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Original poster

Who's Desperate and Awful Now....Story of My Divorce from Mr WT...Part 2....

999 replies

MrsC1969HJ · 19/07/2014 20:44

Having reached a 1000 posts, I can hardly believe we are moving onto Thread 2...I have had the most amazing ongoing support from so many and I will always be eternally grateful. Link to Thread 1 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2030270-PLEASE-HELP-DESPERATE-AND-AWFUL-DIVORCE?

OP posts:
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14
AcrossthePond55 · 05/02/2015 18:03

I think things with DS will work themselves out after the divorce is finished. Right now I think he can't separate you from DS, so to speak, and I'm sure OW isn't helping there! I'm sure she's feeding his belief that there's 'nothing wrong, it's just MrsC making trouble'. Once things are done and his anger & resentment die away, I think he'll be able to reboot himself into a better dad.

Many men (and women) have a hard time acknowledging special needs in their children. They unfortunately see it as a reflection on them rather than it just being the way it is, like a child who needs glasses or has allergies. Hopefully, he'll educate himself.

Izzie595 · 05/02/2015 18:14

Just de lurking. Another truly amazing woman battling through unbelievably appalling circumstances with her dignity intact. Marking my place to follow, and wishing you all the best Flowers

TheFormidableMrsC · 07/02/2015 18:50

Across, as usual, you are full of common sense. I do hope you're right, I can't go on like this with the whole thing, it's just painful and stressful.

Hello Izzie...! Nice to see you here Smile. Thanks for dropping by!

So, in other news, Mr WT has today taken DS to see his parents. However, nobody told me....it's 2 1/2 hours away....I am slightly bewildered by this development. You all know how important they are to me. Will see how this one pans out....

pointythings · 07/02/2015 19:06

Given that you trust his parents around your DS, hanging back and seeing how it pans out is probably your best strategy. Mr WT may well be feeling the need to build bridges - maybe he is starting to realise the extent of his twattishness?

And if not, you know your ILs best - after all this time, are they really going to let you down and take his side? I do sincerely hope not.

WellWhoKnew · 07/02/2015 19:35

KOKO MrsC. Thinking of you. We are both so nearly there, we really are. This is just the last bit of shitstorm before it's over. Our new lives, new landscape and new horizons start to emerge in a few weeks.

You can go on because you've got through much, much worse. And you're amazing. And you're formidable. xx

TheFormidableMrsC · 07/02/2015 19:44

....and nearly a bit pissed...Wine :-) xx

WellWhoKnew · 07/02/2015 20:22

You too? Shall we start a drunken fight?

"I luffs you"....

"No, I luffs you more..."

"No, you cow, I luffs you the mostest!"

TheFormidableMrsC · 07/02/2015 21:03

Ha ha!! We're both evil bitches today according to the STBXH's but I think there is a lot of luff on this page...and I luffs you back you tosspot Grin x

Pinkballoon · 07/02/2015 21:08

Sounds like he made the offer in court, then told her about it later on and she convinced him to offer otherwise - hence the lower offer. I think that they will 'get it' in court, because the judges don't like any sniff of people messing about. Have you got a barrister to cross examine her, or are you doing it?

xxx

TheFormidableMrsC · 07/02/2015 21:26

Pinkballoon, hi lovely, hope you're OK. Most probably. As we are now at the second adjournment of the FDA, there will be no cross examination, I suspect the Judge will question her and we'll take it from there. He made it clear he wants to avoid an FDR and definitely a FH. I suspect FDR will go ahead due to lack of cooperation from them. I have spoken to a friend tonight who works in this area and she was not surprised at the summons and suspected that is what would happen. She also thinks the Judge is doing this because he thinks they have something to hide. It is rare for summons to be issued to third parties in cases like this, according to her. So, will just have to wait and see...!

Pinkballoon · 07/02/2015 21:38

Ouch. She won't like being questioned by the Judge, and on oath. As I'm sure you found, they can be pretty bad tempered. I suspect that she has much to hide - probably on the business front. Oh dear. xxx

TheFormidableMrsC · 07/02/2015 22:01

It is all a mystery, it really is. I can envisage a loss of temper as is her temperament. Alternatively, this might be the beginning of the end for me, I bloody hope so, need to get this divorce now, even though I wish I wasn't (getting divorced that is). I don't want it at all. Go figure, I'd never have him back. I just can't believe it has come to this and still can't believe my marriage is over even though I can now see what a farce it was. Awful. We have to keep smiling don't we? x

strong123 · 08/02/2015 00:24

Keep smiling - you are not alone xx

mix56 · 08/02/2015 10:42

well you can regret he is a dick, you can regret you didn't have a successful marriage. through none of your own fault OK.
I really hope the judge sees it for what it is, that OW is lying & both are trying to cheat you out of your fair share. I hope, infact pray, that the judgement gives you a huge lions share of his, & hopefully her money :o)
Following which she is bitter & twisted & their little fling is in shreds. & He ends up out on his ear.
Sorry, they both deserve nothing but scorn

Pinkballoon · 08/02/2015 17:11

I think that her going to court will be the beginning of the end for them too. The extent to which they've tried to hide their finances means that either there is much to hide (IYSWIM!), and/or she is determined to ensure that they don't have to pay out anymore than they'd hoped. Either way, she's not going to be happy, because it will all come out and they will have to pay what is fair. Also think that he is digging his heels in on the finances because he's not confident that their relationship will last, and knows he can't come back to you - so he'll need money when she kicks him out.

I suspect that all of this together with his infidelities during their relationship will spell the end of their relationship.

xxx

AcrossthePond55 · 08/02/2015 18:30

Once again, it would be worth the trans-Atlantic flight to sit in the courtroom when she's being questioned by the judge. And honestly, IMHO, it might possibly be the death blow on their 'relationship'. I don't think she bargained on having her finances displayed or 'disrupted' by her paramour's need to support his child. I have a feeling that if this results in a decrease in her disposable income or a lessening of her 'lifestyle' in any way due to Mr WT's child maintenance payments, she'll kick his arse to the kerb. He probably knows that, too, which accounts for the way he's gone down hill since he's left! They both thought they'd just skip off into the sunset tossing rose petals to the wind. But the Day of Reckoning approacheth. Time for Mr Justice to open that can of whoop-ass!

acatcalledjohn · 16/02/2015 22:29

How are you, MrsC? Has it been quiet on the Mr WT front?

AcrossthePond55 · 25/02/2015 20:18

Long time, no hear. Hope this means all is going well for you.

AcrossthePond55 · 09/03/2015 16:45

A month since your last post. Assume you've either 'gone stealth' for a very good reason, or you are doing so well that you no longer need to post. Either way, my best wishes go with you.

If you resurrect this thread, send me a PM.

TheFormidableMrsC · 09/03/2015 17:12

Across, hi, and everybody else. I am so sorry for not posting recently. Things are far from OK, I am really struggling, a lot going on. All very very unpleasant. I will attempt to post properly this evening or tomorrow evening. I have to be very careful at the moment. Bear with me ladies and please don't go away...xx

Weebirdie · 09/03/2015 17:49

Oh my goodness. xxxxx

AcrossthePond55 · 09/03/2015 18:00

Well hello then Lovely. Please only share what is 'safe' to share. You know we're here for you whether it's for the full lowdown or just a brief hello.

Jennco · 09/03/2015 20:19

Wishing you well MrsC

LittleRedDinosaur · 09/03/2015 22:09

Delurking Mrs C, so sorry to hear things are so tough. Just wanted to say that the way you have dealt with all this shit has been brilliant- truly inspirational.
I often think of you and wish you the happiness you deserve

Izzie595 · 11/03/2015 20:27

Thinking of you. Been checking daily. So sorry you're having such an awful time at the moment