Change yr name, make a confession!

[iamsomeoneelse]

A thread to get something deep and dark off your chest -- anonymously!

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I'll get the ball rolling:

I really feel that there are some deep cracks forming in my marriage, and I have a horrible feeling that divorce may be on the horizon after 10+ years of marriage. Part of me is terrified by the effect this might have on my two DDs, but another part of me is quietly excited at the prospect of a new and different kind of relationship.

Northumberland
I fear it. Loneliness is truly awful :(

testing, testing, testing

Thank you. Really appreciated.

DP's best friend was a serial cheater (she told DP and DP told me). Said cheater was married to my best mate. My mate died in tragic accident. At his funeral wife, now widow, gave a eulogy that moved some in the congregation to tears. I sat there thinking "You fucking cunt".

Northumberlandia .
I did the single parent thing, not from choice, and know exactly what you mean.

I've been lonely Northumberlanda and it's hell. If good wishes on line can do anything to help you then you have mine.

drunkandsad

Northumberlandia

Test

Blimey, there are some posts on here. I wonder if it would be better if this thread was moved to 30 Days Only ?

Ok ... around 10 years ago I was doing some OLD and had a regular 2-3 FWB scenarious. All fizzled out bar one which is still ongoing. We meet 2-3 per month and have, in my opinion, the most amazing sex. I didnt know anything about him for first 2 years, not even his real name. Now I know he is married, 2 kids and we work in a similar industry ... thats about all I know about him. He knows equally less about me albeit he knows where I live ...

Breakfast68, what is OLD?

I'm 39 and have been having an on/off affair with a 22 year old at work since February. My DP doesn't know and our relationship isn't great. Since it began, the 22 yo dumped his long term gf and then began a relationship with the 19 yo kitchen girl, also at work. We have sex at work, but I want him more than he wants me, so I'm trying to wean myself off him, but it's a real mess and I'm worn out from the emotional highs and lows of it. No one knows this at all. xx

Porridge On line dating?

Throughout 30 years of marriage I have fantasised about other men - real men that I know - during sex and when masturbating. The current object of my lust is my immediate boss.

A little bit of domination could be just what you need to re-activate your sex life dirtyalert Your husband may have a hidden wild side waiting to be tapped!

Northumberlandia I feel for you. I have been there and its difficult it truely is, but, it does get better

((((((((big hug))))))))))

I love this thread. Nobody has been judgemental yet and it makes you think, well, we are all human. I have been very moved by some of your stories - some because they are so sad, others, because they are so like mine.

Ok - there I go. Like many of you, I have a DH that I love, but we have mismatched sex drives. I do not want to go through the rest of my life without sex. So I may consider one of those online dating sites for attached people, have you ever tried them? My thinking is, my DH might actually be pleased if I stop pestering him. He can't, of course, ever find out as he would be very hurt, but he would actually enjoy the peace. In any case, if I can find the courage to go for it, I would do it for myself - because you only live once.

We have sex about twice a year. I hate him being near me and I feel sick if he touches me. If I have enough to drink and take some pills I can just about cope with it.

I don't know what happened as we used to be fine. Resentment crept in I think.

I wouldn't admit to judging on this thread but I might be having a bit of a judge on the inside.

So, basically you are judging then Lardy but just being pa about it

Recent events have brought back memories of my DMs lack of emotional support and i cant even bear to look at her at the moment.

I wrote this last night:

Me and husband are arguing. He’s been in a bad mood since the meal out with a colleague of his and he wasn’t happy about something his colleague said. I felt embarrassed that he couldn’t put on a brave face, couldn’t put on a smile and move on. I have to try and change the subject and get the mood back, but we leave soon after.

Back home I try to cheer him up, by preparing a bowl of hot water for his feet and the tea he likes, but he says he didn’t know that was for him and he’s too busy to soak his feet. I get rid of the water and get on with cleaning the kitchen, but the next time I’m in the bedroom he’s angry with me. How could I get rid of the water, am I punishing him? He doesn’t understand and is angry. We argue and he threatens me again with divorce. He wants to give up his job so we can move back to his hometown and get a divorce. I explain that I make a lot of effort for him and the fact that he makes me feel bad for my efforts upsets me. I explain his behaviour can be embarrassing and what if that was a relative of mine and he showed his bad moods in front of them – he says he will and what am I going to do about it? We argue more and he say he needs to break something, going out the room and starting to make a racket.

I lock the door behind him. I know what he means is he wants to break me. I wonder how long until he does. We’ve been married three months and this is not the first time he has displayed such aggression. Should I accept defeat, accept divorce and move home to raise my baby alone, away from its violent father? Or should I wait for the first beating? Or the second? Or the first time he flies into a rage with the child, beats the child?

Door locked, ear plugs in, tears run dry. Would it be brave to leave before he turns violent, or is it cowardly to walk away from my 3 month marriage?

I don't know what to do with it.

Dear God Knackered, your post has left me speechless.

I am appalled for you, honestly. You need to start a separate thread using that same post and ask for advice and help about where to go with this enormous problem, which shouldn't be yours to struggle with alone when you already have so much on your plate.

I've read a lot of stuff from some self-absorbed moaning whingebags who love to feel sorry for themselves on MN, but my God, your problem makes some of theirs seem like a walk in the park!