Letter to my exh's OW. That's the first one he had. The one that ripped my family to shreds.
Omg! Where to start. Well, to give you the benefit of the doubt you don't know what lies he was telling you as well as me because why else would you become the OW in the first place. What sort of a woman sets outs to ensnare another woman's husband? Were you that desperate for a man? Wouldn't it have been kinder to have said to lover boy. Ok we have feelings for one another but before this goes any other further , leave your wife first. Then I know that you are genuine and your marriage truly has broken down.
Well that's what I would have said because I have scruples and obviously you don't.
Did you want my life? I know when your husband ended your marriage you had to give up your nice house in a nice part of town and live in a council house. I spoke to him you know. He said he had bettered himself. Wonder what he meant by that? Also he said to me about my husband ' get rid! The mans an arse' but more of 'the arse' later. Anyway, my husband possibly looked like he was rich pickings. He had a very good job with a good career and we had a nice lifestyle. He was very good at bragging so maybe you thought he had more than he really did because let's be honest he was a bit of a fat bastard wasn't he? Trouble is, he was my fat bastard...so refer yourself back to paragraph one.
Now then, something you didn't know about 'our fat bastard'. He was very, very careless. While he was up to his eyeballs in glorious fornication with you ( more on that later ) he was dropping clangers at work. Not that, that would worry you of course, but he could have lost his job. Refer back to paragraph two. Now then, he was cunning and wily enough to sort it out, damage limitation I think it's called but something you probably aren't aware of is we all shared a computer and he often forgot to log out. Oh the fun we had with your emails Cl...., oops I nearly let your name slip there, silly me, we can all be careless but he made his carelessness an art form.
So, we all knew about your blindfold and your little triangle of pubic hair poking below some garment designed to titillate the bollox off him and without seeing you naked I can describe exactly where your tattoos are. What a laugh we had when the girls came round with a bottle of wine on a night.
Course this wasn't straight away you understand because your smutty affair ripped the heart out of my decent family life. Yes, that's right back to paragraph one again but at least there was some compensation in knowing I wasn't the only one crying my eyes out but you were too because lover boy wouldn't leave his little in- the - dark wifey and you had people drive past my house to see if his car was there and you were checking him out too. I bet that was a real barrel of laughs for you. Did you write a letter to Dear Deirdre... Stating ...my boyfriend is living with his wife. Well, that's what happens when you take up with a married man....they are...well...married! So in between playing 'hide the sausage ' and ' we need more than one blindfold because he's a double bagger' the real nail biting excitement was only just beginning for you. Were they having sex?Well, I'm not going to tell you. I'll let you sweat that one out but I hope you had the sense to check into the GUM clinic like I had too when I found out about the business trips and the prostitutes.
So, naive OW lets get down to the nitty gritty? How old were you ? 40 odd ! Did your mother teach you nothing because mine taught me never to trust anyone who cheats on their wife because that makes them......a liar and a cheat! That's right. Why would you throw in your lot with someone like that? Well, there's no fool like an old fool is there but at least you had the sense to finally dump him when you found out he wasn't where he said he was. That must have been heartbreaking for you to find out that he wasn't in the middle east after all for a week having job interviews and trying to find a flat for your new life together. No, he was on a two week family holiday and every time we had a photo taken I made sure he was right in the middle of things, near a famous landmark....just in case you ever wanted proof of course. How we all laughed. Those that were in on the joke of course ...which left only him and my little grandson who was too young to understand why all the adults were falling about laughing all the time.
And finally. I'll be dead honest. I felt pretty crap about myself when you were carrying on with my husband. I've always kept myself smart and never let myself go but knowing that you were ten years younger ...hurt. In my very vivid imagination I pictured you as a smoking hot femme fatale. Like a modern day Sophia Loren( ok, ok with four tattoos then) with your blindfold on and whip to hand ( although I never saw any marks on those white blubbery arse cheeks of his) . I wondered if I'd ever passed you in town, at the pub or supermarket but I wasn't going to torture myself over it and then several years ago a friend outed you on the social media.
Omg...you've let yourself go love haven't you since you split up? How on earth did you manage to get so......fat? I mean , we all put on a bit of weight over the years ...who hasn't? But you've taken 'putting on a bit of timber' to a whole new level. We could all eat like that sweetheart ....but the question is...should we?
Anyway, you've moved on and so have I. You did me a favour at the end of the day. I'm ten times happier than I ever was with 'our little prince '. I just wish the pair of you had come clean and done it in a decent, honest and dignified manner.