Secrets we want to tell but can't

[LizzieBelle]

There was a thread on here a few months ago which was full of confessions and secrets that we can't tell in real life...My secret is that I know the neighbour on one side of me is having a naughty affair with the neighbour on the other side of me. As soon and the husband goes to work and the kids go to school she's off with the single dad on the other side of me...

Has anyone else got a secret??

Truth - that is very sad and I think it is time to deal with the reality of the situation.

Bubalou - yes of course that's ok.

My secret:
I fantasise about being 'serviced' by several men at once. I'm young, attractive and think it would be good if the right men were involved. I think my DH would be up for it if I asked him to. I wish I'd done this before I was married - I don't feel I can break my marriage vows, even if one of them was DH.

Oh truthjustthisonce For your own sanity, please please do something! Each choice benefits only one person - him. Please don't waste your life on this complete twunt. You are 40, it's not the 1940's. There is help out there.

I don't know how many people I have slept with (men and women). I have gone long spells without sex, but I truly believe that I am a sex addict.

I sometimes dream that I am a child being willingly and happily abused. I think something happened to me when I was very young but I have managed to suppress it rather too effectively. I don't know if my promiscuity is related to this - it wouldn't surprise me if it was.

I haven't had more than 2-3 hours' proper sleep a night for more years than I care to count. The lack of sleep is driving me crazy (I am constantly exhausted, develop weird tics, see things that aren't there, talk aloud to myself, and hit myself and scratch at my face but cover the marks with makeup) but I can't seem to break the cycle.

I think about committing suicide at least once a day and have done since I was 6/7yo. I have made a couple of attempts in the past but have been foiled each time. I don't think I will follow through with it but it gives me comfort to think that I could if I wanted to.

I work in a very well-respected profession. I have been addicted to prescription painkillers the whole time. I sometimes mix these with other over-the-counter painkillers and/or alcohol. I do this to dull myself to the world - otherwise, the world seems like too much to handle. Yet, to everyone else, I'm extremely diligent and competent.

I am constantly approached and told by others how slim and beautiful I am (this is not a stealth boast, by the way - it happens all the bloody time, both strangers and people I know), yet all I see in the mirror is a fat person with yellow teeth, horrid skin, saggy breasts and a flabby stretch-marked stomach. I smile and say thank you, even though all I want to do is curl up in a ball and cry each time it happens.

I am a mess.

Acrossthelines please get some help.

For the past 2 weeks I have been having the best sex if my life. Not sure when it will end as she is married and 10 years older than me.

I am slightly ashamed to say I don't care if her husband found out-met him once a few months back and didn't take to him.

I should be guilty but I am not.

I once dumped a guy because he was so shit in bed, I never told him that though!

an hour later I was at another lads house having the best sex, known him years always had chemistry and thought if I don't now I never will!

Across - Please do try and access some help.
I can identify with a few things you've wrote in your post - I was addicted to prescription painkillers to numb me and my promiscuity from quite a young age was directly linked to the sexual abuse I suffered as a child. I've also been suicidal and tried to act on it. It took a lot of counselling and time to unravel it all but I'm much much better now.
You need to speak to someone who can help you

Mystery Uh Oh! you crossed the line didn't you. I remember your previous posts on this thread where you were thinking about it.
No good will come of it however it pans out, you know that though so I'm not going to preach.

CarbeDiem, I know you are right. I guess I was a little weak and gave in. I am not expecting any sort of relationship and fully expect it to come to an end pretty soon.

It's juat the naughty, illicit element that is the turn on I think. I am being a bit selfish and know it and when I feel guilty enough then I will end it. Of course she may end it before then in which case I will happily agree. Doesn't make it right I know..

I have constant dreams about sleeping with a woman.

My dad is on the sex offenders register after being being caught grooming , he was talking to a police officer when he thought it was a teenager. I want to tell people why I'm no longer the happy person I used to be. How he has turned my family and marriage up side down, I want to shout from the roof tops how I kept him out of prison and that now he shows no remorse or thanks towards me for it

Watched the Chelsea game earlier on Sky and thanks to this thread every time a certain ex-footballer with a colour in his name was talking my toes curled....what a bloody hypocrite!

Still don't know who the newsreader is!!

douche I empathise my FIL is just starting a prison sentence for similar and we have just told our dc. It's a shit place to be x

Lady what did the newsreader allegedly do/say? Clearly no one should name him//her but I missed the original post.

AcrossTheLines
Print your post. Take it to your gp. If you don't get help, change gp.
You need and deserve help.

I have no idea who the news reader or footballer is! can someone tell me please!

douche and Jakadaal

douchbag and Jakadaal
That must be so difficult to come to terms with but please remember it's not your shame to carry, it's theirs.

The man I slept with a few days ago has a dick shaped like a ducks foot its the weirdest I have ever seen. He has a massive ego and thinks hes the dogs bollocks. He wants to meet up again for sex but I really don't want to so I told him I wanted a relationship and since then he hasnt called yey!

Wey
You've aroused my curiosity :)
A ducks foot? Eh, how is that possible. I've seen quite a few different shapes and sizes but never in that form.

weyayechickenpie does his name begin with T?

My secret is im terrified and totally paranoid social services are going to take my dc. I dont know why ive never had any involvement with them or any reason too. I panic that they will turn up and say im not bieng a good mum and take dc.

I dont know how to get these thoughts out of my head.

Misstiredbuthappy: why do you imagine that this could happen to you? Parents have to be totally dysfunctional, chaotic and neglectful for this to take place. The focus these days is to keep children with their families while they are provided with as much support as possible for as long as possible before they even consider such a course of action. You've got you be a whole world away from merely "not being a good Mum".

If there's no concrete basis for your fears perhaps you could consider talking to someone about them

when I had a child at home, years ago, I was first of all afraid that the hospital would claim her back, saying she belonged to someone else; then afraid social services would take her away; always afraid of accidents and illness. misstired, I think you're normalish and it does get better.