Heard dp having sex.

[Disgustedandhurt]

I received a whatsapp voice message from dps ex on Boxing Day of them having sex I haven't said anything to him yet as I don't know what to do I feel physically sick.

PP Which we've just done. I didn't realise it was different on each phone. I've tried to engage with OP but she's not here yet so that was just filler.

i know of this happening in real life.
H was out with the lads, pocket called the wife, she heard him grunting away.

they are divorced now

How awful for you. I am assuming she has done it in this way because if she just whatsapped you and said they had cheated he could accuse her of lying. With this proof he cant deny it?

Doesn't sound like a one off to me. Sounds like he has been stringing her along and she is sick of it.

On my whatsapp (iPhone) there is a microphone button on the right, next to send button coincidentally.

When you press and hold it, it starts recording, when you release your hold it sends.

V easy to send audio by mistake, I get some from friends often.

No idea how to send Whatsapp but sorry this has happened.

Something similar happened to me years ago. Wasn't as bad but still grim.

Best of luck op.

sorry just getting ready to go back home now
Yes we do live together have been for 6 months I will be confronting him with the message when I get back I have also messages his ex asking when exactly it happen but I haven't had no reply from her and doubt I will.

You are very brave.
I wish you well, OP.

Desert..not very brave at all I'm just trying to hold it all together whilst I'm with my parents that's the last thing I need is for them too get involved deep down I feel sick I keep playing it over and over an it's hurting me more every time.

Hi OP,
Just a thought - and forgive my ignorance about how WhatsApp works - could you upload/save/send the recording somewhere else to make sure he doesn't delete and deny?
All the best with getting an answer.

What is important is to get to the truth today.
Hold it together when you speak to him.
Take some deep breaths - that's what works for me when the heart and adrenalin is pumping away.
If you can keep calm, you will remember his reaction with more clarity.
But what you feel in that moment will probably be the truth.

I can access the messages as they stay in the conversation.

Thank you for your support and understanding I will update later.

I wouldn't mention the message. Do what is so often recommended here. Tell him, "I know. You have one opportunity to come clean and tell me the truth". I'd add that I needed the truth, I needed all of the facts and what will hurt me even more at this point is hearing him lie.

Unfortunately, I imagine that his first reaction will be to say that it's from ages ago. Unless you can figure out when it happened, this is going to be quite rough on you as well - less cut and dried IYSWIM. (although for me it would be an absolute end regardless).

Although I think "it was from ages ago" will be one of his defences.
I don't think it will be his initial reaction.
Not in that first crucial instance.
I think it will be panic.
Rabbit in headlights.
Then the bolt for one of a number of safe holes.

This sounds awful. I have unfortunately heard of similar happening before and a friend saw a video of her husband being given a blow job

Weird thing is that she recorded it and then sent it to you. Makes it sound as though it isn't a one off.

Can I ask how his ex has your number? Seems she planned to let you know perhaps the biggest favour she could ever do you
My ex H was a serial cheater....what a blardy shame

Im surprised there's no accompanying pics!

A slightly different situation (but not much) from my perspective. I was unfortunate (or maybe fortunate?) to receive a 4 minute voicemail from now ex (and would have to admit, that he should have been EX a long time before??) of him visiting a prostitute.

He 'accidentally' called me....

Weird things do happen in life, but for me, I believe for good reason.

As AF often says "the simplest answer, is often the most obvious one".

Unless he can provide you with 100% proof that it is not what you think, then I would assume that anything else he comes out with is diatribe.

OP! I wish you well, but mostly I wish you the fortitude to not let him blindside you. X

Maybe she did it on purpose.

In my darkest most manic phase of my break up with my cheating ex I dreamt of sleeping with my ex and recording it and sending it to OW
Thank goodness the situation never arose. I can only deduce that I was not of sound mind at that time
I know that you were never the OW. But something is going on in her head.

Would be pretty difficult to do it by accident and i highly doubt it's old

Oh Op, I hope you are ok. How awful.

something similar happened to a friend of mine a recording being sent via social media, turned out to be an old recording proved by the fact the fotty was on in the background and no such game was playing when ex said they had slept together.