Well, I'm impressed this has gone so far. I thought internet conversations like this fizzled out and ended after the "ditch him, he's a pig" stage.
What questions would you pose to the DH if you knew he was present in the conversation?
I'm sure he's not quite the misogynistic, mansplainin', sexist, dummy-spitting, one-dimensional walking rape-dispenser that he's been made out to be in this thread, albeit not by his DW.
I daresay he's actually in possession of a fully fleshed-out character and displays the full gamut of adult emotions, besides the male-stereotypical; sleepy, hungry, horny.
It is worth acknowledging that is would be very rare for sulking to be any person's go-to response for issues like this.
It is far more likely that this sex-related issue is something that has cropped up before, and has been discussed multiple times, to no avail.
The DH, as a functioning adult, has most likely first tried all forms of civilised discourse, and upon failure, with him still feeling as though he is not having some of his perceived needs met, has reverted to the least disruptive of all remaining courses of action that still enable him to feel as though he is not helplessly subject to the transient desires of his DW, enabling him to outwardly express, rather than inwardly repress his dissatisfaction, as our much exemplified 1950's housewives were made to do.
Important to note, the " yes,no, of course dear slopes off to wank " course of action seems to reduce him to a sex object, to be used as his DW's whims dictate, subjugated.
He's not expecting his DW to do something that she doesn't want to do.
He's expressing his frustration at the fact that there is so little that she is willing to do outside of PIV, which is so easily blocked by situations such as these, whereby there is a whole gamut of activities which are not.
He wants her to want him.
Of course he has no interest in forcing himself on a unwilling person, that is plainly not the modus operandi through which he gains his sexual satisfaction. He derives his satisfaction from the giving of pleasure, and the feeling of being desired.
A wank can fulfil the physical need for orgasm, not the desire to be sexually desired, or the desire to give sexual pleasure to another.
If there is a "whitelist" of sexual activities, containing exclusively PIV, is it not easier to see his frustration at trying to find a mutual compromise, willing to accept any available feelings of sexual desire in the obvious (and perfectly valid) unavailability of PIV.
This is not a dig at the OP, the couple are clearly very much in love, and to summarily judge their situation from a few abstract lines in an internet forum does their relationship a huge disrespect. The DH is doubtless reading this thread and thinking introspectively, not sitting in the corner cross-legged, picking his nose and scowling at the world for picking on him.