DH doesnt find me attractive when I am....

[jessicaandrebeccasmummy]

not dolled up and fat!

Thats it really.

I had a conversation with him over the last few nights about his lack of affection, only ever showing me he loves me when he wants sex, and only ever being complimented when I have dressed up and made an effort.

As a SAHM, I tend to get up, get washed, chuck on jeans and a top and run a brush through my hair and thats it, as it is more comfortable than "dressing up" to be with the girls all day.

It has come to light that he feels i have totally let myself go, need to lose a lot of weight and start wearing clothes that make me look better.

Although I totally understand his point, I am quite upset that he cant show me he loves me when im in scruff clothes. We are totally skint, so cant afford to go out and buy nice new clothes, so other than try and work on losing weight, I feel like I am losing a no-win battle.

Im not really sure why I am posting this - he is right and I know he is, but I just dont know where to start in making myself more "desirable" for him.

We have a good marriage generally but I get hurt at the fact he doesnt show me he loves me, he tells me all the time, but does nothing to back it up.

Thats it really.... feel free not to post.... because I dont really know what I expect to gain from posting this! Just wanted to let it all out I guess.

Thanks for reading.

I am SO glad that high waists are coming back, as are looooooooong jumpers

Buy a bellyhugger. Honestly. Best garment ever and it keeps your kidneys warm.

Err..link?

long vests
long vests
long vests

Then you can wear whatever jumper or top you see fit and you saggy crepey bits will be hidden from view

22 months apart with my births, I am tall and a size 12 and also have a belly

but who the hell cares?

I repeat: long vests

gap and top shop have long vests

I should be on commission for these

You can buy magic pants for that price in M & S....

Primark is also good for not expensive but decent looking clothes, great for kids stuff too. Glad you're feeling more positive today.
I really think feeling sexy and attractive comes from within. It's much, much more than just what you look like .

I second OO

long vests
long vests
long vests

they will take 10lb off your appearance

if I took 10lbs off I would look too thin

I try and find vests that are more like camisoles, with a lace trim, Debenhams (!!!!) do good ones

I think everyone has a post baby stomach don't they?

Even posh and she is a walking xray.

Maybe we should get them out and be proud?

YES long vests

H&M have some good ones

Magic pants don't do the same job - this isn't to hold you in, it's to stop people seeing bare crepey bulgy bits. And it keeps you warm when you're feeding. By all means wear magic pants as well though

hunker I have missed you
I dream about you Harpsi and QV last night, you all look fab in RL

Sorry about the hi-jack

Vests don't work though, not with feeding. You still have to lift it up. I can't get my nork over the top of a vest without stretching it out of all proportion. And some things I don't want to wear a whole vest under.

keeps you warm when you are feeding?

can I not eat my sandwich with a cold tummy then?

heh heh heh heheheheheheheheheh

Oh, Boris!

Was it a nice dream?

OO, no, you must wear a bellyhugger to eat a sandwich. Am that you would try to eat one without one on, tbh...

"I can't get my nork over the top of a vest without stretching it out of all proportion"

nork or vest?

I am somewhat tempted by the belly hugger thing, but am contemplating buying actual vests instead. Never owned any, but am really feeling the cold this year ...

Both, OO

(Am rofling at titter being part of your post there though )

It was a lovely dream, we were all getting drunk somewhere, and I knew it was you and Harpsi straight away

You were all very lovely to me aswell

That's not a dream, WB, that's a premonition

Awwww shucks