And so after a very lengthy lunch, Mrs C, WWK, pineapple and two twunts re-emerged in the court room in front of DJ SlowSpeaker.
MrsC announced that there had been some frightening new disclosure over lunch, and in fact, MrWT was declaring himself bankrupt with immediate effect, the net effect was the house would be repossessed and her and her son would be facing a very frightening future.
DJ SlowSpeaker then summarised the position. He said:
"To summarise the position, MrWT, you are effectively declaring yourself bankrupt, but you are offering a lump sum, which you cannot pay, but say she can deduct it from your share of the house, which neither your nor your wife will be able to get, until your son turns 18 at the earliest?
The brainless wonder said 'Yes', that is my position.
So in other words, MrWT, you are accepting MrsC's offer, give or take a small piddling amount of money, which you won't see for another 14 years?
Yes, the brainless wonder confirmed.
So to clarify, said DJ Slowspeaker, you are effectively failing to maximise your earning capacity because you are 'too stressed' with divorce, and yet, having being made an offer, you have spent the whole day in court insisting that your 'very fair offer' is actually something that will lead your son to homelessness?
So, the position is, said DJ SlowSpeaker, that MrsC's offer, which I initially considered 'far-fetched' will actually guarantee your son's welfare in the long-term, and I am only concerned with your son.
To make this clear, said DJ SlowSpeaker - I couldn't, quite frankly, give a flying fuck about you two, your lives or your idiocy, but your son is autistic.
At which point (and this was was utterly impressed by) DJ Slow Speaker described the reality of having a child with autism. What that meant for MrsC in real terms: that she had zero earning capacity because her child would always come first, and it cannot be reasoned how he will function as an adult. And in this case, undoubtedly, her child would likely never be an independent adult. And that, that MrWT, rather than provide for his son, has bogged himself down in semantics rather than considering his son's needs, and succumbed to 'stress' rather than focus on his son's very special needs.
Therefore, with that DJ Slowspeaker ordered MrsC's offer be turned into a consent order, with MrWT paying the costs of that, and also added in a 'Nominal Order' so that MrsC can vary the order in the future, when MrWT had recovered from his 'stress-related idleness'.
And with that MrsC became the sole owner of her house. She kept her pension, her car, all the chattels of the home.
MrWT left with many hundreds of pounds to pay in costs and possibly bankrupt.
Even I was stunned.