsnet. Absolutely bonkers.

So he shags another woman in the room next to yours but he won't get caught as he's 'cunning!'

He's been doing it for years but you only found out ten days ago.

You don't want to go downstairs as you'll 'blow your cover.'

You can hear her climax but won't go downstairs because they will run out into the fields naked as soon as you touch your door.

I really hope this is a wind up.

If this is true ( and I suspect it's not, as it sounds completely ridiculous now), OP, you need to see your GP when you get home from holiday or at least voice your fears to a close and trusted family member or friend to get their support in helping you sort this holy mess out.

I'm glad others have suggested visiting the doctor, as this does read like paranoid delusions.
If you go downstairs, you're convinced that the only reason you won't see another woman is that they would have jumped out of a window.

If you set up a camera, you'll convince yourself that 'they' have edited the tapes or are hiding in other rooms.

I think you do need to consider the possibility that when your husband says you are imagining things and need help, he is correct.

Are you sure these aren't delusions? You say they are directly below you and then go on to say you are staying in a cottage. I'm not been unkind, I am hoping you get the help you need.

So run down and surprise them and let them run out into the fields naked.

Then shut and bolt the back door and the front door too and make sure the windows are shut.

They will have to somehow manage to find clothing, locked out in broad daylight and without keys to any car.

The cottage and downstairs is the holiday home. Her dh shags in his daughters room in their family home.

Anyway in the nicest possible way op you need to go see a GP pretty sharpish.

This is as mad as a box of frogs

I'm starting to think that none of this is real.

Why not just go downstairs as pp said. They'll hear you. Leg it out the house/cottage and you can lock the doors.

Or just call the police. if things are as you say they are they'd help you.

what a horrendous situation. i agree with scaring them outside and locking the doors. you will find evidence.

I'm starting to feel delusional myself. This is the oddest thing I've ever read.