id love closure on Fri night so I could move past it but ur right I dont think im ever going to get it.. really hope this doesnt become a pattern - op, I think it will become a pattern, unless there are clear boundaries in place to stop him doing it again.
This means consequences. You can't rely on him just not doing it again out of the goodness of his heart; after all, he's done it once, moaned that you 'keep bringing it up' so you stop. Job done. Next time, you won't 'keep bringing it up' and he won;t bother giving you any explanation (or respect). The next time, he will just do as he pleases...
You need to stop this now, and that does mean you have to bite the bullet, annoy him by demanding respect (and an explanation), give him an ultimatum. And mean it.
Don't move in with him. Put it all on hold, until you have his respect, and an assurance that it won't happen again (and if it does, you are out.) Infact. I'd chuck him until I had closure/complete trust in him again. Let him do the work on your relationship.
Without boundaries and consequences, he will do it again. Why wouldn't he? He gets to live the single life, with a little woman at home who 'doesn't really mind' (otherwise she'd say/do something, right?
) - why would he change a perfect (to him) cushy life?