To be sat on the sofa crying again because MIL is a cunt and DH is a spineless little mummy's boy.

[BramwellBrown]

Sorry long but it doesn't make sense otherwise and I don't want to drip feed.

MIL has spent the last 7 years bullying and belittling me at every opportunity and can be really spiteful.

MIL decided she would take DD to visit a different Father Christmas this year, one of the expensive ones that has a petting farm with reindeer, DD loved the reindeer and said he wasn't a bad Father Christmas as it goes but his grotto wasn't as good as the 'real one' I usually take DD to at the church fair, where FC knows DD's name and asks how her dog is etc (and is my Dad). MIL 'oh for goodness sake you're 6 any normal child your age knows the truth by now, that grubby church hall your mum takes you to isn't real either, there's no such thing as Father Christmas and Christmas is just a made up load of commercial rubbish celebrating the birth of an imaginary baby.' DD is really upset and doesn't even want her advent calendar because she says there's nothing to look forward to now, I know DD was likely to find out the truth about Father Christmas soon and fully expected this to be the last year she really believed in him but I'm furious that MIL would be so spiteful as to tell her like that or imply there was something wrong with her for not knowing and can't even describe how angry I am about the rest of it, I'm Catholic.

MIL then came round yesterday with a huge shopping bag of sweets for DD and none for DS as hes not DH's biological son I told DD to pick 1 for her and 1 for DS and I'd put the rest away for later, MIL starts on about me being mean and ridiculous, part of childhood is eating sweets til you feel sick I mentioned to MIL how upset DD is and MIL started screaming in my face and calling me stupid, DS tried to stick up for me but DH didn't say a word, then this morning MILs just text saying shes picking DD up from school at 3.15, I've said not today, she sent back 'it wasn't a question'. as it happens DD has a school play this afternoon so I will already be at the school (MIL was invited before the argument but school plays are boring) So DH and I have started the day on an argument because I asked him to have a word with his mum and he told me to stop winding her up.

AIBU to think its not I'm winding her up, she's just a cunt and that if DH loved me or had any respect for me he'd step in occasionally, I don't want him to go NC or anything but the odd 'Mum, that's enough' would be nice, I wouldn't let my parents treat him like this and its making me question if i want to be with him anymore.

Without the support of her h. This is a major thing in a relationship, if you haven't got the support of your DH, you may as well flog a dead horse.

YouTheCat
Twizzle, you actually said you would just keep on asking if the OP didn't answer. Not a pleasant thing to do and absolutely no need for it if you can manage basic arithmetic.

where did i say that to the op? i was having a short convo with ArsenicSoup and told him/her that i would ask them the same question if they had posted similar - try READING the thread properly instead of trying to twist other people's words to suit your own agenda.

Well, Twizzle, I think you should rein in your nosiness. Because of your persistence in needing this irrelevant piece of information the OP has ended up sharing something deeply personal and upsetting for her

This is a public forum in case you hadn't noticed and there is no law against being nosey and asking questions. OP decided to answer that question - nobody forced her into it

Things really are unfolding very fast on this thread.

OP I'm absolutely in awe of you and your strength.

Twinkleship pls stop what you're doing.

No, there is no law. That's absolutely true.

But have a little bit of compassion and empathy for the OP who is having a really shitty time. Think how you would want to be treated if you were in this kind of situation, asking for advice.

you accuse me of being shameless yet i'm the only one who has mentioned that it is not ok for the ds to be treated like second class by the adults around him. the rest of you have chosen to ignore that and instead waste your energy on trying to twist my words and misquote me. Projecting your guilt/shame/whatever on to me won't work.

i know you posted why you weren't letting mil near your ds, OP, but that didn't answer the question in regards to your dh - which was "why are your ds feelings and the way he gets treated by other adults not as important as your dd?"

twizzle FFS, Back Off her!

pinkyrednose Please don't tell me what to do. I do have the right to reply - especially when people are deliberately misquoting me and slandering me - or is the right to reply against MN rules now?

arsenic Back off targeting me!

Twizzle carry on luv, you're only making yourself look idiotic.

as idiotic as those who are deliberately misquoting me to suit their own agendas? Nah - i doubt it very much

Did you read the answer to your 'not against any law', 'nosey' enquiry 'for clarification'?

twizzle there's a thing people do when they're desperate for attention - it's called starting their own thread.

Bramwell agree with other posters, this is a turning point for you and you and DCs will be better off in the long run

You talk about twisted words and yet you're the one twisting the OP's words.

I have no agenda. I have no guilt or shame.

This isn't about you.

If you RTFT, she hasn't kicked him out, he has made the decision to leave.

i know you posted why you weren't letting mil near your ds, OP, but that didn't answer the question in regards to your dh - which was "why are your ds feelings and the way he gets treated by other adults not as important as your dd?

But op did answer you. Here I don't need the advice for DS, so I focused on what I did need to talk through

Which seems very clear to me. It's not about importance, it's about what op needs advice about, which is DD not DS. Why would she wish to discuss anything other than the question she wants answered with a bunch of strangers on the Internet?

desperate for attention? lmao! i'm not the one targeting and jumping on people who dare to have an independent thought/write it/voice it etc if it doesn't agree with mine....

twizzle, you asked the OP if she was 12 years old when she gave birth to her son. Even if that were the case, which it clearly wasn't, would that not have suggested to you considerable vulnerability on the OP's part?

Jesus Christ twizzle give it a fucking rest. There's always one who spectacularly misses the point of the thread and starts arguing about fuck all and making it all about them.

no not really Linerunner, just because you happened to have been a teen mum does not make you automatically 'vulnerable' when you're an adult.

nothern don't think the OP did kick him out. He decided to side with his cunt of a mother.

No, but it certainly makes you more likely to be vulnerable. It's about using a bit of common sense.

Yawn.