the Sordid affair thread - the 'story' goes on

[TealFanClub]

Ok for those of use who were just settling down to catch up on it..

here is what happened next

I told daughter one - I coudnt keep the pretence going any longer, and my lack of appetite and sallow appearance was a giveaway.

[TealFanClub]

how are we going to bump OFF the female solicitor

OH HO HO HO I KNOW

Old mills and boon trick
the solicitor is called Charlie - you thought was a woman but is actually a haughty steel jawed man

" i would never have let you go' he breathes heavily as i pass on my way out

[TheTravellingLemon]

I pour myself a much needed glass of wine and sink gratefully into my overstuffed sofa.

My mind starts to race with the events of day and just as I think I cannot stand it anymore, the doorbell rings.

I approach the door with caution, but delighted to see that it is Lovely Friend with a bottle of wine and a takeaway.

We eat and drink and laugh and cry for hours. Then she says something about the wedding dress. How did she know about the wedding dress? I certainly didn't tell her. Then it hits me like a train. Lovely friend is little slut.

She has no idea I've twigged as is still laughing drunkenly as I reach for the knife.

[TealFanClub]

I remain business like, but remember the firm reassurance of his handshake

I giggle at the thought of what else might be firm, then remember what I have to do

I have to Sell DOBBIN, the best show jumping horse in the South East


cries with laughter at her own post, rather rudely

[StrawberryMojito]

Oh thank god for this thread. Has it been confirmed as definitely a troll? It had my usually crap troll radar going from the start.

[TealFanClub]

LOL at lemon

[Skiptonlass]

Wow. Conclusive proof that being pregnant and hormonal has blunted my trolldar...

Maybe I should write a bonk buster during my maternity leave? Can I base it in the leafier parts of Edinburgh or is it de rigeur to have these things set in the Cotswolds...

[TealFanClub]

Lemon rewind from murder
I think Lovely friend needs to start doing some minor betrayals first

[Loval]

But who will polish the horse box?
Here, OP, you poor devastated thing
and don't forget some

[DumbledoresKnobblyWand]

Lemon

[UnspecialSnowflake]

I did wonder about how those threads, they read like a novel, they seemed almost too perfectly paced and plotted. They were well written though, I wonder if it was a try out for a novel or script.

[MrsSheRa]

This was a troll??

I KNEW it!! I fucking KNEW IT.

I was thinking about it today and thought, if I just discovered my husband had been that duplicitous for a year I wouldn't have had the energy to write so much about it on a forum in REAL TIME. No way.

I am so relieved because it was HIDEOUS.

[TealFanClub]

lol at polishing the horse box phanarggggh

[TheTravellingLemon]

Good idea, then there can be flashbacks to all the little clues and minor betrayals.

[TealFanClub]

tonight i am cooking couscous and lamb from ottolenghi for the girls

D1 will e back from work.
I need to tell them - but HOW

[Mrsmorton]

This thread is brilliant!! Love lemon update!!

My trolldar was actually pinging about half way through the first thread and I've NEVER been right before.

[usualsuspect333]

lol at DOBBIN the wonder horse.

[MyRightFoot]

i tie the belt of my orla kieley mac around my slender waist and step out of "our home". the home where he and i poured so much love...ah.. the lovemaking in front of our log fire, winters in the kitchen keeping toasty warm in front of the Aga.

[TealFanClub]

I might phone lovely friend - Susi ( note naff name for extra hatred potential)

I wonder if SHE is free tonight ( looks at Lemon)

[TealFanClub]

( bugger i have to go to the gym, i am sniggerin at this so much - lol at slender)

[TheseAreTheBestDaysOfMyLife]

Hahahaha can't stop laughing!!!

[TealFanClub]

LEMON


I am going to PHONE Suzi - lovely friend


No doubt she will pop over in her capacious 4 by 4 vehicle

[TheseAreTheBestDaysOfMyLife]

Still can't get it in my head that it's not true tho'...it's just about all I've been thinking of the last few days!!

[stevienickstophat]

Frigging knew it.

It was the wedding dress that did it.

So many people invested in that thread and gave up their own stories.

Fucker.

[plumstone]

Dobbin will be sold, but after a heartbreaking weekend DD 2 will find a manky nag in a field and persuade you to buy it.

For nothing other than Board and lodging a tall slightly gangly youth with chiseled cheek bones and a haunting wistful look and soulful eyes, will polish said horse box, and take care of all thos manly jobs around the house. DD 2 will fall madly in love, and train said manky nag into a champion show jumper, tragically sacrificing her Team GB spot for Rio to walk you down the aisle to chiseled jaw semi retired barrister, but in 2020 will take individual gold in show jumping.

Skip - having lived in leafier parts of Edinburgh, it could definitely give the Cotswalds a run for its money