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Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Who's Desperate and Awful Now....Story of My Divorce from Mr WT...Part 2....

999 replies

MrsC1969HJ · 19/07/2014 20:44

Having reached a 1000 posts, I can hardly believe we are moving onto Thread 2...I have had the most amazing ongoing support from so many and I will always be eternally grateful. Link to Thread 1 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2030270-PLEASE-HELP-DESPERATE-AND-AWFUL-DIVORCE?

OP posts:
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14
TheFormidableMrsC · 26/03/2015 09:57

BRILLIANT bobs...ha ha ha! Right, we're off..

LadyTmalia · 26/03/2015 10:08

Thinking of you today MrsC, hope it all goes well for you and so pleased you have the mifghty WWk on your side, best of luck xx
FormallyknowasJennco

IrianofWay · 26/03/2015 11:39

Good luck!!!

ImpossibleGirl · 26/03/2015 12:12

Thinking of you. Hope all is going to plan. Good luck!!

EauPea · 26/03/2015 12:36

Another delurking to wish you all the best for today.

Don't waste the pineapple and coconut on Pauline, save them for the celebratory cocktails tonight.

AcrossthePond55 · 26/03/2015 13:13

thinking of you & WWK today. Rock on ladies. We're gonna hear you ROOOAAARRR!

DocMcStuffinsBigBookOfOuches · 26/03/2015 13:55

Why aren't you back yet? I have to go out soon, and was so hopeful that there would be an update before I had to leave!

And I can't work out if radio silence is a good thing or bad thing under the circumstances...

Bogeyface · 26/03/2015 14:01

Anyone else really nervous?!

I have butterflies, as if it was MY divorce MrsC was going to court for!

WellWhoKnew · 26/03/2015 14:09

MrsC has a very nice judge but a shit husband.

MrWT has decided that WWK is unreasonable... funny that.

Waiting to go back in to do the deed.

Bogeyface · 26/03/2015 14:11

Why are YOU unreasonable?!

Have they made an offer?

lovesmycake · 26/03/2015 14:18

I'm nervous, I lurk normally but I just really want you to get the outcome you deserve and you really do deserve something wonderful because of all the shit they have put you through.

bobs123 · 26/03/2015 14:24

Fag break? Thanks for the update WWK - such as it is Confused

That comes as a massive surprise that MrWT should think her unreasonable Grin

CallMeNancy · 26/03/2015 14:37

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

nespressofan · 26/03/2015 14:44

Fingers, toes, legs crossed (need to pee!!!). Waiting with baited breath, corkscrew at the ready! xxx

WellWhoKnew · 26/03/2015 15:23

Breathe all. The pineapple has landed completely on target. Will update soon as MrsC has something called childcare duties to attend too...

bobs123 · 26/03/2015 15:31

Woo-hoo Smile

WellWhoKnew · 26/03/2015 15:55

MrsC has asked me to fulfil my duties as MN Court Reporter.

Reporting live from "C-Town, for the Daily MN Wail, the case of MrsC v MrWT has concluded today, following lengthy deliberations between the advocate on behalf of MrsC and the stupid brain cell that is MrWT.

Arriving early in court, the fragrant and stunning wife, settled herself into a vestibule outside court and trembled away until the arrival of MrWT and Pauline, who settled themselves down in an adjacent cave, whereupon WWK and MrsC made endless sneery remarks regarding them to entertain ourselves during the long wait for the judge. Advocate for MrsC, was concerned that the opposing side may get bored so took over the intelligently-written 'Position Statement' to amuse them during the wait.

MrWT turned a whiter side of pale.

Pauline's fake tan started to glow rather red.

The pineapple sniggered.

The clerk of the court arrived to check MrWT was okay with the attendance of WWK.

MrWT said "No" loudly but did not explain that this was a complete sentence.

So the judge over-ruled him.

Then, MrsC got going. The judge who...was...the...world's...slowest...speaker explained to all and sundry that this case should conclude today and he couldn't give a flying fuck about what's gone on under the bridge. And with that asked MrsC to make an open offer.

MrsC said I can't do that until I have disclosure from Pauline.

DJ SlowSpeaker ordered it to be handed over immediately.

MrsC gave a brief outline of why she'd rejected MrWT's open offer and said what she expected as a minimum.

The judge laughed the pair of us out of the court....

WellWhoKnew · 26/03/2015 16:01

Once order had been resumed, MrWT was asked to explain his disclosure as it clearly was a 'worrying state of affairs' and made very little, if no sense to anyone, quite frankly.

DJ SlowSpeaker then questioned MrWT on his future prospects, by examining his previous prospects, and concluded MrWT's evidence quite succintly, whereupon both MrsC and WWK shoved their firsts in the mouths, as the world's slowest speaker stated:

"it's a bit grand to call yourself a builder, when in fact you are a mere handyman"...

before adding...and one who makes no attempts to do any handywork.

Whereupon, WWK and MrsC laughed themselves out of court.

TheFormidableMrsC · 26/03/2015 16:02

Pineapple...in anticipation of hearing...;-)

Who's Desperate and Awful Now....Story of My Divorce from Mr WT...Part 2....
bobs123 · 26/03/2015 16:09

"The pineapple sniggered" Grin

Manically refreshing but have to get DD from school Angry Lucky it's pizza for tea!

CallMeNancy · 26/03/2015 16:13

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

ImpossibleGirl · 26/03/2015 16:14
Flowers Hope the final bit was exactly what you wanted.

(Can somebody PLEASE let me know what I missed with the pineapple??)

WellWhoKnew · 26/03/2015 16:15

And so MrsC and WWK took themselves off for a sarnie, a coffee, a few fags and a few swear words.

And so WWK read with great joy the disclosure from Pauline. Quite frankly, I think she's using the same financial advisors as the dearly departed MrSnoweyWhitey.

So we know who is to blame for Britain's poor economic recovery.

So with that MrsC despatched WWK to advocate on her behalf due to the on-going bail restrictions of contact between the 'husband and the wife', it was rather fortunate that the judge demanded WWK's intervention in proceedings, after all.

WWK was able to get MrC to admit that he is facing bankruptcy all of a sudden.

Well, that's a bit unfortunate isn't it?

Whereupon, on further questioning of the impact on MrWT's life, such a 'bankruptcy order' would have, MrWT said "I don't care". Whereupon WWK reminded him there was a small child who would be very much affected by this, and listed the myriad of ways in which his life would take a hell of a beating should he not endeavour to avoid bankruptcy.

Clearly wowed by the unreasonable WWK, MrWT flounced off in a melodramatic waddle.

Whereupon, WWK said 'Don't you want to settle your divorce today then?'.

Whereupon MrWT saluted in a fingerfull manner his reply.

Whereupon, WWK resumed drinking coffee and smoking fags which the much more delectable MrsC.

Given they now had the target in sight.

Lunch took a long time...

TheFormidableMrsC · 26/03/2015 16:17

ImpossibleGirl WWK made a comment on another thread about having a cunning plan, as cunning as the pineapple on the end of her nose. When WWK appeared at my abode, she was holding said pineapple to her nose. The pineapple has had a lovely day out in court, snuggled between us in the waiting area (see pic above) Grin

Bogeyface · 26/03/2015 16:20

So, we have at least established that you two are completely bonkers! :o