Finding excuses to keep this abusive twunt in your life is not only an insult to our intelligence, it's a crying shame for your dc to have to watch and/or listen to their dm being denigrated and degraded and have her attention entirely taken up with thoughts of how best she can please her tormentor.
You're not living with him, you're not economically dependent on him, so wtf haven't you binned him?
I daresay you're accustomed to making certain sacrifices for your dc such as not leaving them home alone while you go out partying, not buying yourself new clothes when theirs need replacing, squandering money that's needed to pay bills/put food on the table etc, so why can't you put them above your need to please and appease a man who so clearly has nothing but contempt for you?
What aren't you telling us? Is he living with another woman? Are you scared of him? From everything you've said about the way he behaves towards you, it's unlikely that he confines himself solely to verbally and emotionally using and abusing.
As for as having 'terrible luck' with men goes, it's a case of making your own by rejecting any who don't enrich and enhance your life and make your world infinitely better for having them in it.
If you were on your own, meh - carry on choosing abusive tossers and losers, but you have dc and that places you under obligation to make sure any relationships you have with the opposite sex are positive role models for them, otherwise they'll grow up to have the same negative experiences you have.
Keep reading the sticky, do the Freedom Programme, and instead of saying "it just is" start saying 'I am just not going to put up with his crap any more'.