Hi
Back to impart some experience of OD, like i said, sadly more extensive experience than i might wish it to be, however, i have learnt a lot, both about other people, and myself through it, so, though sometimes it might feel like theres no point, there usually is something to learn from the situation, so, hang on in there.
The most important thing to remember is ' people lie on the internet'
they lie not only about height and jobs, which are superficial things, but also about their intentions. Just because someone says they want a relationship, does not mean that they actually do, or that they want one with you.
Google is your friend, google their user name, their name, check FB, the number of shit situations i have not had to go through from doing this, is more than you might think.
Theres this whole ' dont assume you are in a relationship' thing, where you are meant to pretend you dont care that they are online and dating other women, unntil one of you brings it up. Have to say, if a man is interested, he makes it very clear. Ive never known anyone whos got into a relationship from OD, where the man was back online the same night or the next day talking to other women. If a man likes you, he lets you know, there are no games, its easy. If its making you feel uneasy, crap, doubting yourself, then its not worth it. Listen to your gut
Now, there are lots of types f guys out there, thats ignoring the spambots ( fake profiles set up, with employees of the company, to talk to people to keep them on site, higher percentage than you might think) The married ones who will only reply during working hours and not at weekends.
If they have no picture, its 99% likely to be because they are married.
There are the ones who just want sex, who will pretend to be into you, will be full on in terms of messages, wanting to meet quickly. Be careful with these ones, its easy to think they like you.
There are the ones who get talking sex before you meet, or get overly flirty, dont meet them unless you are after a one night thing yourself.
There are the ones that ask you out, then just vanish. Again, most likely married or just a marid of reasons that are nothing to do with you. Lots of men/people do online dating because they are bored, its easy, but when faced with the prospect of an actual date, cant go through with it.
Avoid anyone who will make vague date plans with you, but nothing solid. if they cant make a date to meet you, whats the point. Ive had loads who have said ' this weekend' and then you ask when and they say not sure, so you leave it with them, and then nothing happens and they message you a few days later, you ask what happened and they say it was yourfault or some shit. Its not. If a man wants to see you, he will organise it.
Also avoid anyone who just wants you to come along when hes out on the piss with his mates. This is not a date, this is not even a booty call. I dont even know what it is, other than crap.
Steer clear or anyone recently single, who mentions their ex a lot. They are on the rebound and its likely you will get hurt. They will tell you they are over it and ready to move on, but it couldnt be further from the truth
Anyone that wants your FB, twitter, instagram/ etc etc, before you have met, avoid. Too full on, usually turn out a bit stalkery and possesive.
there are men online who have profiles on there as women ( one confessed this to me) and there are women who have fake profiles as men, be careful. Google search the image.
Avoid anyone whos not actually making conversation with you, if its hard work, then they arent going to be better face to face.
Mostly though, if you talk to people for long enough, maybe 2 weeks or so, it gives them enough time to hang themselves if they are going to. If you meet too soon you run the risk of not knowing enough about them and getting a nasty surprise ( ive been there more times than i should admit) and if you leave it too long you risk it being built up into something its not.
Mostly though, thikn about what you want, and whats important to you. Its really easy when you are dating to get caught in a ' what are they looking for, am i good enough, what are they thinking' type thing, when really it should be the other way round. A man should be on his best behavior when hes first with you. If hes not and things make you feel uncomfortable, listen to your gut and act on it.
Change your profile photo regularly, update what you have as your profile, try and show your personality rather than ' i like wine and watching a film'
Hope thats been of some help?