Desperately Trying to Move On - My Divorce from Mr WT Part 3 - It's Nearly OVER!

[TheFormidableMrsC]

I am so grateful to all of those who have followed and supported me throughout this bloody ordeal! I hope this will be the last one.one and it will be over very soon! Thread 1 : www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2030270-PLEASE-HELP-DESPERATE-AND-AWFUL-DIVORCE?
Thread 2 : www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2137545-Whos-Desperate-and-Awful-Now-Story-of-My-Divorce-from-Mr-WT-Part-2

It's a shame there are some sad specimens of malehood around (deliberately not using the word 'man' here, they aren't) to ruin it - both for the women they hurt and for the mistrust they cause in those women who may then very well miss out on the really good guys who really do exist.

I have nothing but contempt for people who walk out and abandon their children.

'Loose penii' , heh heh. I think I'm going to find use for that phrase. Hmm, what would be the female equivalent? Libertine Labia?

It's always the children who suffer, isn't it? 'Public' infidelity and bringing the OW or OM into the children's lives before the door is shut behind them is unfortunately becoming commonplace.

As horrible as it sounds, at least they won't be alone as it just seems there are so many men who pull this shite and women who are complicit (and vice versa). There are now so many children of divorce that they usually have others around them so they don't feel 'odd man out'. When I was little divorce was still stigmatized and children of divorced parents were 'pitied' and made to feel 'different'. Nowadays, they see many others in their same situation. Kind of a shame, but in the long run better for them to feel not so alone.

OW in their moment of glory seem to forget this ...."if he cheats with you, he will cheat on you"!

Oh no no Beyonce...you have to remember that my husband "bumped into" OW recent widow two weeks before he left me, they fell in love at first sight and he walked out of here and straight into her house. They didn't have sex until then either. Jackanory is alive and kicking in their world! . It's a pity for them that I am such a voracious soul...!

Across - you're so right. When I was young, "blended" families were really unusual in our area; now it's an oddity when you're still all the same family unit. When I was pg with DS2, who is only 5y younger than DS1 btw, they asked me in the hospital as a routine question if it was the same father! I was a wee bit shocked, I have to say, but I understand the reasons for asking.

Yes Thumb, I agree with Across too. I think it's so bloody sad though. I will never forgive my husband for doing this to my son. It is made worse by the fact that he has been deeply affected his entire life by his parents' divorce yet has happily inflicted the same trauma on DS and OW has been entirely complicit in that. Quite happy to play "daddy" to yet another stepchild though and she is quite happy for my son to suffer the consequences of her decisions. Disgusting individuals.

So, back to court we go. This is becoming a joke. I think I mentioned either upthread or on the last thread that the consent order is STILL incorrect as this time it included a no-cohabitation clause which District Judge Slow-Speaker had refused to include. I think I also mentioned that when I contacted Mr WT's solicitor, she informed me she was no longer instructed! IN THE MIDDLE OF DEALING WITH THE CONSENT ORDER! Quite unbelievable. I had to write to the court about this as I am not prepared to sign an incorrect document and I have received a letter stating that it will be dealt with at the next hearing at the end of July. Why is this man so fucking stupid? All it will do is increase his legal fees and create yet more delays. He doesn't get that it would have been far more sensible to have just had the consent order corrected, I could have signed and that would have been in. But no....

So still no divorce in sight. Will I ever get rid of this twat?!

Not so much fucking stupid as fucking arrogant twat who thinks he can do what he likes just because. And no court or judge is going to tell him what he can and can't do!

I just despair, I really do. It is bad enough that he has lied about his salary and signed the part of the document that declares he is solvent, when he presented bankruptcy twice at different hearings. That did come back to bite him on his lardy arse because that meant I received all the equity in the family home. He has just cut his salary down to ensure DS receives minimal maintenance. Nice man. Yet apparently attempts to "make up twice" whatever that means to DS rather than properly provide for him. The mind boggles, it really does...

I've figured it out! The reason this is dragging on so long is because you don't need a divorce, you need an exorcism! No mere judge can rid you of a demon. And an effing dense one at that!

It's all ego, isn't it? No matter what you offer or say, his ego forces him to screw up his face like a big baby and say 'NO!" because he can't stand the thought of you 'winning'. Arsehole. With Pineapple Pauline whispering in his ear it's just what you'd expect, unfortunately.

Ha ha ha Across, that's it! An exorcism! The ridiculous thing is that there are actually no "winners" in this at all. Yes I have got a reasonable amount of equity but it is of no use unless I move halfway across the country and uproot the kids. I am nearly 46 years old with an autistic 4 year old and I have no idea how he is going to progress and I get zero support either practically or financially from his father. I have a friend with a daughter with the same condition and the hell they have gone through since she entered her teens has wrecked their lives. I have been out of the workplace for years now (aside from "our" company) and know that I am going to really struggle to get a job adequate enough to support us all without retraining or even at all. I am not sitting in somebody's house, paying no rent or mortgage and swanning around in OW's cars having holidays and flying lessons and working here and there as and when it suits. He has left me in a mess and no amount of what happens in court will change that. If he thinks I've "won" he is a deluded as he is thick.

However, it will be OK because I will make sure of it, somehow. He will also have to face up to the fact that the nominal order will force him to support his son properly. His attitude beggars belief, it really does!

Anyway, hope all is well with you and DB

PM'd you.

He's taking flying lessons? If I were his instructor I'd tell him where to fly off to!!!

I have my wooden stake and cross at the ready. Oh, wait. That's for a bloodsucking vampire, not a demon. Hmm, on second thought the cross and stake may be more appropriate, no?

Oh and if you're still twitching the internet equivalent of net curtains, Mr WT……Phfffft!

Across, got it thank you my lovely, will respond shortly .

I wouldn't let him anywhere near a plane personally, but that's because I know him. I can't believe I encouraged the firearms.... That hobby particularly allowed him to have affairs without me being suspicious but now I look back and having seen his disclosure, he was not where he said he was in terms of going off to the shooting ground...

Anyway, an interesting evening has ensued. We were going to go out but DS was exhausted after a long day (contact) and I have had a bit of an issue that has required my attention. I have discovered that somebody is purporting to be me on Facebook. The "pretend" me has sent out friend requests. I am very paranoid about social media at the moment because of the situation I find myself in so have reported to FB (as have others) and have reported to Police to cover myself. I have also put a post on my page to say that this is happening. I don't know, maybe I am being a bit paranoid but my name is reasonably unusual so it does concern me.

Anyway, off for a glass of wine and a spring roll

Ha! Somebody is getting depserate!

Bogey...x

I wonder who could be stupid enough to do that ??? So easily traceable

Weirdly, page has been deleted. Thankfully I have got screenshots of the friend requests and messages from the same friends etc. They can trace all activity via IP addresses so that is what I will now press for.

Wouldn't you pressing to find out who has been allegedly impersonating you be construed by fuckwits as harassment, MrsC?

Annie...quite possibly! However, FB have been very helpful and I I have enough information now. Will let the police deal with it although it may be something or nothing ...

Ha! I've got it. I've worked it out. Why the FB thing, why the arbitrary getting rid of counsel, why the MumsNet stalking.

It's because Plastic Pinapple Pauline wants to be you and Mr WT wants to be with you!

Ta da. All makes sense now.

I'm an idiot brilliant!

Hope you get peace soon Formidable indeed MrsC

How depressingly childish . Why the hell don't the perpetrators just get a life? Or do they do this because outside of persecuting you, they have no life?

Pathetic.

• 'perpetrators' and 'they' used in the 'we have no idea who the perpetrator/s is/are and cannot possibly speculate' sense, as used regularly in the media etc.

Whoever decided to impersonate you has been very, very stupid. FB will have their ip address - deleting the page makes no difference. Unless they are advanced enough to cove their tacks (unlikely I'm guessing) That ip address is linked to an internet or mobile service provider (virgin, Sky, Vodaphone, whoever) and they will have ALL their details - location, name, address, times, dates.
normally only released if it's related to a police investigation I would say ...

MrsC - "Good thinking Batman" springs to mind.

Him kiboshing with the Facebook agenda shows there is a modicum of intelligence within him. Somewhere.

As I've always observed: He presumes he's the most intelligent man in the room.

Only when he's alone is that the fact.

Heh heh, good point, Wow!

Stupid arses.

MrsC, did you see the thread started a within the last week from a woman saying she had done something, was on bail, and that she would lose her children because she would be going to jail. The ages of the children were different but it was just a day or two after we had visitors to this thread and it immediately made me very suspicious.

It would tie in with the FB malarky and what went on on this thread?

But of course it is possible that it was all a mere co-incidence.

Have you got a link to that weebirdie ? Think MrsC might find that useful...