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Relationships

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you need help urgently or expert advice, please see our domestic violence webguide and/or relationships webguide. Many Mumsnetters experiencing domestic abuse have found this thread helpful: Listen up, everybody

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Who's Desperate and Awful Now....Story of My Divorce from Mr WT...Part 2....

999 replies

MrsC1969HJ · 19/07/2014 20:44

Having reached a 1000 posts, I can hardly believe we are moving onto Thread 2...I have had the most amazing ongoing support from so many and I will always be eternally grateful. Link to Thread 1 www.mumsnet.com/Talk/relationships/2030270-PLEASE-HELP-DESPERATE-AND-AWFUL-DIVORCE?

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AcrossthePond55 · 22/01/2015 21:32

Hello there, Sweetie Darling Grin.

Hope all is going well and I'm looking forward to your latest update!

Life IS an adventure, isn't it?

pointythings · 22/01/2015 22:02

Sooooo good to hear from you!
Update when you can, we aren't your first priority and we will carry on waving our pompoms regardless. Find some calmer waters and then let us know all about it - I will do my best to come up with suitable images to make you laugh.

2015 is going to be your year.

WhatchaMaCalllit · 26/01/2015 15:42

I'm delurking to say that I think that both you MrsC1969HJ and WWK are a credit to yourselves and are inspirational!
Keep on doing what you're doing as you're doing it so well!!!

MrsC1969HJ · 26/01/2015 16:09

Thank you WhatchaMaCalllit! Not feeling too inspirational today...in Court tomorrow....feeling a bit apprehensive. Hopefully after this hearing I will have time to update the thread. Wish me luck girls :-)

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WellWhoKnew · 26/01/2015 16:12

Good luck, Mrs C. We'll chat later as I'm still busy sobering up from last night. More incoming fuckwittery just arrived my side...

Remember, we know this ends. We just don't know when. xx

MrsC1969HJ · 26/01/2015 16:30

No problem WWK...I'll call after DS is in bed. Incoming fuckwittery left, right and centre it appears! Indeed...I wish I could say the end is in sight. but I can't. So we will just KOKO x

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pointythings · 26/01/2015 17:41

Sheesh, you two should start a club! Can I wave my pompoms for you too, WKW?

All the very best to both of you.

pointythings · 26/01/2015 17:41

WWK, even Blush.

And I can't even blame the Wine for my typing as I've not had any.

MrsC1969HJ · 26/01/2015 18:08

Ha ha, thanks Pointy. We knew what you meant Flowers Grin.

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AcrossthePond55 · 26/01/2015 21:15

Sticking pins in Mr WT voodoo doll as we speak!

Best of luck tomorrow.

MrsC1969HJ · 26/01/2015 21:39

Ha ha Across...that made me smile! Thank you Flowers

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pointythings · 26/01/2015 21:57

Best of luck from me too, I will be keeping everything crossed. Except when I am driving, obviously.

Don't rush to update if you feel exhausted though, give yourself processing time. We can all wait. and chomp on the floorboards in impatience because hey, all that fibre is bound to be good for us

MrsC1969HJ · 27/01/2015 20:37

Evening ladies, I need to take some care in posting the results of today's hearing. We have another adjournment of the FDA, unusual to say the least, this is the second one. Different Judge, fair, but reasonably harsh. I didn't actually keep my cool this time, not helped by the fact my McKenzie Friend (somebody close) sadly had to withdraw at the 11th hour due to a bereavement hence her calming influence was missing. I did talk over Mr WT, I did interrupt and I did (a tiny bit) argue with the Judge. However, I do believe that he cut me some slack given the self-representing issue. He has, however, made it quite clear that he does not want this to go to trial and indeed does not want it to go to FDR either. He is correct in his assumption that this is not a huge asset base and should have been easily sorted out. Indeed, had Mr WT not behaved like such a huge WT over the past 16 months, it would have indeed been settled and we would have been long divorced. In terms of OW's continued lack of co-operation, she is now subject to a summons and hence will be in court for the next hearing (if she has any sense). Judge was unimpressed with her frankly nasty letters refusing to co-operate. Judge told Mr WT that he had the power to imprison OW and was she aware of that fact? Mr WT pulled a face that reminded me of what happens to your facial structure when you suck lemons. Mr WT then did something astonishing, he asked the Judge what would happen if a) he moved out or b) the split up. The Judge responded along the lines of "you've said it in Court hence we would take no notice". Some people are so unbelievably stupid it makes your hair stand on end.

So, I now await the next order, the date of the resumption of round 3 of the FDA and I have an offer to consider...which indeed I will consider and I will counter offer....once ALL disclosure is in place.

I am not entirely sure of Mr WT's state of mind at the moment...he looks like a different person these days. He says he goes to bed at night and prays not to wake up, but it never happens. That's fine, but I wish he'd just sort out the life insurance first....!

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Pinkballoon · 27/01/2015 21:17

Enjoy the moment when the judge refers to her letters when talking to her in court. And try hard not to laugh! xxx

pointythings · 27/01/2015 21:46

That sounds like a pretty tough day, MrsC and I am sorry that your friend couldn't be there. However, it does sound as if the judge understood where you were coming from, otherwise he would have been a lot tougher on you instead of disapproving of Mr WT...

Part of me would love to see the OW refuse to attend court and get done for contempt...

Fontella · 27/01/2015 21:48

Mr WT pulled a face that reminded me of what happens to your facial structure when you suck lemons.

GrinGrinGrin

WellWhoKnew · 28/01/2015 03:05

MrsC - you know, I know, the judge knows, with some people you just gotta let some things 'sink in'.

Being bright lasses ourselves, we can sometimes be a little impatient about that.

You did just fine today. xx

AcrossthePond55 · 28/01/2015 15:03

He really IS an idiot, isn't he? "Hmmm, let me ask the judge ahead of time if my secret plan to move out and so avoid OW's income being counted will work." Ummm, NO!

I think you did very well if all you did was talk over and interrupt a little bit. I probably would have at the very least thrown a shoe at Mr WT and shouted "Oh, DO grow up, arsehole!!". As far as the judge wanting to avoid a long, drawn out thing, hopefully he realizes that it's not in your hands. Mr WT is the one who hasn't cooperated, all you can do is wait for him to comply with the court's orders.

Too bad they don't allow drinking in court. You and His Honour could have quite a good drinking game; each time Mr WT says something stupid, you take a shot. Unfortunately, you'd both be blitzed within 5 minutes of the start of the session!!

pointythings · 28/01/2015 16:57

GrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrinGrin Across

AcrossthePond55 · 28/01/2015 18:46

Oh yeeeessshhh, pointy! I downed 3 shots myself just for his twattishness reading MrsC's post!Grin

pointythings · 28/01/2015 20:57

I had some Wine last night, but that was because of a stressful evening with DD1 (teenager) and (stressed out) DH. Could have done without all that, but the image of MrsC and the judge doing shots in court is just priceless...

MrsC1969HJ · 28/01/2015 22:46

Ha ha, that did make me smile! I have to say I had a lot of wine last night and am having a bit more tonight. Having done my set 3 weeks of dry January (only because I had to have a drink last Saturday, another story). I am wondering what is going to happen next. I am preparing myself for all sorts of backlash hell. Hopefully, they'll just do what they are supposed to and comply with the order. I won't receive it for a while yet, Judge sat writing for quite some time and it will have to be typed etc...his irritation was clear though. To be fair, he was irritated with me too. I take that on the chin and will endeavour to end this process asap. I can then get my divorce...

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pointythings · 28/01/2015 23:00

Well, there's clearly going to be a next time. Let's hope your supporter can be there with you so that all the judge's wrath will fall on Mr WT. You have done nothing wrong, your inability to keep quiet in court is completely understandable. The judge does not know how much shit you have had to put up with. I'll bet he was a lot more irritated with Mr WT than he was with you though.

Tonight has been peaceful - am going to bed now that I have replied to you - and it is good to know that we do not need to have the whole house rewired, we just need sockets and light flexes replacing. Thank goodness for honest electricians and plumbers.

inlectorecumbit · 28/01/2015 23:00

Then we can party with WWK --plenty Wine Wine Wine Wine Wine Wine and some Cake with the occasional Brew. Wine Wine WineThen more

WellWhoKnew · 28/01/2015 23:46

Someone say party??? I only turn up if there's vodka y'know!

Think I'm next on the Absolute though...