HOBBITS BAR - still finding it hard to move on ......(part 3)

[greenberet]

here we go ladies & drifting dogs welcome too of the harvey kind!

grab your drinks - , and izzietinis dependant on time of day & how we are feeling

Original thread

Part two

anyone welcome, new, old, lurkers we share with you all.
no requirements re posting as & when, one offs, rants, extreme rants, blubbing we dont mind, we've done it all .

we like songs, we like pics, we like humour, we like the words "twunts" and "fuckwittery" & we send each other often!

Our motto KOKO and our theme tune

join us

Has anyone heard from WWK today? Just wondering if she's OK after yesterday.

I'm okay thanks! I woke yesterday morning, somewhat hungover, having vague memories of locking myself out the house at some point...

Day 1 was pretty intense emotionally - I think I've been fighting fuckwittery for so long, that the fact that it's completely over, meant for the first time in a long time, I could just 'grieve'. So I got the house cleaned up, and all the paperwork binned or filed. I've got to make some big decisions in the coming weeks about where to live, what job to get/do, got to sell and buy a car, as well as other no longer required bits. It's time to move on, and I'm desperate to move on and put the past behind me. However, it's also scary having to make decisions without talking to anyone about them. Just getting on and making the best of it.

Anyway up early today as I've a to-do list as long as my arm! Take care. I will catch up with everyone soon.

Lovely to hear from you WWK.

I'm not surprised that you were emotional yesterday, and I'm glad that you are now able to continue with your emotional recovery.

As you say, lots of decisions to make. But, hey, don't forget to give yourself a breather too. Some decisions are easier than others, eg car. And the more important decisions, well, you can't rush them. You know all this, of course. Because you're a smart woman. In control of your own destiny. And oh how I envy you.

Enjoy your productive day, and don't forget to factor in some quality time for the most important person.....you!

We are all looking forward to following you on your new journey. Take care xx

great to hear well - still one step at a time though for a bit- take it slow and enjoy each one - there is no rush - the rest of the time is yours - just go with it and it will work out for you. big hugs xx

Good morning WWK you did us proud. You're probably coming down from a whole lot of adrenaline and having some mixed feelings I would imagine. Hope you have a productive day but don't feel guilty if you need to rest for a bit.

WWK I don't know if you're up for this, but have you thought of starting a new thread? Something like Dear Me? This one being all about you moving onwards and upwards. It would be hugely appreciated by so many people, both for people who "need" to see how the future really does look better, and also just appreciated by all of us who just want to follow how you are doing, because we care. As well as maybe being your own testament to yourself. Or is this where the book starts?

well second that idea of izzies -

Good morning, WWK , it's over my love, so many mixed emotions I'm sure, but the main one is "You're Freeeeeee!" And with a good outcome to boot
Lots of places to go and people to see, a wonderful new life beckons, involving your talent for writing, an exciting future to plan out. I hope you'll still find time to pop into the bar now and again to make us all feel that there is a life on the other side of divorce!

I am so happy for you, x

Good morning WWK and congratulations on your well deserved hangover

I think one of the things i will be looking forward most to is getting rid of all the extraneous paperwork and files saved on the computer - and I haven't even started court stuff...yet!

Hi WWK....Glad to know you're doing ok.I think Izzie idea of a new thread is great but only when you're ready. No pressure from us girls. xx

My weasel has again surpassed himself. I got 3 letters from his solicitor yesterday. 1 telling me he is want to change contact dates agreed in court, 1 telling me he wants 3 others dates as well, and the finally one telling me he's stopping the maintenance for the children!

Yep...no money as of 20th. What a great provider he is. His excuse is that he is in financial difficulties and he has a £500 overdraft. We I can bloody beat that. I've got thousands of pounds on my credit card (solicitors fees) and another solicitors bill waiting to be paid (the full estimate is eye watering). He can get more money by working overtime but I cannot as I'm still on long term sick because of my lung condition.

I will never understand how these men can just shed all responsibility and think it's there right to still dictate to us. I want him to rot in hell for what he's done and is continuing to do to my girls.

why £500?? For someone in his job? Bloody peanuts. And how sick to stop maintenance for the kids and AT THE SAME TIME want more access!!

You know what, though, I've been properly on these threads for 4.5 months and absolutely nothing surprises me anymore.

Yes and I too want that weasel to rot in hell with the rest of the bastards we refer to on here. Actually, I'd like them to rot on Earth first.

I'm getting impatient for Karma.

Actually, the Weasel is in a whole league of his own. I would happily .......given half the chance. Sick bastard

why I assume you will be speaking to your solicitor re the legal remedies available re maintenance? And I'm so sorry that this has come on top of everything else. It's absolutely sick, despicable. Keep posting on here, we all care, and we can at least listen to you vent, if it helps xx

izzie...Thanks for your kind words...I'm currently sitting here waiting for my solicitor to ring back. Feels like groundhog day. Just when I thought I was moving forward the bastard bites back again. xx

WTAF? Why my love, I want to come and actually physically bite that wankbadger on the arse, never mind a virtual arse kicking!
How can he do that to his children? How can he look himself in the mirror each morning is beyond me, you cannot just stop maintenance surely, does he expect you to live on fresh air? What a twat!
Sorry, got the rage on your behalf, not good for my blood pressure which is already Sky high, there must be something legally you can do re solicitor, just want you to know we are all here for you.

You are moving forward my love. Think of court recently. This is probably his revenge. And as I said about his last strike, this is another own goal for him. Hold on in there, and let him keep digging his way out of your lives.

A police officer, financial difficulties. That's not allowed, is it? Thinking back to my previous job

My solicitor has told me that there's no need to rush with a reply to him! He has the court order he has to comply (yeh) - and he cannot change the dates or add more unless there was a specific clause in the order (excellent - no specific clause - tick). As for the weasel withholding maintenance...we can claim it back - as we go through the financials (back in court when he also has to disclose what he's done with the Audi).

So I need to calm down...pizza already in oven....this comfort eating is a bloody nightmare. I also have a chocolate orange with my name on it for supper!

I think you're right girls...he is taking revenge for me daring to stand up to him. I also have a list of stuff that he's done that doesn't comply to police discipline code etc etc so financial difficulties can now be added to that.

If I'm going down I'll bloody take the bastard with me!

KOKO xx ....I live for another day.

Thank goodness this popped up in "most read"...I didn't realise things had moved on so swiftly! I am shamelessly place marking

Why I'm glad the solicitor got back to you and you are reassured. Hope you calm down soon. As for taking him down with you....you're not going anywhere, long term, my lady, but you can still kick him there if you want. Plenty of volunteers are lining up to help or watch, either being very acceptable!

Comfort eating/divorce diet. Meh, whatever! Whatever it takes. Xxxxx

Whyme, I have to dash out now, but I just wanted to say your prick of an ex is in the same league as mine. Mine has paid me maintenance of £50.00 this month. He has gone from £300 per month to £150 and now £50. Yet he turned up wearing a brand new sparkly Barbour jacket and was able to spend in the region of £500 on toys for DS's birthday a couple of weeks ago. Utter fucking wanker. Excuse language.

And again they read from the divorcing mans script....financially cripple woman for looking after kids...tick...start wearing expensive new clothes...tick...buy children expensive presents...tick. What planet are they on...the planet of no responsibility?

And don't apologies for the language....the air is blue when I think of the weasel. I don't think I can express what I think of him any other way.

xx

So sorry on your behalf whyme of course on planet Twunt it's all your fault, none of theirs, and you are to blame for the situation you are in now

i like Hobbit's suggestion but suggests she gets a rabies shot first!

Who mentioned chocolate oranges? - I have at least 6 hidden in a cool box (from the mice and I do mean real mice )

And again they read from the divorcing mans script.......start wearing expensive new clothes

I'm interested in what people think of this: the BucketFatMan has definitely NOT bought any new clothes, let alone expensive ones. He actually looks like the person who was Left in the marriage, rather than the bolter, ie he looks old, unkempt appearance, wearing the worst of his clothes. He has splashed out on a new car, though. In fairness he had to change it. But he spent twice what I did. Brand new. But he doesn't seem overly enamoured with his choice. He went for the one we had decided to get before we split. That was practicality over style, ie AWD and light on petrol costs. The one he was drooling over was much more stylish, but a non estate version of his old car, the one I had been driving. His justification for his choice was that he wanted a change of model. But his overall thing was "oh I didnt really know what to go for". The only thing that seems to have pleased him is that it is brand new and he got a hefty discount not half as much as I did, though, by buying a used car